37 People Who Are Worse at Cooking Than You

[juliejulez]

Whenever you make a bad dish, just read this to make yourself feel better:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/rachelysander...

[alliegator]

I just actually had to wipe away a laugh-tear. Omg, just what the...?! How?!

I don't know what it says about me that I take so much glee in the misfortune of others. Bwahaha!

[cgarner]

I give an "A" for effort to the skillet potato, cheese, ham, sour cream, gold fish dish with some sort of flecks of freshly cracked pepper (or some sort of seasoning blend from McCormicks) on top
it reminds me of a 50's homemaker type of dish

[ttoommyy]

"it reminds me of a 50's homemaker type of dish"

Check out this site!
http://www.lileks.com/institute/galle...

[iluvcookies]

Oh ttoommyy... I own a few of Lilek's books. They have me rolling on the floor.

[ttoommyy]

I can read those things over and over again and cry laughing every time!

[goodhealthgourmet]

My dear sister is an extremely smart & successful woman, but she's pretty hopeless in the kitchen. When she was in college she hosted a study group, and she decided to "make" cinnamon rolls for her guests. She bought the refrigerated Pillsbury ones, opened the can but *didn't* remove the rolls, set the can on a cookie sheet, and put it in the preheated oven...

[scubadoo97]

I guess for some the brain shuts down when being asked to cook

[Jacquilynne]

I will have them know that I have *totally* cooked pasta in a coffee maker and it works just fine, thank you very much. The person in that picture is doing it wrong -- you have to break the spaghetti in half first. It works even better for Ramen.

[Veggo]

Can you next mix in an alfredo sauce?

[Jacquilynne]

That I have not tried. But it actually seems like it'd probably work okay. Though in the era in which I cooked things in coffee pots, alfredo sauce would not really have been in the family repertoire.

[TroyTempest]

Is Sandra Lee's Kwanzaa cake in there?

[INDIANRIVERFL]

Be honest, please.

I counted 19 that I have emulated so far in my cooking.

[ttoommyy]

I can honestly say I have NEVER done any of those things. I have had a cupcake mistake or two, but nothing that comes close to anything depicted in that link.

[LindaWhit]

Agreed.

Although I am rather impressed at the atom bomb pizza.

[INDIANRIVERFL]

I freely admit to turning on an oven and forgetting the tupperware stored there. Making pasta in the dorms in a coffee pot, watching superlong pasta ignite, misshapen individual key lime pies that I tried to mold with tin foil as I do not own a muffin pan.

You have never inadvertently left the rice on and made rice cakes, or pasta cakes for that matter? Or carbonised anything? Never had an attempt to replicate or improve on a dish that didn't come out as expected?

In my 45 plus years of cooking, I am amazed that I have done so few.

[LindaWhit]

The only thing I can recall carbonizing / melting is a 3 qt. Farberware pot. I forgot to put the water into the bottom when I put in a steamer to steam broccoli or green beans. Turned on the heat, went into the computer, and a bit later, smelled the melting stainless steel on hot electric coils. Luckily, it just went into the drip tray and on the coil. All easily replaced. And technically, no food was harmed in the melting of the pot.

The only thing that are stored in my oven are the racks and the pizza stone. :-)

[ttoommyy]

" Never had an attempt to replicate or improve on a dish that didn't come out as expected?"

That is a lot different than most of the 37 examples shown in the link.

[INDIANRIVERFL]

Very true. I am specifically thinking of the variations on smores. And I remember somebody adding the liquid to the dry fudge in a jar to the jar and putting it in the oven.

If I can't laugh at myself, who can I laugh at?

[Chemicalkinetics]

I have done many, but they didn't fail like those in the link.

I have flipped foods like #3, but my handle never came off.
I have directly baked pizza on racks as #5-#7, but they never melted like the way they did.
I have made a mess of my waffle iron, but probably nowhere like #17
I am sure I have set foods on fire like #20, but I cannot remember what or when
Exploding microwave I have done (#25, #26)

[kengk]

I have cooked a frozen pizza with the cardboard circle still under it and roasted a turkey with the plastic bag of giblets still inside.

Neither caused too much problem.

[alliegator]

I've done pizza with the cardboard on the bottom, too.
And I've melted he bottom of a bottle of chinese five spice to a burner, then picked it up and it went everywhere. Every time I use my dustbuster, you can still smell it.

[sunshine842]

oh, yes - the mistake that never lets you forget it.

[Bryan Pepperseed]

I don't own a waffle iron, so about three for me:

1) Electric burners left on low by accident can leave some nice grooves in plastic items ..... in my case, the bottom of my favorite colander.
2) Discovered not long ago that even already baked (and cut open) potatoes can explode in the microwave when reheating.
3) While not as severe, I can testify that even after starting a pizza on a stone at the bottom of the oven, "minor blowouts" can still occasionally occur if you try to achieve "top browning" by transferring it to the top rack under the broiler too soon.

[Lillipop]

What was the person smoking who did #19 the electric plastic tea kettle on top of a stove burner? Impressive:)

[seamunky]

#19 electric tea kettle on the gas stove has got to be the worst!

[cresyd]

When I was 5 or so, I tried to boil water by putting it into a metal tea kettle and putting that into the microwave.

Lesson learned!

[celesul]

So, you see, you're *assuming* that everyone should know better than this.

...I could see my mom managing many of these mishaps...

[suzigirl]

Wow. Those are some epic fails. Man do I think that was great for my ego

[Chemicalkinetics]

Some of them aren't really that bad like the video of "3". As far as I can tell, the handle came off with no fault from the cook. Is number 18 that bad? It worked. I thought number 36 is very artistic.

[tcamp]

Yeah, #3 happened to a roommate of mine. I particularly like that two overflowing trash cans in that video.

[ricepad]

Picture 30 might actually be intentional...might be tempura shiso.

[LindaWhit]

I'm just sitting at my desk snort-giggling right now!

[Violatp]

Huh. I just called myself a serviceable cook to someone. I'm going back to them and UPGRADING.

[JerryMe]

Ok - I feel MUCH, MUCH better about my cooking skills, now. Thanks for sharing that JulieJulez! The clean up alone! Like the cookie sheet that melted in the oven!?! I think the stove would be a goner.

[Kontxesi]

Was that even a cookie sheet? How does that even happen?

[sunshine842]

I think it was the plastic tray that the pieces of cookie dough were in when they were bought.

(but where the disconnect between hot oven=melted plastic happens is beyond me...)

[ttoommyy]

"(but where the disconnect between hot oven=melted plastic happens is beyond me...)"

The plastic trays that Lean Cuisine frozen meals come in go into the oven.

[sunshine842]

but those aren't translucent, nor do they include any instructions to place cookies on a cookie sheet.

(sorry, maybe I'm leaning toward the tin-hat club, but I try not to put plastic in the oven)

[ttoommyy]

...nor do they include any instructions to place cookies on a cookie sheet."

Not everyone reads instructions, hence the 37 mistakes in the link the OP has provided. :)

[sunshine842]

yes, but at some point one would think that "plastic+heat=mess" would enter someone's mind.

But having worked in a lot of technical support departments (for consumer and industrial goods), you really cannot ever assume that people will ever use that spongy thing sloshing around in their skull.

[ttoommyy]

I use my brain all the time but it occasionally backfires on me. Not so much in the kitchen but other areas of the house. I can see people doing many of the things on that list. We all make mistakes and bad judgment calls.

[512window]

While making me Mothers Day breakfast in bed one year, my two kids achieved something very similar to this one. They made me toast but they had only cooked things in the microwave before. You always put your food on a plate in the microwave. So they opened the toaster oven, put in a plastic plate, put the bread on the plate, and started it up.

I took a picture too! This was well before pinterist and facebook so it must be a universal human reaction.

[rasputina]

wow, those are horrid.

As for the pizzas, they either thawed them first or put them in a cold oven not a preheated one. I've never had a problem cooking frozen pizza directly on the rack. But you have to put it in a preheated oven and it has to be fully frozen when you do.

The cookies with the weird melted goo freaked me out.

[kengk]

Hilarious but some of those look pretty tasty. The Smore and the melted cheese balls for two.

[sunshine842]

yep-- sometimes it tastes good, even if it's not very pretty....

[Kontxesi]

With those pizzas... I wonder if they let them thaw before putting them in the oven?

But those smores cookies. I could see that happening to me.

[CanadaGirl]

I can't figure out why the s'mores failed so colossally...

[Jacquilynne]

It seems like the cookie dough didn't have enough structure to hold the graham cracker in place once the marshmallow got slippery. The top wafer slid off to the side and took the cookie dough on top of it and the marshmallows with it. So then it was just kind of a molten lump with chocolate in the middle of it.

[DuchessNukem]

Lol. Wonderful. I have personally done variants on both the cupcakes and the micro spaghetti squash.

[iluvcookies]

Oh dear lord... even before I learned to cook I never did anything that bad.
I know some boxed pizzas say to put them directly on the oven rack, but the pictures here show exactly why I never do it.

[PotatoHouse]

At least one of those HAD to be my first ex-wife!!

[Tripeler]

I looked at the article and in a way it is a bit sad -- seeing the misfortunes of others as a way to make yourself feel better.

[iluvcookies]

This doesn't make me feel better, but I am surprised at what happens. I'm not laughing, but I do think WTF? How did they think this wsa a good idea? And why take a picture of it?

[LindaWhit]

I don't "feel better" - but I *do* think "WTH were they thinking putting plastic under the cookies in the oven? And I *am* laughing - if people put these pics up there for all to see, they know they weren't the brightest bulbs in the box to have gone wrong in their cooking.

[juliejulez]

Lighten up, it's supposed to be funny :)

[ttoommyy]

"I looked at the article and in a way it is a bit sad -- seeing the misfortunes of others as a way to make yourself feel better."

These people all probably posted these pictures themselves for a laugh. These cooking "accidents" are not misfortunes; they are mistakes. No one need feel sad or bad for chuckling at them.

[cresyd]

Those pizza photos are amazing.

[Spartanguy]

How do you set pasta on fire?

[chileheadmike]

And why do you take a picture of it instead of putting it out?

[Kontxesi]

We are in the age of Instagram and Twitter! Pics or it didn't happen. ;)

[scubadoo97]

Or how to get a lot of hits by posting a staged mess? Don't put it past some and if you've ever watched Tosh you know that to get some attention people will do some pretty amazingly dumb things

[ttoommyy]

I thought the exact same thing when I looked at many of them.

[ttoommyy]

What is #1 supposed to be? I'm mesmerized by it!

[scubadoo97]

I had a flash back

[seamunky]

I think #1 is rainbow cake in a jar

http://www.tablespoon.com/recipes/rai...

[ttoommyy]

Thanks seamunky. Now I'm mesmerized by THOSE! So colorful, so cheesy, so cool!

[cgarner]

if you have a gas stove, and the flame is on high, and you don't push the pasta into the water, but instead let it hang over the side of the pot, the flames will heat up the dry pasta hanging over and thusly they will combust and burst into flames
(not that I have experienced that first hand or anything..)
wink wink, nod nod