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Sep 23, 2013 02:45 AM

Snookered by tasteless low fat products. Growl.

I bought a large jar of Dukes mayo and made a tuna sandwich. It was tasteless and it sucked. While sleuthing out the cause of this calamity, I noticed I had bought Dukes low fat. I plan to make a large batch of killer pimento cheese dip early in the week, so I made a second trip to buy real mayo. Now I have a huge jar of low fat Dukes Mayo, and I can't find anyone who wants It. I don't enjoy "lite" beer, either. It also sucks.
Anyone else not aboard the low-fat train of mediocrity? I won't even mention low fat ice cream. Or low fat cheese. Cheese mouse growls.

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  1. oh Veggo you knew better. we ALL knew you knew better.

    surely there's some useful use for the LF sludge.

    1 Reply
    1. re: hill food

      hair conditioner, covering water rings on wood tables, removing sticky labels, relieving sunburn....

    2. You also have to be careful because some low fat products contain more sugar to make up for flavor loss.

      54 Replies
      1. re: dfrostnh

        That's been my experience with LF products.

        The easiest way to use full fat products in a low fat way is to simply use less of it. The best way (vs. the easiest) is to make one's own.

          1. re: C. Hamster

            This is my experience as well which I try to share with others. I'd rather go full fat than exchange for carbs, especially randomly added unnecessary ones.

          2. re: dfrostnh

            And crud like modified food starch and gums. I got off the low fat train 15 years ago, got healthier and food tastes good again.

            1. re: dfrostnh

              What flavor is lost when replacing soy bean oil with water?

              My problem with Veggo's complaint is that the main ingredient that is missing in a lower fat mayo is the lest flavorful one, the oil. Salt, vinegar, even the eggs contribute flavor. The oil is virtually flavorless. It does contribute to the body and texture in a way that water plus stabilizers can't, but that isn't flavor, at least not flavor as I define it.

              1. re: paulj

                I buy the Bumble Bee tuna packed in oil. The stuff in water is tasteless to me. I guess I like oil, Paul.

                1. re: Veggo

                  I like to have the option.

                  Sometimes I want to have oil with my tuna, sometimes I don't.

                  But when I'm at the market, I don't always know which it is, or will be.

                  And tuna is something that I often will want to have on a whim and a lark.

                  And it's also not something I'm going to make a special trip to the market for.

                  So, I just buy the tuna packed in water. Then I can decide, when it's time to decide.

                  1. re: ipsedixit

                    I looked in my pantry. 6 cans of tuna packed in oil, 2 cans packed in water. 7 tins/ 3 brands of octopus, 1 cuttlefish, 1 baby eels ($$$), all in oil.

                    1. re: Veggo

                      I always buy the same number of cans of tuna packed in oil as I buy of tuna packed in water. One of each mixed with mayo and a bit of salt and pepper, and I'm good for my tuna-finch sandwiches.

                      1. re: LindaWhit

                        I haven't tried the mix-and-match. For a while I didn't find the Bumble Bee in oil, either in FL or TX, and I wondered if they are phasing it out. Most shelf space goes to the water packed or the dry pouches I know nothing about and don't care to.

                        1. re: Veggo

                          I usually buy the Genova solid light tuna in oil (Chicken of the Sea brand), and Trader Joe's solid white tuna in water. Since the Genova is sold at Trader Joe's (I'm pretty sure it still is sold there), it's easy for me to stock up.

                          I agree - I don't want the pouch tuna either.

                  2. re: Veggo

                    That's because fat is flavor, it makes flavor last in your mouth, it spreads it.

                    1. re: mcf

                      I quite enjoy tuna in water, also then I can add what I want. Tuna in oil tastes like well a little tuna in a lot of oil but these are clearly personal preferences.

                      1. re: fldhkybnva

                        I've spoiled us. Lately I've been ordering Ortiz Bonito del Norte tuna. Line caught Spanish tuna packed in olive oil. We don't make tuna salad really ever. Use this as is or mix with some red onion, capers, cilantro, s&p. Crazy good. Expensive but I recently got a case of 30 from Zingermans for half off with free shipping. I'm set for a LONG time.

                    2. re: Veggo

                      Solid tuna is older tuna and does not have the fat that younger tuna has. Solid packed in water is dry/fatless tuna in (non-fat) water. Solid packed in oil makes the tuna have more flavor. I don't have to add mayonnaise when making tuna salad.

                      Calorie count per 2 oz serving is a difference of 20.


                    3. re: paulj

                      I don't think it's what missing but rather what's added. At least in mayo, it seems to be sugar which changes the taste entirely for me.

                      1. re: paulj

                        I just went to the Hellman's site (the taste is similar to Duke, IMO) and it looks like the taste alteration is about the proportion of the ingredients (I'm guessing there are fewer eggs as well as less oil in the "low fat", plus in the case of the Hellman's Light Mayo, sorbic acid and modified corn and potato starch are added (neither the starches nor the sorbic acid are in the regular mayo). That could henky up the taste.

                        As for tuna, I find the tuna in oil makes the tuna taste "fishier" (which is a plus to me); maybe the fat molecules hold the invisible taste ghosties better than the water molecules?)

                        1. re: pinehurst

                          I find Hellman's, my life long favorite, disgusting now, full fat I mean. It has a motor oil heaviness and taste of not such good soybean oil. I gave it up for good.

                          1. re: mcf

                            Time for a 3000 mile oil change.

                            1. re: mcf

                              I've been using Duke's (findable in small jars for a buck in the dollar stores around here)--a worthy mayo for the price, and it is Hellmanns-y (the way I remember the Hellmanns of my youth to be).

                              Sorry to hear of the decline in taste; is the olive oil version of Hellmanns any better?

                              1. re: pinehurst

                                I didn't find the olive oil vers. tasty at all. It tasted and smelled wrong. I don't see why the original recipe needs to be messed with, it's perfect as is.

                                1. re: HillJ

                                  My tastebuds say they did mess with it, or I got a rancid jar with a fresh date.

                                  1. re: mcf

                                    Honestly mcf, I think it just comes down to individual preferences. Folks say that cilantro tastes like soap, never experienced that.

                                    So we all gotta do what makes us happy :)

                                    1. re: HillJ

                                      HJ, if cilantro is like soap... how do I say this delicately...perhaps it could aid with your itchy scalp problem?...:)

                                      1. re: Veggo

                                        Aren't you a dear.

                                        Cilantro tastes like a spicy herb to me V, not soap. I understand for other folks it tastes like soap.

                                        1. re: HillJ

                                          I understand for other folks it tastes like soap.

                                          :::Raising my hand::: I dislike even having to handle it from my CSA as the smell gets on my hands. But the taste (to me) is far worse.

                                          1. re: LindaWhit

                                            Bingo, LW! You are one of those lovely "folks" I was recalling.

                                              1. re: C. Hamster

                                                LOL! I gave yesterday's stanky stuff to one of my CSA co-sharers. She'll eat it. ;-)

                                          2. re: Veggo

                                            You still referring to my math skills? Aren't you adorable.

                                            1. re: HillJ

                                              Now you have induced the quadratic equation to ricochet around my cranium for a few hours.....thanks a lot...!

                                              1. re: Veggo

                                                You have only yourself to blame

                                                1. re: HillJ

                                                  I outsource blame. And little veggo's whereabouts in Quintana Roo is for the moment unaccounted for, so he is a cat of interest.

                                            2. re: Veggo

                                              Funny. Mayo is a great conditioner for hair. Your comment reminded me of that. I wonder if you could use the low fat mayo as conditioner?

                                              Realized many people suggested that further down the thread

                                              1. re: Kalivs

                                                I suppose I'm pleased to have the option. I turned 61 last Monday and I still have a full head of hair!

                                                1. re: Veggo

                                                  You may find some use for that awful mayo afterall!

                                                  1. re: HillJ

                                                    I dunno.... I don't think real men put mayonnaise in their hair on purpose....just sayin'. If SHE says so, I'll listen.

                                                      1. re: HillJ

                                                        I'll try it tomorrow morning and report back. I don't want anyone I know in town to have knowledge of this.

                                                        1. re: C. Hamster

                                                          I have to admit ... I just don't like mayo.

                                                          Of whatever kind.

                                                          Full-fat, low-fat, non-fat, whatever.

                                                          Give me Miracle Whip!

                                                          1. re: ipsedixit

                                                            Beat me, Miracle Whip me, break out the leather baby!

                                                2. re: HillJ

                                                  Well, yabbut, I've been eating and loving nothing but Hellman's my whole life. Til now.

                                                  1. re: mcf

                                                    Or Best Foods as it's called on the Left Coast.

                                                      1. re: HillJ

                                                        Who'm I to argue about individual preference? I had the same problem with another favorite, Ojai Cook. C'est la vie. :-)

                                                        1. re: mcf

                                                          I feel the same way. Live & let live Mayo!

                                                  2. re: mcf

                                                    Yes, there is a strong rancid taste in jarred mayo.

                                                    1. re: mcf

                                                      they did change the recipe....they added water.

                                                  3. re: pinehurst

                                                    I don't know; they're all in plastic now so I'm not interested. I took some CHers advice and tried TJ's organic mayo in glass, it's the current household favorite. Even organic Ojai Cook, which I used to love, has intensely heavy soybean oil feel and off taste.

                                                    1. re: mcf

                                                      Hellman's was our go-to but for several years it's been TJ's organic. We like the flavor although sometimes even It seems too rich and heavy.

                                              2. re: paulj

                                                aside from the flavor of oil, all fat has the "mouth feel" of fat which everyone likes.

                                                when i took my first job as a private chef, i really didn't know how to cook. i covered my rear by adding as much saturated fat to every dish as it would hold. my employers thought i was "genius in the kitchen."
                                                little did they know.

                                              3. re: dfrostnh

                                                They also contain a lot of guar gum for texture, and that has a really nasty aftertaste.

                                              4. Highest and best use is probably as a furniture polish.

                                                Better get a cup of coffee before your next shopping foray. Otherwise you might pick up oleo instead of butter next time.

                                                The shame.

                                                5 Replies
                                                1. re: INDIANRIVERFL

                                                  Actually mayo is touted as being good to remove sap from things. Seasonally that's a big deal for us as our deck sits under a big Sugar Pine tree.

                                                  1. re: c oliver

                                                    Hair conditioner. Altho' full-fat probably works better for that, too.

                                                    1. re: pine time

                                                      Light beer works as a good clarifying rinse as well - I use cheap beer that people bring to parties for that.

                                                    2. re: c oliver

                                                      Has to be full-fat, though, as it's the oil that works.

                                                      1. re: Isolda

                                                        Ah, thanks. Sounds like the voice of experience :)

                                                  2. There you go Veg. Send the offending jar off to C Oliver. She can polish her deck.

                                                    1 Reply
                                                    1. re: Gio

                                                      Like! And the dogs aren't discriminating at all so they'd REALLY like :)

                                                    2. When people use the term "low fat" I just assume they are talking about my ankles.