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Paula Deen: I’m Just Like ‘That Black Football Player’

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      1. “It’s like that black football player who recently came out. He said, ‘I just want to be known as a football player. I don’t want to be known as a gay football player."

        So she says he just wants "to be known as a football player" but she has to call him "that black football player". There are no words...

        13 Replies
        1. re: MacTAC

          Maybe we're supposed to believe she was trying to be sensitive to his desire not to be known as a gay football player by simply labeling him a black one--just in case we forgot which one she might be talking about. ;P

          1. re: MacTAC

            English teacher chiming in here...

            Remember when we got on Bill Clinton's case for calling Monica Lewinsky "that woman" instead of using her real name ("I did not have sex with that woman.") Folks who know their psycho-linguistics, heard the following in Clinton's choice of words: The phrase "that woman" is inherently demeaning. It says, "That person is so unimportant to me that I can't even be bothered to know/utter her name."

            That's what's going on with Paul Deen. She mercifully didn't use the N-word this time, but assigning Michael Sam a label ("that black football player) instead of using his name shows that Deen doesn't value him enough to learn/utter his name. Of course, she's not above trying to use the "embattled" part of Sam's story to her advantage. But know his name because he is a distinct individual? Not gonna happen according to Deen's values!

            1. re: Indy 67

              Maybe she doesn't know his name. I'm gay and you would think this is something big for gay rights, but I have no idea in the world what his name is.

              1. re: ttoommyy

                So how would you refer to him if you wanted to bring him up in a conversation?

                1. re: DeppityDawg

                  The professional football player who recently came out

                  1. re: debbiel

                    He's not professional yet. That's why the story is considered newsworthy: people want to see how his announcement will affect his chances of becoming pro in May.

                    1. re: DeppityDawg

                      Oh that's right. I forgot. So...The college football player expected to be drafted who came out

                  2. re: DeppityDawg

                    I would just say who is that football player that came out as gay?

                    1. re: DeppityDawg

                      ...and I am not focusing on being politically correct either. I just don't attach any personal characteristics to someone's profession....black doctor, fat waitress, gay dentist, short cop, etc.

                      1. re: DeppityDawg

                        In all honesty? I might say "that black football player who came out." Or I might say "that football player who came out." I come from a time and place where it was commonplace to state something like the former. Do I mean anything derogatory by it? Of course not. Old habits are hard to break. I am not saying I am right or wrong; just being honest. And as a gay man who hears a gay slur/stereoptypical comment about gays at least once a day, well, I have no idea what this says about me.

                        1. re: ttoommyy

                          My father used to do this a lot. He'd be telling a story and say something like, "So the shoe salesman comes over, black guy, and ...." or "This black guy was at the gas station..." When I was in junior high school, I started interrupting him with something like, "Does his being black have anything to do with the story?" He would always insist that it did. We'd get to the end of the story and, nope, race had nothing to do with the story. I'd point that out. Dad would grumble at me.

                          Then sometime in my early 30s, he finally understood that what he was doing/saying was a manifestation of the racism he had grown up with and had been trying to overcome. And he stopped. Though he would occasionally try to get a laugh out of me by saying something like, "So the shoe salesman came over, white guy, and..."

                          1. re: debbiel

                            In my case, it's not a holdover of hateful racism as much it is a holdover of growing up in typically white areas where there were no blacks. If a black person entered into the story, it was "important" back then because it meant someone not from the neighborhood. I don't think we ever meant it to be racist. Believe it or not, you also heard it on TV news reports even when it had nothing to do with the story. Like I said in my previous post, it was a different time and place. Just look at the conversations that go on when people speculate if an actor or actress is gay. I would say this is a very popular workplace conversation, and even the most open-minded person will say, "not that it matters! My college roommate was a lesbian. I'm cool with that." Or something like that. Maybe one day this too will be a non-issue. :)

                            1. re: debbiel

                              My elderly father still does this. Sometimes I correct him. He understands the issue, but like you say, it's a habit.

                  3. Isn't he black? Pssst...I think he knows. Let's not go lynching this lady again

                    32 Replies
                    1. re: BiscuitBoy

                      Psst... He also knows he's gay.

                      You don't see the irony of her saying he only wants to be known as a football player and she calls him that black football player which has NOTHING to do with the issue?

                      1. re: MacTAC

                        But he IS black! And if this is supposed to be about equality he should be treated like everyone else...no special treatment, or tip-toeing around the fact that he's BLACK! I'm no fan of this lady, but I think we're being over sensitive here, and trying to find fault where none exists. Who really cares what this fat old white woman has to say, anyway?!!

                        1. re: BiscuitBoy

                          With you 100% on your last sentence. At least she's not hawking pharmaceuticals anymore.

                          1. re: BiscuitBoy

                            Point is she could have used his name. She's Also trying to compare apples to oranges. She just doesn't get it.

                            1. re: BiscuitBoy

                              "Who really cares what this fat old white woman has to say, anyway?"

                              Well, so long as we aren't judging people's worth based on superficial characteristics.

                              1. re: ennuisans

                                Is there no levity to be had here? SHEESH.

                                1. re: ennuisans

                                  I guess YOU judged her, because I didn't. I just described her...and in nicer terms that some did downthread

                            2. re: BiscuitBoy

                              Of course he knows he's black. But it's not like there was also a white football player who came out. There's no reason to mention the fact that he's black.

                              1. re: donovt

                                There is no stigma to being black, therefore no reason to be sheepish to describe him so. When you assign a negative more to a group of people, you are manufacturing racism, and have become the true racist

                                1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                  That's ridiculous. There's no stigma to being black obviously. If he was white, do you think she would have said "that white football player"? Again, there is absolutely no reason to describe him as "that black football player". He is The only football player who has come out in the last week. Everybody would know who she was talking about without saying that.

                                  1. re: donovt

                                    A few months ago I came across in interesting snippet comparing paula's racist denial/apology with malcolm X's - have to search for it

                                    1. re: donovt

                                      Yeah, I have an elderly relative who describes a friend as "a Jewish woman". I finally called him on it, saying that it was irrelevant, and comes across as derogatory, because it is "classifying" a minority. He wouldn't have said "a Baptist woman".

                                    2. re: BiscuitBoy

                                      Of course there is no stigma to being black. But being black had NOTHING TO DO with why Michael Sam was in the news. It was the fact that he came out as gay prior to being drafted by the NFL. That reason, and that reason alone.

                                      If people aren't supposed to be seeing color, then there is absolutely no reason to have mentioned it in the first place, but she did. So she perpetuates the racism by continuing to mention color, when it was completely unnecessary for her to do so.

                                      1. re: LindaWhit

                                        Ironic, as I see folks like you and donovt as perpetuating racism, by putting terms like "black man" in the closet, not to uttered in mixed company. Also ironic that a bunch of people on a white centric site are discussing this.

                                        If you came home to find a burglar jumping out your bedroom window, would you describe him to the police as 6'2, skinny, that's it? Afterall, he was the ONLY person jumping out your window. No, you would say he was black or white. And if your happy shiney world doesn't see color, or have a deep down prejudice, it shouldn't matter to describe the perp factually

                                        1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                          If you think anyone is putting the term black man in the closet by objecting to its use, you're missing an important point: Michael Sam is embattled because he announced his sexual orientation; he is not embattled because he is black. Sam's race is irrelevant to his situation. The remarks immediately after his announcement ran along the lines of "the NFL isn't ready for an openly gay player in the locker room" No one said "the NFL isn't ready for a black man in the locker room." Therefore, Deen is being spectacularly clueless -- and revealing of her biases -- by using race as the identifying label rather than sexual preference in a situation that has nothing to do with face.

                                          In case there's any doubt about my point, consider the case of Jonathan Martin, the black Miami Dolphins player who was bullied. In that situation accused bullier Richie Ingocnito's taunts focused on Martin's race. Anyone talking about that situation would properly use the words "black player" to identify Martin.

                                          Since Martin's situation does not equal Sam's, the language for the two should not be the same.

                                          1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                            In the case of the burglar, the race is important for the description. Please explain how it is relevant in the actual, real situation we are discussing.

                                            Also, I had no idea this was a white-centric board.

                                              1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                                If you're referring to the white-centric part, I'm sure there are plenty of black, Hispanic and Asian posters who would be surprised to hear that as well.

                                            1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                              And now you're trying to mix apples and oranges. Comparing PD's use of Michael Sam's skin color when it had no bearing on the actual issue, vs. giving a statement to the police to try and catch a burglar, where color WOULD be relevant, are two entirely different things.

                                              1. re: LindaWhit

                                                Like I said, I'm no fan of the woman, but let's not keep hanging the racist label on her because of some perceived slight, choice of wording, or past incidents. Do we go around thinking every german is a goose-stepping nazi white supremacist? Funny, aren't we supposed to be a kinder, gentler, society?

                                                1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                                  And as *I* said, your argument is a straw man, as the situations are entirely different in the use of the descriptive term "black" as it relates to PD's usage about Michael Sam and when giving a description of a burglar robbing a house.

                                                  And for racism to end, the color of one's skin needs to be nonexistent in the eye of the beholder. It isn't in PD's case. But I'm done.

                                                  1. re: LindaWhit

                                                    NOBODY has a clue what Paula was thinking, let's give her the benefit of the doubt and call off the witch hunt

                                                    1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                                      I prefer to give people the benefit of the doubt, but when you have a history of something, you correctly are suspect.

                                                  2. re: BiscuitBoy

                                                    Some people enjoy labeling that ignorant white tr*&h as racist, and they have that right!

                                                    I wouldn't think every German is a Nazi but I would think a white person who regular says heil Hitler is a Nazi. In this case, Paula Deen is trying to say she's not a racist but she sure had plenty of plantation owner fantasies.

                                                    1. re: BiscuitBoy

                                                      Not past incidents, but ongoing behavior. There were serisous allegatioins of racial discrimination in the businesses she owns in the present day (sexual harassment too). Funny how so many people missed that that was the substance of the law suit and focused on the sensationalized use of the n-word.

                                                      Her recent comments as a part of her "comeback" show that she has not learned or changed her attitudes at all.

                                                      1. re: pamf

                                                        "Her recent comments as a part of her "comeback" show that she has not learned or changed her attitudes at all."

                                                        At Sunday's (2/23) events during the South Beach Food and Wine Show, she was joined on stage by Robert Irvine. At one point, Irvine got down on his hands and knees and Paula Deen rode him like a pony shrieking, "I'm back in the saddle again!" This is sufficiently deranged for it to make the Friday night's opening monologue on THE TONIGHT SHOW.

                                                        In trying to find a link to post about this incident, I found an US magazine article that went into more detail. Irvine gave Dean some advice before getting down on his hands and knees: "This is a warning to you. You've apologized. You've eaten crow. You're done. Don't do it anymore. I've been there."

                                                        Apparently, Paula Deen is a spectacularly slow learner. (More likely, her attitudes are so ingrained that she's tone deaf to the racism in her words.) Within three days of receiving that advice, Deen uttered the clueless "that black player" remark that we've been talking about here.

                                                        1. re: Indy 67

                                                          she's 'riden' Irvine at previous shows in Florida. Sort of their little shtick.

                                                          1. re: Withnail42

                                                            Riiiiiight. Because who wouldn't want to enhance their credibility as a chef/restauranteur by crawling around on a stage on hands and knees or being the rider of such a noble steed?

                                                            1. re: Indy 67

                                                              And something like that can't be unseen…ever.

                                                  3. re: BiscuitBoy

                                                    This is a ridiculous non-parallel. If I'm describing someone to the police, physical/racial characteristics are important. It is a completely different scenario.

                                            2. re: BiscuitBoy

                                              You have no idea why Paula used the adjective "black." As most pointed out, who she meant was obvious so that adjective was unnecessary. Given that it was an unnecessary adjective, then you have to wonder why she used it. If she was really familiar with the story, then she could've identified Sam by name, or the school he played for. Instead, she singled out his race, when the story was really about his sexual orientation.

                                              And what's her point? We should overlook the fact that she's racist (or racially insensitive)? PS - I haven't read the article.

                                            3. Holy crap.

                                              And the writer says "It’s getting to the point where we’re wondering if Deen is just f*cking with us, because no one can be this stupid. Right?"

                                              One would like to think that no one could be that stupid, but in the words of Forrest Gump - stupid is as stupid does.

                                              And Powlah Deen definitely does.

                                              1. I haven't read or heard one note of actual apology or even understanding about what she has done wrong - only poor me - and she is just digging and digging.... while I found her mildly annoying before all of this, I now find her offensive and unbelievably stupid.

                                                1. I read what she said carefully...with my internet outrage detector set on high...and couldn't find any clear offenses.

                                                  Yes she touched on race and gayness, two hot buttons, and it was awkward, but if anything it was sympathetic in a self-pitying way.

                                                  She is , of course, a moron for even alluding to race and gayness, because, as we are seeing, people will jump on the (non)issue with glee.

                                                  She's a moron for speaking publicly without a script that was vetted by somebody with a brain.

                                                  She's a moron for thinking that the public/media will give her half a chance. Alec Baldwin gets places to vent/explain his crazed rage like NYT and NY mag. Deen gets shunned for (by my count) far fewer infractions.

                                                  I was tired of her before all the problems. Just go away, PD.

                                                  6 Replies
                                                  1. re: sal_acid

                                                    I'm not sure I'd label her comments as sympathetic, though. There must be a word for it, but I can't dredge it up--saying "I know just how you feel" when the situation really isn't quite the same at all...insinuating you have felt the same unfairness when it's not really on the same level.

                                                    That said, perhaps we do have our collective outrage detectors set too high because we're tired of her, too.

                                                    1. re: sal_acid

                                                      Her kids just signed a cable deal for a show called "Not My Mamma's Gaffs".

                                                      1. re: sal_acid

                                                        I just read the entire article In People, and it was pretty much what you would expect.

                                                        For all her business savvy, Paula must have the worst PR people in history.

                                                        1. re: sal_acid

                                                          It's not about a clear offense, as if she has to adhere to some sort of protocol.

                                                          It's that her situation is nothing at all like Michael Sam's, and that by comparing her own situation to Michael Sam's, she reinforces the notion that she is truly blind to the issues of inequality and discrimination.

                                                          And why did she call Michael Sam "that black football player" when the real issue surrounding him is that he's gay, not that he's black?

                                                          1. re: calumin

                                                            Yes, it was awkward and unwise. She's not real smart.

                                                            It wasn't a good analogy. But she's not that smart nor is she that articulate.

                                                            One can only speculate whether the howls would be worse if the word "gay" left her lips.

                                                            1. re: sal_acid

                                                              No, she wouldn't use the word gay, she would say "fag".

                                                        2. I’m sure this is going to spark some kind of outrage among some of you, but I’m going to share my thoughts sorry if they are not well received.

                                                          Is Paula Dean racist, probably yes? Do I blame her for being a racist as much as I would one of her children or one of my contemporaries, no? (I’m 44 years old) People of Paula’s generation grew up in a more segregated society where racism was still taught and tolerated in most southern homes. It’s very difficult for people to grow out of perceptions they were raised in, stereotypes that were ingrained in them from childhood. Can people change? Yes, and should Paula try, yes….I agree she should. Simply most people do not have the intellectual ability to overcome many of the ideals which they were raised to believe in.

                                                          I tend to give people of Paula’s generation a bit of a “pass” on their narrow or bigoted points of view, again I don’t condone or agree with it, but I do understand why they think the way they do. She is ignorant for sure, but pure evil, no I don’t think so. I hold people of my generation to a much different standard as the world we were born into was a much more diverse world, and if someone my age is racist I believe it to be much more by choice than by true belief. Are there exceptions, sure, there will always be people with hate in their heart, but I don’t believe that racial hatred is preached nearly as much as it was a few generations ago.

                                                          I think the fact she states “that black football player” just demonstrates how ignorant to the fact of how hurtful her words can be. I don’t think she means it as hurtful, but is too dumb, too ignorant to know any better. What Paula needs are much better handler’s to keep her from inserting her foot in mouth and make her aware of how her words are perceived by others.

                                                          Again, I don’t condone nor endorse her or her words in any way.

                                                          11 Replies
                                                          1. re: jrvedivici

                                                            I get the point of what she was saying. He's always going to be labeled as "the gay player" just like she's always going to be labeled after her scandal. It doesn't matter what they do or don't do, they will carry a label branded by society. I don't really feel any need to psychoanalye her. She's not the most eloquent person in the world.

                                                            1. re: jrvedivici

                                                              You have stated her case very well, Jr. Paula Deen is a product of her ancestry, upbringing and generation. The words she uses are not thoughtful but those she has heard all her life. The trouble is, there's no one who gives her advice when she has to face the public, it seems.

                                                              1. re: Gio

                                                                After many years of being on national TV,and being in the public is she really that dumb.Maybe she is..Getting advice to speak in public is ridiculous.What is she five years old.

                                                                1. re: emglow101

                                                                  Yup. She's been concentrating on presenting her life story and her TV programs. Please note, I'm not excusing her. Just trying to understand why she keeps making the same mistakes.

                                                                  1. re: Gio

                                                                    She's an egocentric, fully involved in her own little world that's all about her. She seems to be unable to understand that reality is different from what she's willing to accept. So they aren't "mistakes" to her, because she wasn't wrong in her mind.

                                                                    1. re: LindaWhit

                                                                      Well she was an agoraphobic for years, I would imagine that makes one pretty much self-focused on one's own world.

                                                                2. re: Gio

                                                                  Everyone is a product of her ancestry, upbringing and generation. 30-40 million other people also went through the same time in history in America, but individuals choose to adapt their thinking at different rates.

                                                                  It's not just that her words aren't thoughtful, it's that there's some underlying transformation which didn't happen for her, but did happen for many other people who grew up in that same environment. Otherwise the words she uses would be different.

                                                                  It's unfortunate but since she's the one trying to rebuild her career on a public stage, it all comes under scrutiny.

                                                                  1. re: calumin

                                                                    I'm a bit skeptical about generation excuse for Paula. She was born in 1947. So she was a teenager during the 1960's when the civil rights movement was at it's peak. Somehow, she missed or ignored that.

                                                                    1. re: pamf

                                                                      Couldn't agree more. The people I've known who were, shall we say, "unself-consciously" racist were born in the 20s and 30s. I was born in '57 and live in California, for what that's worth.

                                                                      Needless to say, there are plenty of racists around to this day but they clothe it differently for the most part.

                                                                      Thanks for making a very good point.

                                                                      1. re: pamf

                                                                        Right, and the reason why it is called the civil rights movement and not just the time of civil progression is because there were two opposing sides to the movement.

                                                                        Do we not remember the national guard having to escort the first black students to class as the Governor of Alabama George Wallace tried to stop integration of students? The 60's did more to stir racial bias and discrimination in the South than any event since Lincoln ending slavery.

                                                                        1. re: jrvedivici

                                                                          The 60's did a lot to expose racial bias and discrimination and make it a national issue, but it was already there before the movement started. It was called a movement and not just a civil progression because people supporting it drove meaningful change in the country.

                                                                3. With all the money I'm SURE Pawler is paying professional PR people to rehabilitate her image, has not ONE of them said, "Pawler, stop talking about black people, just stop!".

                                                                  As BB's Skylar put it so eloquently, "shutupshutupshutupshutup..."

                                                                  3 Replies
                                                                  1. re: monavano

                                                                    Yup. She doesn't just need to stop talking about black people.....(let alone gay people)....she just needs to stop talking!

                                                                    She *has* to be surrounding herself with like minded imbeciles? Paying for advice from like minded imbeciles?

                                                                    It is just weird to me, at this point.

                                                                    1. re: sedimental

                                                                      I thought she had changed her PR firm after last year's debacle to one that was headed up by a black woman.

                                                                      Yup - Smith & Co., inspiration for the TV show, "Scandal". One can only wonder what they were thinking when they heard the latest....

                                                                      http://adage.com/article/media/paula-...

                                                                      1. re: LindaWhit

                                                                        They were probably thinking...."why doesn't that stupid white straight woman just shut up"? :)

                                                                  2. I have a friend who just happens to be an African-American woman. Whenever she describes people to me she always refers to their color--especially when she describes the people she works with. i.e. "Oh.."jarona" let me tell you about this crazy white woman I work with"...I don't get offended because I'm white. I just shrug it off. In addition, I have worked with African Americans who have consistently used the word "white" before "woman" or "man" in conversation. Same thing with Deen. Why would I get upset with Deen referring to a football player's skin color when I have friends and acquaintences of color who do that same thing. *shrugs*

                                                                    1. Daaang, she is a white hot mess. At least she didn't call him "that black feller, the one that plays football and is also a gay homosexual."
                                                                      The woman that helped to create and define her original restaurant recipes was "like a sister" without the financial benefits. The body guard who is " like a brother from another mother, and darker then that chalkboard" well he is her employee and likely chooses to put up with her shenanigans because it's a nice gig and a nice paycheck. But at the end of the day, she treats him like her employee and not a member of her family empire.
                                                                      I know personally a couple of agoraphobics. I don't buy her backstory. No one I know of that suffers from that phobia, suddenly gets addicted to being in the national spotlight. And Mizz Pawler is certainly addicted to being in the spotlight.
                                                                      If there is a Paula defender that can answer, how exactly did she overcome her agoraphobia? You would think that would be a major cause that she would talk about and discuss fully her struggles instead of playing the victim card.

                                                                      The biggest insult is not calling him black but speaking about him rather then addressing him by name. I'm sure he will have the grace to ignore her comments... not because she identified him as a black man, but had the audacity to publicly introduce him into her nightmare and suggest that their personal stories had a common denominator.

                                                                      They have nothing in common Mz Deeen

                                                                      6 Replies
                                                                      1. re: Bellachefa

                                                                        I am not a Paula Deen defender, but you could not be more wrong about agoraphobia- despite your ancedotal evidence of knowing "a couple".

                                                                        It is quite common as a matter of fact. Here's a quick list to get you started-

                                                                        http://darkshininglight.blogspot.com/...

                                                                        1. re: BubblyOne

                                                                          A blog of famous people who became reclusive when they became famous? Poppycock.

                                                                          I think the blog is simply one persons journey. There is a huge difference between anxiety attacks and panic attacks and true agoraphobia.

                                                                          1. re: Bellachefa

                                                                            Trust me, since I have it I do know the differences and mine is mostly under control with medication.

                                                                            You have plenty of ammunition to dislike Paula without speculating on something you obviously know nothing about.

                                                                            1. re: BubblyOne

                                                                              Kudos to you for sharing that on a food forum. I have plenty of personal experience about agoraphobia and I don't need a personal blog to teach me, and I don't need to defend my thoughts on Paula's agoraphobia.

                                                                              You have your life experience. I have mine. And I still say she is full of poppycock.

                                                                              I am pleased that you are doing well with your agoraphobia with medication. Good for you. May you continue to get out of the house. But that list of celebrities is bs.

                                                                              1. re: Bellachefa

                                                                                No point in going any further off topic, but some of the people on that list I do know- it is not poppycock to them.

                                                                                Personally, I wouldn't accuse someone of faking an illness with no proof- but that's just me.

                                                                      2. I'm wondering what that guy who invested $75 - $100 million in the latest PD venture is thinking now. You'd think for that amount of money he would have had his own PR people in place for her. Obviously not though.

                                                                        1. Maybe she's not a bigot. Maybe she's just plain stupid.

                                                                          15 Replies
                                                                            1. re: jrvedivici

                                                                              And a bad rash of victimitis with crocodile tears

                                                                              1. re: Bellachefa

                                                                                With a ridiculously incompetent PR firm

                                                                            2. re: chicgail

                                                                              Maybe she dials up the syrupy Suthun' drawl to sound slower than she really is. Dumb like a fox, and all that.

                                                                              1. re: monavano

                                                                                I think you meant crazy. Foxes are bright.

                                                                                1. re: sal_acid

                                                                                  I'm going 60-20-20

                                                                                  60% Stupid - 20% Bigot - 20% High Cholesterol

                                                                                  1. re: jrvedivici

                                                                                    Funny how these ratios remind me of meatloaf mix or ground meat ratios!

                                                                                    1. re: monavano

                                                                                      I would be willing to bet that a ground Paula would make a yummy hamburger!

                                                                                      1. re: jrvedivici

                                                                                        Yes, but too much fat and sugar...not enough substance.

                                                                                        1. re: sedimental

                                                                                          My BUDDY!!!! That's why you use some breadcrumbs and egg as filler!

                                                                                        2. re: jrvedivici

                                                                                          She'd just want it served on a Krispy Kreme donut.

                                                                                          1. re: LindaWhit

                                                                                            Now we are cooking with fire!! You are 110% correct Linda! Dunkin Donuts was doing that for awhile with their breakfast sandwiches, my son must have had 100 of them. I could never bring myself to try it.

                                                                                            1. re: jrvedivici

                                                                                              I couldn't either, but I get the concept, flavor-wise.
                                                                                              Just, no thank you ;-)

                                                                                2. Poor Paula. So many jerks looking for something to be offended by.

                                                                                  1. I just shake my head at her latest foot-in-mouth incident. If I were to choose to be upset about her remarks though, I would choose to be upset about her comparison of her mistakes to that of a man’s public acknowledgment of his sexuality. But, I choose to believe insensitivity and very poor judgment came into play moreso than prejudice of any sort. Does Paula still harbor some ingrained racial and homosexual prejudice? In the words of another female celeb not known for her tact, “You betcha!” But I think there’s a bit of head-in-the-sands mentality of the greater majority to think that one can overcome ingrained prejudice of any sort, immediately, the minute it is pointed out. It is a process. After the initial enlightenment, the light bulb doesn’t burn its brightest as soon as the switch is flipped like the old incandescent bulbs, but rather gradually like the newer CFL ones.

                                                                                    8 Replies
                                                                                    1. re: MrsJonesey

                                                                                      yes I agree, a big point is, she's saying that some stupid things she said, which got her a lot of bad attention, is *exactly like* someone else simply saying a truth about himself, which a small proportion of people think is "bad".

                                                                                      1. re: DGresh

                                                                                        "simply saying a truth about himself, which a small proportion of people think is "bad"."

                                                                                        What world do you live in? Have you noticed same sex marriage is not legal in the majority of US states? And that's just for starters. Maybe being gay is not "bad" in your small circle of friends and family, but try living in this world as a gay person and get back to me.

                                                                                        1. re: ttoommyy

                                                                                          I'll get back to you.

                                                                                          I've lived in this world very successfully as a gay person for 55 years.

                                                                                          And I would have posted Dgresh's remarks but he / she got to them first.

                                                                                          1. re: C. Hamster

                                                                                            That's fair. This is not the forum to discuss this topic so let's table the discussion. :)

                                                                                            1. re: C. Hamster

                                                                                              And I just wanted to add, I was not trying to write you off with my last post; I was really saying that I took this thread off topic and I should not have. So I thought I should be the one to stop it. :)

                                                                                              1. re: ttoommyy

                                                                                                and I apologize for inadvertently offending you. My use of the word "small number" was not to minimize the discrimination that occurs, but rather to "put in a small box" those who think that way. I was trying to marginalize that opinion as the outlier (it should be).