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May 18, 2013 02:31 AM

Biggest Cooking Show Pet Peeves

I can't stand it when they are cutting jalapenos and have to go into the whole speech about how the seeds and the rib are the hottest part. We know, you've told us that "tip" 10,000+ times already. It reminds me of Ghost Hunters, where in every single episode they cut to a clip of one of the cast members explaining what an "EVP" is.

I absolutely HATE the phrases "ooey gooey" and "crispy crunchy". Not only are they stupidly redundant, but you could practically start a drinking game around them while watching Food Network.

Stop acting like you're having a full blown orgasm every time you take a bite of something. People don't even get that overly emotional in actual pornos. In fact, if I'm trying to enjoy some food item, the last thing I want stuck in my head is a visual of you rubbing one out. Just stop it.

Stick to cooking techniques and actual food expertise, I really don't care about the life and times of (insert celebrity chef here). I can care less about some long winded personal back story you have for the recipe, it's not all about you, get over yourself. Can you imagine going to a cooking school and the instructors spent the whole time talking about themselves instead?

For the love of god, will someone please tell Giada to stop over-pronouncing any word that is remotely Italian. There's nothing authentic about her doing that, it's annoying and she sounds like an idiot. While we're at it, will someone please hide the amaretto cookies and moscarpone cheese from her?

Will someone explain to "aunt Sandy" that nobody would be impressed or fooled by one of her crappy doctored up angel food cakes. If I had a friend like her, the only reason I would be showing up at her dinner parties was for the booze, not her cooking.

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  1. I would like to be shown a knife skill that is not "curl your fingers while you're chopping", which is kind of "duh" at this point.

    I'm no Rachael Ray fan, but she at least washes her hands - it wouldn't hurt anyone else to do that from time to time.

    I'd like a show that was more than "Here's how to make this recipe" with the phony "I'm having guests for dinner!" then a fuzzy picking-flowers/farmer's market/wine shop montage. That's what bothers me about the Next Food Network show - they were all basically the same show, only with different personalities. "I'm punk rock/nerdy/Southern/sassy!" I don't care as much about the "personalities" as I do about the food. Teach us how to sharpen a knife, pick out a good tomato, trim a pork tenderloin - don't take me to your favorite ________ restaurant, then back to your kitchen to recreate that meal.

    Ditto on the orgasm comment - I would like to try that at my house some time: "Every body dig in!" (Chomp) "Mmmmmmmmmm! Oooooooooaaaaahhhhh!"

    While Giada doesn't do it for me, she eats like she just learned how and isn't very good at it, which cracks me up - lots of head bobbing and visible teeth.

    3 Replies
    1. re: NonnieMuss

      I have quit watching the Food Channel. I got thoroughly tired of it about 5+ years ago.

      1. re: Candy

        Same here. Too much reality type entertainment & not enough practical instruction, especially in the evening.

        Giada's smile reminds me of a gremlin from the movie.

      2. re: NonnieMuss

        I wish they would show more shows with good chefs instructing you how to make good food. I've always felt that they need more of a variety. I'm on the west coast and would like to see more ethnic type shows, for instance, various Asian foods instead of Italian and American food. Less traveling shows such as DDD and Food Truck shows which don't do the watcher much good if it's not accessible but only to a few. And most of the restaurant review shows are in New York. Just my opinion.

      3. The shows are supposed to be entertaining as well as educational. Would you prefer a Stepford Wife, with no personality, speak in an unemotional monotone?

        1. Dude, back away from the coffee! I've become the same way, guess I've been watching cooking shows from the days of Julia Childs and Graham Kerr. Now there's at least 25 new shows and I've seen them all too. My pet peeve is when chef's/cook's bang their spoons or spatula's on the pot 3-6 times making that god awful clanging noise.
          Keep on Cooking...

          1. "For the love of god, will someone please tell Giada to stop over-pronouncing any word that is remotely Italian. There's nothing authentic about her doing that, it's annoying and she sounds like an idiot..."

            Exactly. And blabby hosts who constantly interrupt the chef while they're explaining their dish. I won't mention any names, but his initials are Jeffrey Saad. I thought Jasper White was going to throttle him at one point.

            GF's main issue is the closeups of people sticking their tongues way out as the utensil goes to mouth. Especially noticeable on Iron Chef.

            1. I watched rachel ray a few times and want to slap her every time she throws salt over her shoulder. She needs to get down and clean it up.

              I also hate the whole measuring mentality. Ina Garten...im talking to you. I understand getting out your measuring spoons when baking but it irks me to see them measuring out a teaspoon of salt when cooking. What happened to teaching people to taste as you cook? I regret watching the foodnetwork as there was a time when i couldn't cook without measuring every single thing. now that i look back...it was silly of me to grind pepper into a piece of paper and slide it into the measuring spoon.

              And seeing as they are aiming at the home cook, one thing that annoyed the hell out of me is not being specific enough, specifically wines. At least give a suggestion so i dont look like an idiot. I felt so helpless going to the wine store and asking for white wine. Chardonnay, pinot grigio, sauvignon blanc....it was a nightmare when i was learning.