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Let's get silly...imaginary mock meats no one wants- GO!

Gefil-tofu

Escargnot

Tofu sLIVER and onions

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      1. re: Science Chick

        'cept that's a real thing - and it's soooo god. I meant good, but I'll mark that as a 'stet'

        not v/v but no reason why you couldn't sub in extrafirm tofu or tempeh.

        http://www.steamykitchen.com/112-shit...

        1. re: hill food

          Hmmm....I wouldn't consider that a "faux meat" thing, since it uses chicken liver instead of goose liver. Just subbing in tofu or tempeh would not result in anything reasonably tasty at all (Just a big ball of butter and tofu!). You need to have ALOT of umami to achieve that. I actually have a great vegan pate recipe that tastes similar to chopped liver, using a combination of lentils, walnuts, miso and umeboshi plum paste to get you there:

          http://www.bojongourmet.com/2011/04/l...

          But as the OP said...just being silly here with faux meat products no one would like!

          1. re: Science Chick

            I've definitely had good vegetarian liverwurst in the Netherlands and Germany. Of course, it isn't "low fat".

            And various versions of mock chicken liver have existed for a long time.

            I'd think some of the umami could derive from nutritional yeast.

            And science chick, that pâté looks great.

        2. re: Science Chick

          Love it! I'll steal that idea and add

          Rocky Mountain Fauxsters/no-calf fries

            1. re: Ttrockwood

              That's actually kind of tempting. I've always been curious about the kelp caviar too...

              http://www.igourmet.com/shoppe/Kelp-V...

          1. Quail shaped tofurkey

            Beet burgers that bleed when you cut them

            3 Replies
            1. re: Ttrockwood

              Quail tofurkey- with birdshot. More fun shooting it than eating it.

              1. re: Ttrockwood

                They make just that beet burger at a restaurant here in Albuquerque, Ttrockwood. Doesn't taste bad, but does bleed quite a bit.

                1. re: ninrn

                  Mmmm...I actually want one with herb goat cheese. Just maybe not extra "rare" and I definitely won't wear white.

              2. TongueFu. C'mon, y'all were thinkin' it.