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Social media - do you know CHs who are also friends on social media? And does it add to the experience?

A current thread brought up FB in particular, comparing it to CH. That's its own discussion. But it made me think about the fact that I have a few FB friends who I also know from CH. And I really like that. Hopefully most of us are about more than just food and FB (others also, I'm sure) allows me to know more about them, whereas most of that would be off-topic here. I know about their families, their politics, their hobbies, their travels. As well as food. One in particular shares the most wonderful pictures (fine art, photos, you name it). And knowing them better off CH gives me a different, sometimes better, appreciation of them. Any of you have this experience and how does it work for you?

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  1. Interesting topic. I don't participate in any other social networking community for the sheer pleasure of another person's online company. Having the opportunity to talk about non food topics or topics often referred to as OT on CH makes perfect sense. Also if you have had the experience of meeting people face to face I have no doubt that that opportunity does offer another benefit altogether and creates diff relationships going forward.

    The only differences I see btwn a social network like FB and food based forums like CH is the membership parameters for controlling discussion (how you handle your personal profile, who you friend/unfriend and how many pages you join to broaden your experience) is managed by you and the oversight/moderation of communicating of course is very different.

    I have not joined FB because I don't need another outlet to get my online discussion fix. CH fits the bill.

    1. AFAIK it's at 2 (who knows what friends IRL may be out there lurking) 1 is halfway around the world (so no chance of either of us being a weirdo showing up on the doorstep) and whip-smart-funny and it's cool to get a world perspective from another continent. another, also fun, is from my hometown whose tastes coincide with mine, and as it turns out, we did run in the same circles many many years ago, just never F2F.

      I like the contrast in that.

      although c oliver I'd add you. I'd simultaneously take out a restraining order, but I'd add you (smirk) - see it's funny as even with GPS and a valid address it's hard to find me, oh god when you have to explain a joke it just dies.

      1. Ha!! You guy's think I'm a trouble maker on here!! I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be friendly with me anymore on Chow if you were my Facebook friend.

        63 Replies
        1. re: jrvedivici

          I have had good experiences making friends with many CH's by e-mail, with only one exception.
          No Facebook in my future.

          1. re: Veggo

            Just out of curiosity, "No Facebook in my future", do you mean no Facebook in general, or no crossing between Facebook and Chow?

            1. re: jrvedivici

              I have no urge to sign up on Facebook. It sounds like an endless waste of time with zero intellectual benefit.

              1. re: Veggo

                It's an easy way for me to keep up with my friends, as well as acquaintances. I enjoy knowing what people are up to. It's also a very informal and easy way to get to know people better. I've met lots of people while out and then became Facebook friends with them, and over time, built a real friendship with them via fb interaction. Had I just met them out that once, that interaction alone probably wouldn't have been enough for the comfort of actually exchanging numbers and hanging out right away. But like I said, fb is a very casual way of building these friendships over time.

                I enjoy sharing pictures, sharing my thoughts, etc. it's a fast way to reach lots of people. For instance, if I post asking for a recommendation for a hair salon (which I actually did last week) I'm getting responses from people I never would've thought to call and ask. You don't always know who has the answer.

                1. re: SaraAshley

                  Doesn't anyone use email anymore? I accomplish everything you are describing SaraA by using email. I don't understand why FB is necessary to communicate when we now have texting, email, phones?

                  What does FB offer that these basic tools don't?

                      1. re: Veggo

                        Poking via email is like kissing your cousin, just not the same.

                        1. re: jrvedivici

                          That's close enough. And jr, in the future try to do a better job washing those "hard to reach places".
                          See! It even works here...:)

                      2. re: jrvedivici

                        And the Apps out there pretty much take care of any poking you wish, don't they..

                        1. re: HillJ

                          Hey HillJ!! Do I need to look at your phone? You have "poking" apps? Hmmmmm???

                          1. re: jrvedivici

                            Oh jrv, you shouldn't be surprised at what the folks in my life are teaching me in the least. If I don't stay current, how will I ever stay relevant? LOL!

                      3. re: HillJ

                        Well......I have over 400 friends on fb (which isn't even considered a lot, I know plenty of people who have double that), but anyways, I would never think to email a group that big, ever. I'm not going to send an email to 400 people asking a simple, trivial question, but I would post one on fb. If you think email is informal, fb is even more so. It's not necessary to communicating, but it does add another outlet for communication. I'm a very communicative person who thrives on social interaction, so for me, fb is great.

                        1. re: SaraAshley

                          Unless it was a newsletter, e-vite or some announcement requiring 400 people needing to know, I wouldn't email 400 people at one time either.

                          I only ask the question because of how you were describing FB. If FB gives you some added feature while being able to speak directly to a couple hundred people at the same time with their attention only on your question and the 400 potential friends responding then the big difference is capturing the attention of 400 people ALL at one time over even small interactions. For smaller interactions, info I'd use email, group txt or the phone.

                          1. re: HillJ

                            Well, no. Their attention is never going to be only on your question, your thought, or your picture, but that's what I like about it. I'm sure some people scroll right past without reading everything I say (I know I do sometimes for other people's posts), but I like the surprise of finding out who does read, who agrees, doesn't agree, etc. Again, this is a very informal way of perhaps getting to know someone better, or at least learning something about them. As an example, perhaps I met "John" at a mutual friend's get together. We didn't speak a whole lot, but he remembers me from the party and one day sees my name pop up on his fb, and decides to add me. From there I start posting things as normal, as does he, and I find that I enjoy his opinions and that we have a lot in common, and a friendship begins. Our interaction at the get together was too brief to realize that we even wanted a friendship, but through fb, informally, we discovered this, and now we both have a new friend. :)

                            1. re: SaraAshley

                              Cool, Sara. I hope you live happily ever after and have pretty babies!

                                1. re: jrvedivici

                                  Paul Anka song plays in background....

                                2. re: SaraAshley

                                  I see. Thank you for explaining it.

                            2. re: HillJ

                              FB offers the random (or not so random) encounter that throws a different equation into the mix. ("oh wow your cousin was a neighbor and your great-aunt made the best preserves and then the one my age really screwed up his life")

                              AFAIK not something Ch is here to offer.

                              1. re: hill food

                                I get that different equation over using email but the same type of thing can occur in group emails, group txts and group calls....also Skype. So I'm not won over by FB except to admit that it's popular and lots of folks enjoy using it even if I'm not one of them.

                              2. re: HillJ

                                I find Facebook communication to be faster than email, and much easier for people on the go. For me, a lot of my old friends are moms with young kids, so they don't really have time to sit down and write emails or have phone conversations updating me about their life. One of my very close friends doesn't even have a computer, only a smartphone. But on Facebook, they can post pictures of their kids, and quick snippets of what's going on with them and their families. Also, I like that I can just scroll through my newsfeed and see all the updates at once, whereas with email, I'd have to read through multiple emails, or send multiple emails.

                                One time, a friend (the one without a computer) posted that she was looking for a recipe for pork chops. Through Facebook, I was able to send her links to some of my favorite pork chop recipes. Other people were able to do the same. So, while I could have sent her the recipes via email, she was able to get a lot of input because one question posted resulted in many responses, much like it would here on CH.

                                Also, we used Facebook to plan our Super Bowl party. I guess it's similar to evites, but it was easy to just add our friends and set up the event, collect RSVPs etc.

                                1. re: juliejulez

                                  We use text and IM for all of that right off our phones. Email for other things. Group txt, group IM and group emails. I do the same for book club.

                                  I find txt and IM incredibly fast. As long as you have a cell phone.

                                  Important messages in all forms I just bookmark. Evites I rec' via email.

                                  Glad FB works for you!

                                  1. re: HillJ

                                    I think it's probably a generational thing. I've tried emailing friends and they don't respond, because they don't check their email that often, but check Facebook regularly. Also a lot of people don't have unlimited texting so I try not to text someone if they haven't texted me first. For IM, you have to rely on them having an IM account... most of my friends don't. Because they use Facebook! :)

                                    1. re: juliejulez

                                      Makes sense. The popularity is not lost on me. I just don't need it. I don't believe FB only attracts a certain age group though. You either enjoy FB or you don't.

                                      1. re: HillJ

                                        Another great example for why FB is so great: I organize a weekly jour fixe at one of the numerous Sichuan restaurants in town. What started as a fairly small group has now ballooned into 31 members (no, they don't all show up every week - thank goodness!).

                                        Setting up the event with information on time & at which restaurant we're meeting that particular week is super-easy, as is messaging any or all members of the group.

                                        It is a *lot* more immediate for most of my friends than email, RSVPs are visible for everyone, etc. etc.

                                        I see no downside to FB except for that black hole it sucks you into occasionally. It can be quite the time waster, for sure.

                                        1. re: linguafood

                                          CH's my indulgence for time wasting (spent happily). The book club I belong to doesn't use FB but I'm understanding why some people do...and like me don't.

                                          1. re: HillJ

                                            You have a lot of opinions about Fb, considering you're not on it. Kinda like posting on the Chains board when you don't eat at chains, no?

                                            1. re: linguafood

                                              Yes I do. I've been on FB through the accounts of family & friends, sure. I have a lot of questions about FB. So I'm learning. My only opinion is that the other forms of online communication I do use, work just fine w/out adding FB to the list.

                                                1. re: MamasCooking

                                                  Did I ask one too many questions, lol.

                                                  1. re: HillJ

                                                    Not at all:) Just giggling because I can remember being a school kid in the early 60's and learning long division, fractions etc. by rote and we did not even have calculators. And grocery stores had to punch every item in (like a typewriter keyboard) individually. Fast forward to 2014 where all of us are dependent on technology and loving it. Who could have predicted that?

                                                    1. re: MamasCooking

                                                      As a CH friends says, we have all the knowledge of the universe literally at our fingertips.

                                                      1. re: c oliver

                                                        Sometimes TMI ! Information overload wasn't something I ever thought about in the 60's!

                                                        1. re: HillJ

                                                          Totally. I'm such an info junkie so it feeds my disease. I cooked seared duck breast the other night and, lord in heaven, did I find a lot of recipes, on and off CH.

                                                          1. re: HillJ

                                                            Information overload is the story of my fucking life these days, especially considering that my brain capacity is the slice of a tiny lima bean.

                                                            1. re: kevin

                                                              kevin - a friend predicted about 10 or 15 years ago that in the future, a high level of un-connectivity will be the new status symbol.

                                                              1. re: hill food

                                                                Was Ted Kazinski your friend? Much of his manifesto said the same thing.

                                                          2. re: c oliver

                                                            But you have to filter through the apropos knowledge when using the Internet and you have to make sure that you are efficient when searching for information on the Internet or else ...

                                                            1. re: kevin

                                                              Not sure I understand, kevin. Or what it has to do with my OP :)

                                                              1. re: c oliver

                                                                in reference to info overload and garnering solid recipes, rather than possibly faulty recipes thru diligent internet research.

                                                                oh, well, i'm confused myself. no worries.

                                                                please disregard.

                                                                1. re: kevin

                                                                  NOW I understand :) When faced with the enormity of even CH recipes, it's overwhelming. Then you leave CH and it gets crazy. Separating wheat from chaff is a good skill.

                                                          3. re: MamasCooking

                                                            And does anyone remember the old abacus to add up stuff ?????????

                                                            1. re: kevin

                                                              Is an abacus the old calculating tool with the sliding figures? I do remember those. Not using one but I think there was one on display somewhere in my elementary school. Maybe the library. As far as using the internet for actual research I did it when I was in nursing school to augment my theory lectures. I used specific medical/science/academic sites though that charged for access.

                                                              1. re: MamasCooking

                                                                Yes that's correct. Every time I went for Chinese food with my Uncle the owner of the restaurant was using a abacus. Late 50's. I haven't seen one in use in decades.

                                                                Google grants for non profits and their Adwords program led to a great deal of research at one point in my career. But I recall using the search engine Alta Vista (now Yahoo) for most of my early online surfing.

                                                                  1. re: kevin

                                                                    Yes, that's the one. When was the last time you saw an abacus in use?

                                                                    1. re: HillJ

                                                                      Probably the last time I saw one used was back when the dinosaurs roamed the earth.

                                        2. re: HillJ

                                          I use FB to keep in touch with old friends from high school, work, college etc. I don't have many I don't know offline. There are a few people i'm "friends" with but don't know in person. However, they are usually some kind of connection from a real live friend. Bc of FB we were able to rehome our baby kittens when all else completely failed. I connected a few friends with employment. I also notice others asking computer help questions and other random questions for help. I also keep in touch with relatives and friends overseas. with a 5 yr old at home as he is in school only part time, it's a good way for me to keep up with friends. Getting on the phone or emailing can get exhausting. I also get to see friends kids pictures and other images I think I'd otherwise probably won't see. My friend passed away last year from cancer and she was basically on FB for her last year bc she was in bed and didn't have the energy to see others in person.

                                          Facebook is for every age but mostly older than younger now. the younger kids may have a FB account but probably more active on instagram and snapchat. I know my in laws and older demographics are jumping on bc it's easy. they're retired and it's a good way for them to connect.

                                          you can also tailor your posts. you don't have to announce your engagement or share your pics with everyone. you can make groups or pick and choose.

                                          1. re: trolley

                                            Wow trolley that's a good deal of reasons you're using FB. If it works for you and those you care about, cool.

                                            I've done all the things you describe using other means of communication and saw no reason to add FB to the list. As I have described already on this entire thread.

                                            One things for sure, fans of FB take the "fan" part to heart!

                                            1. re: HillJ

                                              it works for me especially as a mom to a young child. I can't sit and email individuals bc I don't have the energy or time. nor am i interested in sending a group email and bcc'ing everyone bc some people don't want to share email addresses with people they don't know. I text and FB. I think some comedian said talking on the phone with someone with a child is like talking to someone with tourettes. i don't mean to make fun of people with tourettes but my son seems to have urgent needs the moment i get on the phone to talk. FB is a one shot deal in many ways. it's on my terms as well as yours. win win for this mom. I did think about deleting my account but I recently moved a to a new state and I miss my old friends. But I still get to see them via FB. Not a bad thing.

                                              1. re: trolley

                                                Exactly. My family is fragmented all over the place. All are younger and have busy lives none of them have time to sit and Skype or chit chat so posting updates....pics...news on FB that then comes right onto my news feed is great. And vice versa for all of them. One stop shopping so to speak:) Get all the family news on one feed!

                                                1. re: MamasCooking

                                                  The same time spent typing, reading and uploading photos on CH I can make/take 3 Skype calls from my niece away at college.

                                                  It seems to take the same amount of time for us. It's only a different way of communicating. But what I like about it is even if we aren't in the same room, at least we still make time for each other.

                                                  Everyone's busy these days is such an over used reason for comfortably relying on other methods of staying in touch. I like to actually see & hear from family & friends. We make the time.

                                                  Different strokes, MamasC.

                                      2. re: Veggo

                                        Veggo - and you would be largely right. I use it to keep in touch with farflung friends but also have the privacy set fairly high. too many idjits snattering.

                                        1. re: hill food

                                          My friends know how and when to communicate useful information. We don't care about pictures or stories of last night's meal.

                                            1. re: hill food

                                              Cute critter pics are OK! No salad photos. please!

                                            2. re: Veggo

                                              Yes, please spare me the Facebook Twitter-like updates.

                                          1. re: Veggo

                                            Oh it is, Veggo. It really is. But also a bit of fun too.

                                            1. re: Gio

                                              I've probably learned more about a wide, WIDE range of subjects there than anywhere. With the CH group I see more when I see them on FB. And some food topics that don't really get attention on CH - maybe a great stir fry! - brings it to the forefront for me. I'm not a WFD participant usually so get to see things that I wouldn't ordinarily.

                                    2. Yes I have Facebook. Yes I use it wayyyy too much. I'm only Facebook friends with one person from Chowhound, though.

                                      12 Replies
                                      1. re: SaraAshley

                                        Which is really what my OP was about and not whether you use or don't or like or dislike. I have a handful of FB friends that I've interacted with on CH for the seven or so years I've been here. I enjoy knowing them more multi-dimensionally ? than "just" food. And I can't remember posting pictures on food on FB as I will on CH.

                                        1. re: c oliver

                                          How do you identify yourselves on FB so you know it's a CH? Do you use the same s/n or do you email each other first? How does that work? Also, since a FB button appears on nearly every CH page how does that fit in while using CH?

                                          1. re: HillJ

                                            That's interesting about the FB "like" button on CH. I've never used it. But I'm guessing if I read something I like on CH and want to share it on FB I just hit "like" and write something. I tried it and it wouldn't post unless I wrote something. For instance, I have several friends who can outcook me any day of the week. But they're not on CH. So I could "like" and they would see that. What I've done in the past is copy a link and email to them. Maybe I'll try this.

                                            All my FB friends use their real names so that made connecting the CH ones pretty easy. If they wanted to 'friend' me, they would send a message and give their CH and real name. I've actually gotten much closer to these people via FB than I ever could on CH. That's not a criticism of CH but it's not the nature of their beast. One friend's wife got a HUGE promotion and I'd never have known about that on CH (and that's how it should be).

                                            I LOVE people and quickly fall into 20 questions mode if given the chance :) Getting to know more about my fave CHs is just nice. Nothing complicated.

                                            1. re: c oliver

                                              Well, when you describe FB that way, it sounds really nice.

                                            1. re: kevin

                                              I started emailing with this person, so that's how we became fb friends. I'm not opposed to being fb friends with other people from CH, but I don't go looking up anyone or anything either.

                                              1. re: SaraAshley

                                                also, hope this doesn't sound wrong but there are more members of the general community on FB than on more super-specific CH.

                                                  1. re: kevin

                                                    Goes without saying :) But it's alright if the "twain" meet!

                                                      1. re: kevin

                                                        twain? well I'd hope you're not just scanning things with OCR and pasting/posting.

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