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Writing a post on Chowhound...and then deleting it before posting.

I have been posting on Chowhound for a little over four years, which makes me a 'newbie' to some CH's I know.

Every once in a while, I find myself responding to a thread, or a particular post on a thread, and then I don't actually post it.

Does anyone else find themselves doing this?

The posts that I write and then not post, are not usually posts that I reconsider because I have second thoughts about them being flagged. They are usually posts that I have second thoughts about because I think I might be revealing information that is too personal (and I've revealed a lot of personal information in an anonymous way on CH.) i have also deleted posts before posting because I realize what I have written is too far off-topic, and I go off-topic too much as it is. Finally, I delete posts before posting becaue sometimes after writing them I think to myself, does anybody really care about what I have just written? My posts can be silly and or irreverent at times I know.

As a matter of fact, I almost deleted this post just now.....

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  1. I assume you're asking us for examples of our own :) Of which, for me, there are plenty.

    4 Replies
    1. re: c oliver

      Not examples, necessarily.

      I ust wrote a reply to a dredged up, 7 year old thread, about eating raw chicken and pork. After writing my smart-assed response I realized that it would not add much to the thread and then I had to explain why I was responding to a recent post on the thread (to someone I know) instead of the OP (whom I did not recognize).

      By the time I was done writing I realized how rediculous it was and just closed the window without posting.

      I think I do this at least once a week.

      1. re: John E.

        Because I've been "disciplined" more than once, I am learning to be more circumspect. But, more importantly, I DO write things that before I hit "reply," I realize that I'm adding nothing to the convo. Or that I'm baiting someone. Which will garner me another 'slap.'

        But really, I'm oh so slowly learning to not post (sometime?) unless I can add something. And I really, really try to be less critical. Mea culpa everybody.

        1. re: John E.

          Isn't this a universally good idea in life? Think before you speak...type.

          1. re: John E.

            Do it all the time for various reasons. Sometimes I just find what I have written to be clumsy and would prefer not to fuel the ire of the writing police.

        2. I've done all of that - and more!

          I write probably around three times as many posts than I deem worthy to hit "Reply."

          My reasoning is much like yours (on this topic anyway), except I will add this: When replying to a topic, I usually look at what I've written and decide I don't really care about the subject. Why I can't decide that *before* I write is a mystery.

          1 Reply
          1. re: MplsM ary

            "Why I can't decide that *before* I write is a mystery."
            Because unlike IRL, where we just blurt out our words and you can't drag them back in and leave them unsaid, the time it takes to actually type them out from a keyboard allows the brain to adjust and say to yourself "REALLY? Do you REALLY want to say that?"

            Just my 25 cents. (Inflation) :-)

            ETA: And sometimes I respond "YES, I want to say that!" And I later get my hand slapped by the Mods and a Mom finger waved in front of my nose saying "don't do that again!" ;-)

          2. John, I do it too. More often, I am condensing my post before I hit the reply button. I tend to tell a bit too much, and edit out what really doesn't pertain, or is, as you suggested, too personal.

            Now and then, I'll just give up and hit the 'back' button before posting it at all. As others have said, rethinking the value of the entire post.

            Too bad we can't do this when we are having a real actual conversation. Sometimes a 'delete' button on our mouths would serve!

            1. All the time.

              Usually, it's because I realize that I'm sharing a personal experience that other posters WIll Say Is Wrong -- wrong in an "impossible" or "incorrect" way ["you may have thought this happened but..." responses]..
              And since I've lived it... well, I decide to forgo the drama of other folks telling me I'm wring!

              1 Reply
              1. I do the same, for exactly the reasons you laid out. Probably once or twice a week. Usually it's because I realize that other than hitting the "recommend" button, I have nothing helpful to add.

                1. For me, it isn't out of fear of being flagged, but mostly because I lost interest before getting to the end.

                  1. "Does anyone else find themselves doing this?"

                    Not as often as I should:-)

                    You are not alone and thank you for this thread as a reminder.

                    1. Thank you, thank you, thank you for this. Would that there were more like you. Yes, I've done it too, more and more the longer I hang around. Either I have nothing to add or the thread isn't even worth commenting on.

                      There should be a bubble pop up on some posters when they hit Reply which asks 'Are you sure you really want to post this crap.'

                      1. Yes, I do it all the time to the point that for the past year I mainly have been just reading threads making no comments at all, somewhere halfway through the year I started hitting the recommend button on people's posts as my opinions weren't new and already written out by someone else.

                        Nothing new to add, so no reason to post really.

                        1. I often edit my posts after re-reading them to better convey what I meant to say.

                          I also appreciate the quite generous 2 hour window one has for editing, especially when one has written something one might regret in retrospect.

                          That's never happened to me, of course '-P

                          1. 99.9% of the time I delete a post it's when I'm telling someone to go fuck off. Just before I click reply I realize the post is going to get pulled, I'm going to get the smack on the hand email from the mod's, so I just don't bother.

                            The other .01% of the time I'm drunk and forget what I'm typing while I'm typing it.

                            6 Replies
                            1. re: jrvedivici

                              And it's that other .01% that some of us especially enjoy reading before it gets pulled. ;-)

                              1. re: jrvedivici

                                What LindaWhit said.

                                Are you Hannah Hart's evil twin?

                                1. re: pedalfaster

                                  I had to Google her to see who you were referring to. No we are not twin's a few differences I could find, I'm a supple B cup, she is a firm B, I'm a male, she's a female. Although it appears we both enjoy being drunk.

                                  1. re: jrvedivici

                                    If you had the time to google you might have time to watch some of her "Drunk Kitchen" videos. I find them entertaining.


                                2. re: jrvedivici

                                  .01%? I'm glad to see you've cut down on your drinking! Remember, self-improvement is best approached with patience. I don't want to hear about you running out and joining a gym any time soon, ok?

                                  I agree with you, however, it's always wise to delete anything you're typing when you have to close one eye to read the screen. Nothing worse than having some old thread pop up years later and realize you have no memory whatsoever of it. Except, maybe, looking at the date stamp and realizing you have no memory whatsoever of the entire week . . . .

                                  There are a couple of other guidelines I'll employ when deciding to click "Reply". First, is always read what's been posted already. Second, read what I've written. Also, I try to be mindful that if I get up and eat something before finishing those first two steps, then I'm probably too stoned to contribute.

                                  1. re: MGZ

                                    Whoa Nelly!!! Remember this is just about how many drunk topic's I delete, not a reflection of how often I'm drunk posting!! I leave most of my drunk posts as-is, unless of course I'm telling someone to fuck off, as noted above. Don't you worry there are no gym memberships in my future!

                                3. I do sometimes. Mostly I think I get about half way through writing my post and get lazy and don't feel like writing anymore, so delete. I post mostly through my iPhone so it can be a bitch. Or I don't think what I've typed is conveying the point I'm trying to make well enough, and again, I get too lazy to fix that, so delete.

                                  1. I do this more often than not lately. Sometimes because I realize that what I've typed is addressed elsewhere in the thread (maybe spread among several posts).

                                    The other reason is that I try to avoid maybe 5-7 posters who seem to find any opinion, fact, or punctuation mark as a reason to argue. (Lol, I can almost guarantee that one or more will show up and protest that we're all just 'discussing', 'sharing opinions', etc.) I don't come here to argue and the tactics used are too passive-aggressive for me.

                                    And I think I'll be wishing I had erased this post too. Such is life. :)

                                    1. Similar to this, does anyone else edit multiple times after posting before the edit button disappears? For people following the threads, do the new edits appear as notifications? I need to stop if so...!

                                      9 Replies
                                      1. re: tofuflower

                                        No, I don't believe they show as new notifications. Once the initial post is up and read by someone, it doesn't "re-open" for others to read again if it's been edited.

                                        1. re: tofuflower

                                          I find it annoying at times when someone edits after I've replied and changes the intent sometimes completely, rendering my and others comments meaningless. I wish, at the least, that like FB it would at least show "edited."

                                          1. re: c oliver

                                            That's a good point. I only edit to make it clearer or remove frivolous information so no one goes "TLDR" on me.

                                            I suppose a way to avoid this is to only respond after the person's 2 hour window is up!

                                              1. re: c oliver

                                                What idea are you talking about? Just teasing - my editing window time has expired, so I can't sabotage you!

                                                1. re: tofuflower

                                                  The waiting two hours to reply one :) An added benefit to that is it's likely someone else will have said what I was going to and then I don't have to.

                                          2. re: tofuflower

                                            I do the type-post-edit-Edit-EDIT all the time when I start a thread, but all of that is within the first few minutes of posting, so I sort-of consider it part of the initial process.

                                            For me, it's mostly typos (fat fingers/ small screens) and spacing issues. I hate that if I use a ")" near the end of a line, it will be moved to its own line by itself -- a formatting thing you don't see until you've posted.

                                            And some times Ch will put in paragraph breaks as a free line, whilst other times it doesn't and I go back and add a line like this:
                                            to create a paragraph break.

                                            1. re: Kris in Beijing

                                              Just an FYI, if you add a space after the ) it will stay on its proper line.

                                          3. I think it might be a good MO for some posters -- to read again what they wrote and think about what exactly they were saying/doing. Ya know, look at things from a little distance.

                                            Betcha it would cut the nastiness on the boards in half.

                                            5 Replies
                                                  1. re: Kris in Beijing

                                                    The vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true!

                                                    OMG, am I the only one to recognize this? :D


                                                    1. re: LindaWhit

                                                      One of the things I thought was my responsibility as a parent was to educate my daughters in movie references (as in "this is the movie where they did ___ first")
                                                      They LOVE The Court Jester and we've seen it 100's of times.
                                                      Definitely a part of the Family Quote Book.

                                            1. yep. not super often, but yes. usually relating to topics that I myself go, do I really even care about this topic? and in responding to others' snarky comments (not even addressed to me), I really do try to restrain myself from scolding.

                                              1. I just thought about this thread. There's a thread I've been reading, but won't comment on (the old "if you don't have anything nice to say" sentiment). I finally had to comment; but then I deleted it so as to not be sucked in to the fray.

                                                15 Replies
                                                1. re: gaffk

                                                  And now it's locked . . . temptation avoided.

                                                    1. re: c oliver

                                                      It was good to let a few uncensored comments fly on that "racist" thread the other night. I knew you and a few others flagged it, so I knew the thread was going to be pulled. It's good to just let your feelings fly from time to time.

                                                      1. re: jrvedivici

                                                        Another racist thread? Jeez. Glad I missed it.

                                                        1. re: linguafood

                                                          This was blatant.....pretty much blaming "blacks and Mexican's" for all that has gone wrong in their life.

                                                          1. re: jrvedivici

                                                            Oh yah. I did see that. It was too stupid for me to even bother.

                                                            1. re: linguafood

                                                              Exactly but it was nice to just let a direct F-bomb or go F-yourself off, knowing the thread was on borrowed time from it's inception.

                                                              1. re: jrvedivici

                                                                I was surprised it lasted as long as it did.

                                                                1. re: jrvedivici

                                                                  Please bear in mind that even if you think a thread is "on borrowed time", it's never ok to engage in personal attacks on Chowhound. Making a small mess into a bigger mess is also a problem for us, so please refrain the next time you come across a thread you think will be deleted. Thanks.

                                                    2. re: gaffk

                                                      You guys sure have not made it easy for a fella to track down the thread you are referencing.

                                                      1. re: John E.

                                                        Yeah, I totally missed the racist thread everybody else is discussing. The post of which I speak was on a board I had never visited before.

                                                        1. re: gaffk

                                                          I had never visited that board before and all the racist posts have been deleted from the now locked thread. I'm not sorry I missed it.

                                                          1. re: gaffk

                                                            You're talking about the gardening one, right? I think those have gotten switched around here. No racism on that one.

                                                            1. re: c oliver

                                                              Color me confused. I guess the offending thread was completely deleted. Never mind.

                                                              1. re: c oliver

                                                                Yes, the gardening thread, which was mercifully locked. The racist one, which I didn't see, was apparently deleted altogether.

                                                        2. The mods would probably appreciate if I did this more often, prob save them about an email a week.

                                                          1. I think there should be no time limit on editing one's own posts, after a few goofs, I find myself less likely to post.

                                                            4 Replies
                                                            1. re: thistle5

                                                              When I've exceed the time limit I can reply to myself. I actually like that better cause there are times I've replied to someone's post, then they edit it and mine can be badly misconstrued.

                                                              1. re: thistle5

                                                                I like the time limit, because if you wait until a bunch of people reply, then sometimes the replys make no sense.

                                                                1. re: TroyTempest

                                                                  Those are the times when I wish it weren't allowed or at least it shows as edited. If the sense of the post has changed then it frequently doesn't make sense. I've replied to some where the poster is being a real jerk. Then later s/he realizes or sobers up and changes it.

                                                                  1. re: c oliver

                                                                    Right. Maybe they could not allow edits to the original post if there were replies. But, that would require a little smarter software.

                                                              2. Not 'til today. That I remember, anyhow. But today, I bought two big fresh sardines at my local Whole Foods. When I got them home, I realized that a) they weren't scaled, let alone gutted and b) one of them had a very mushy texture (probably a freezing/thawing issue), so mushy that I got grossed out and pitched it. So there I am, all steamed that I have to scale and gut and pitch, composing my irate post to the Manhattan board about the nerve! the nerve! of Whole Foods. Then I took a look at my receipt. The two fish cost me $3. And...suddenly it all seemed like not that big a deal.

                                                                PS The fish I ended up keeping and broiling was pretty good. A little dry (I over-broiled it), but pretty good.