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Hilarious spoof on Williams Sonoma Catalog

r
Rasam Nov 14, 2012 04:32 PM

http://deadspin.com/5959212

I laughed-till-cried reading this, especially the ones about the Hungarian sacks, set-of-two potato scrubber gloves, and $74 biscuits.

These are real products from W-S!

Any other examples of seasonal humour to share?

  1. s
    SheilaGirl Feb 2, 2013 04:52 AM

    "All I have in my pantry is flour and gum" made me laugh far more than it should!

    1. TheCarrieWatson Jan 9, 2013 04:41 PM

      That is just hilarious. I was at my Mom's for thanksgiving this year, thumbing through the holiday WS catalog. I had no real preconceived ideas about WS at this point, BTW. But a few minutes into it, I found myself getting more and more annoyed. I think the breaking point for me were the All-Clad "Turkey Forks" or something. Just made me angry. Good thing I didn't get to those Potato Washing gloves or the 70.00 biscuits.

      1. ritabwh Nov 27, 2012 09:43 PM

        thank you for sharing. this was so fun to read.
        and it's hard and sad to think that WS started out in the hippie-dippie days of SF.

        1. i
          INDIANRIVERFL Nov 27, 2012 03:03 PM

          Ebelskiver pans. To be found in most thrift stores in the northern midwest. For less than $10. I think I will store it next to my couscous maker I got in the 80s. Behind the rosette maker from the 70s.

          All required wedding gifts in the Skandinavian midwest.

          1. alkapal Nov 18, 2012 10:54 PM

            cool idea for kitchen twine -- cheaper than w-s

             
            6 Replies
            1. re: alkapal
              sunshine842 Nov 18, 2012 11:28 PM

              heh -- and here I just stick mine in a ziplock and seal it with a tail sticking out of the bag. (but that's cuter)

              1. re: sunshine842
                alkapal Nov 19, 2012 12:41 AM

                you are fancier than i am. mine just gets a rubber band. haha! your idea is better. love those plastic bags!

                1. re: alkapal
                  sunshine842 Nov 19, 2012 01:45 AM

                  and ANYTHING is better than having that damned string running around and partying in the drawer when it's closed.

                  That's the only explanation I can think of for how one ball of string can tangle itself in so many things in a drawer that's been closed for days.

                  1. re: sunshine842
                    alkapal Nov 19, 2012 03:12 AM

                    it gets together with the twist ties! they party hard.

                    1. re: alkapal
                      b
                      breadchick Dec 26, 2012 06:37 PM

                      Haha, late to the reply here, but that cracked me up.

              2. re: alkapal
                k
                ksbee Nov 21, 2012 10:40 AM

                Love it! and the ideas below - I just slip my spool o' twine over the handle of the meat pounder, but the end does go crazy in the cabinet.

              3. s
                sisterfunkhaus Nov 18, 2012 11:15 AM

                That was awesome. Thanks for sharing. I haven't laughed that hard in a while.

                1. HillJ Nov 18, 2012 10:58 AM

                  "Anyway, I paid for this grater with a credit card. And when a place like Williams-Sonoma gets your credit card and thus your address, you are on the mailing list for life." snip-
                  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                  words to live by...

                  favorite quote: "W-S aren't the least bit self-conscious about getting you to pay $35 for mailed gravy."

                  10 Replies
                  1. re: HillJ
                    Chemicalkinetics Nov 18, 2012 11:19 AM

                    <favorite quote: "W-S aren't the least bit self-conscious about getting you to pay $35 for mailed gravy.">

                    I was wondering about the writers for the catalogs. My guess is that most of them do not have extreme high income. How do they feel about writing stuffs like this. How do they convince people to buy products which they themselves probably won't buy. How do you make something sound exciting to others, when you yourself hate it.

                    http://youtu.be/YZukEEqnCcE?t=3m1s

                    1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                      HillJ Nov 18, 2012 11:38 AM

                      Irregardless of income or readers sensibilities, when you are paid to write, you write what's required. Sales & marketing 101. Buyer beware 102.

                      1. re: HillJ
                        Chemicalkinetics Nov 18, 2012 11:45 AM

                        <when you are paid to write, you write what's required>

                        I understand which is why I wonder how they feel about it. Anyway, tough jobs must be.

                        1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                          HillJ Nov 18, 2012 11:45 AM

                          How they feel about it may be best displayed by spoofs such as the OP posted above...but, have you been in a W-S? Many sales people are walking, talking proud W-S spokespeople who believe very strongly in the company's mission and products. They are usually wearing a well starched apron, carrying samples of W-S jarred foods for you to try while selling you a $400.00 stew pot.

                      2. re: Chemicalkinetics
                        HillJ Nov 18, 2012 11:42 AM

                        where's the SNL skit come into play for you, Chem?

                        1. re: HillJ
                          Chemicalkinetics Nov 18, 2012 11:54 AM

                          I picked the skit because of the phrase "I will hate it" -- as in the writers for the WS catalog probably were thinking: "I will hate to promote this $35 mailed in gravy"

                          I am sure the sales have to partially believe in the company mission, why else would they work there. As mentioned above, I don't think everything Williams Sonoma sell are useless. Many of the items can be found in other stores as well. However, once awhile there are just something really crazy. For example, the $25 caramel apple which by the way is the Top 10 suggested gift:

                          http://www.williams-sonoma.com/produc...

                          I just have to wonder -- who come up with the idea to promote a $25 caramel apple as the top 10 best food gift from Williams Sonoma. I wanted to ask its marketing department "What exactly is the definition of 'BEST' here?"

                          1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                            HillJ Nov 18, 2012 12:19 PM

                            I suppose the same could be said of a jewelry store, Chem. And fwiw, the idea that a $25.00 caramel apple would appeal to anyone falls under the "if I paid alot for IT, IT must be good!" category for shoppers of all types.

                            Wax philosophical...the sales prowess of any company comes down to appealing to the very nature of what people want over what they need.

                            1. re: HillJ
                              Chemicalkinetics Nov 18, 2012 12:33 PM

                              Yeah, I see what you are getting. I guess, to me, jewelries are meant to be luxury items. A jewelry store does not pretend to be anything but that, and people going into a jewelry store also know. Should they spend that money? That is their choice. In other words, everyone is on the same page.

                              A $25 caramel to me go against the normal theme for a caramel apple. Did you read the Williams Sonoma chicken coop? $600 for the normal rustic chicken coop, and $760 for the chicken coop with a chicken painting. $600 for a chicken coop is already expensive, but what really killed me is that the additional of a chicken painting costs an extra $160. Really? That painting really worth $160?

                              http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/1854g...

                              There is something wrong about selling common, down to earth products and promote them into luxury items. I think that is why the $35 gravy (or the famous $100 hamburger) bug me more than a $10,000 diamond ring. Look, I am not losing sleep over this, and I find these funny, but I also find something wrong about them.

                              1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                HillJ Nov 18, 2012 12:45 PM

                                Ha! No sleep lost here either Chem. Just two 'hounds shooting the breeze.

                      3. re: HillJ
                        j
                        JudiAU Nov 27, 2012 03:44 PM

                        BTW- the awfullness of that gravy inspired two things, this post: http://chowhound.chow.com/topics/656211 and the fact that at 39w pregnant it was worth it to me to make my turkey stock so I could make decent gravy on top of the leftovers

                      4. chowdom Nov 17, 2012 08:30 PM

                        Thank you that was very entertaining...um has anyone read the comments section....rubio for her in particular? Might be one of the funniest things I have ever read!

                        1 Reply
                        1. re: chowdom
                          chowdom Nov 18, 2012 05:18 PM

                          Reading this thread jogged my memory. About fifteen years ago I was invited to a friends parents home Christmas Eve for dinner. I ordered the "Willie cake" from the WS catalog. It was a dark chocolate/espresso number covered in ganache and served 18 - 20. I brought the cake with me in the box it had been shipped in. To say I was horrified when the hostess removed the cake from the box would be an understatement. My Willie cake looked like a large pancake. The cost of the Willie cake $85.00.

                        2. tim irvine Nov 15, 2012 05:05 PM

                          This makes me nostalgic. There used to be a cool kitchen store in San Francisco, up the hill from Union Square. They had scads of heavy tinned lined copper, the old Thiers Issard Nogent knives, a wall of tinned molds, the painted Pillivuyt terrine that looked like a hare, and gorgeous maple cutting boards and tables. The guy who ran it, Chuck, was obviously striving to create a bright happy Dehillerin clone. I think he sold out to some folks who are more into an upscale version of Pier 1. Sigh.

                          1 Reply
                          1. re: tim irvine
                            cosmogrrl Nov 19, 2012 12:52 AM

                            They have a nice plaque where that store used to be!

                          2. Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 03:49 PM

                            So no one find the rustic chicken coop funny? I thought that one is probably the funniest item. It isn't so much about being useless or overpriced, but who would buy a chicken coop from Williams Sonoma? Won't I buy a real chicken coop from a professional maker or seller?

                            http://www.chickencoopsource.com/?source=googleaw&kwid=chicken%20coop&tid=exact&gclid=CJ3NypmT0rMCFQWe4AodWjIAlg

                            Now, the pricing is expensive compared to a typical chicken coop too, but the painted option is just insane. $600 for a plain chicken coop. $760 for a chicken coop with a painted chicken. Really? That painted chicken worth $160?

                            http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/1854g...

                            I think my neighbor kids can forget about the whole summer lemonade sale.

                            2 Replies
                            1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                              Bacardi1 Nov 15, 2012 04:01 PM

                              If you think the chicken coops are outrageous, take a gander at the extra "Predator Protection Kit". It contains a roll of hardware cloth & some staples & nails - all for a mere $79.95 - LOL!!! I used to raise fancy chickens for quite a few years, simply as pets & for eggs, so I particularly find this stuff utterly laughable.

                              http://www.williams-sonoma.com/produc...

                              1. re: Bacardi1
                                Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 04:39 PM

                                I don't know anything about chicken fence, so I am comparing to this site:

                                http://www.fencing-farm-ranch.com/fencing7.html

                                Their 2' x 24' is about $20, and WS's exclusive chicken fence is $80.

                                Amazon has one that is only $5 with $5 shipping, but that may be too cheap?

                                http://www.amazon.com/Jackson-Wire-12...

                                P.S.: I especially find the paint of a chicken costs $160 amazing.

                            2. gaffk Nov 15, 2012 03:06 PM

                              My favorite WS product is not covered in this catalog. Last year while holiday shopping I was in the local store (yes, I have purchased some items from there . . .I will now hang my head in shame). Anyway, I notice a jar of "peppermint snow" for decorating baked goods. It was, IIRC, 11 or 12 dollars. It was also 6 oz. of crushed candy canes. That was my WS "aha" moment . . .Why was I shopping in a store that charges $11 for $0.50 worth of crushed candy canes? Even I can figure out how to pulverize a candy cane on my own to use as a topping.

                              1. m
                                mikester Nov 15, 2012 02:01 PM

                                That's awesome ! I can remember when Williams-Sonoma seemed to sell useful things at somewhat reasonable prices, but now it's mainly about "lifestyle" and image, isn't it ?

                                Can't say Sur Le Table is any better, though. I had a 50$ gift card for my birthday to SLT, and couldn't find anything that I wanted / needed for anything in that price range. I guess that's a good problem to have, right ?

                                But here's another ridiculous item - this is still being sold at Peet's Coffee stores - it's a bottle of simple syrup. They want something like seven or eight bucks, IIRC, for this little bottle of simple syrup. I feel like saying "You want how much for a solution of half water and half granulated sugar, that I could make in less than five minutes at home, for pretty much nothing ?"

                                6 Replies
                                1. re: mikester
                                  gaffk Nov 15, 2012 03:08 PM

                                  I spotted an 8 oz bottle of simple syrup at my local supermarket for $7. I suppose they count on uneducated consumers who have a recipe that calls for simple syrup and don't know how simple it really is?

                                  1. re: gaffk
                                    EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:32 PM

                                    Hey- if you need simple syrup for a recipe and have no farking idea what it is, $7 is not that much for a substitute for knowledge that you odn't want to get into. All food snobbism aside, I'm serious here.
                                    I fix computers and printers at work- do you want me to get into the same mindset that chowhounds get into about food and apply it to some of the computer 'problems' I've seen from an equally snobby platform? I may be hasty in my answer, but i don't think you would.

                                    1. re: EWSflash
                                      Justpaula Nov 27, 2012 02:25 PM

                                      I don't know that it is snobism, but I hear your point. My 66 year old mother, who is surely no tech whiz, would sooner try to fix a computer problem than make simple syrup. She is a very bright and sophisticated woman, but hates cooking. She probably doesn't even know what simple syrup is. But, I wonder if anyone who wouldn't know how to make simple syrup, or wouldn't be interested in learning how to make it, would actually ever need it. :)

                                  2. re: mikester
                                    Delucacheesemonger Nov 16, 2012 12:28 AM

                                    Just saw cane syrup in Paris for 11 euros for 375 ml.

                                    1. re: Delucacheesemonger
                                      sunshine842 Nov 22, 2012 12:10 AM

                                      step away from the Grande Epicerie -- it was 2,50 euros for 750ml at the Auchan -- bio, no less.

                                    2. re: mikester
                                      cosmogrrl Nov 19, 2012 12:49 AM

                                      I see simple syrup in my local liquor store for about $8, right next to the "margarita" salt for $6.

                                      I just wonder about people sometimes.

                                    3. iluvcookies Nov 15, 2012 01:31 PM

                                      This is my favorite line:
                                      "Two grand for a wooden table. And it's not like the surface of it is a giant iPad screen either. "
                                      Yes!!

                                      But if I am paying $40 for a jar of cranberries, Gary Oldman better come to my house and serve it to me personally.

                                      5 Replies
                                      1. re: iluvcookies
                                        Delucacheesemonger Nov 15, 2012 01:49 PM

                                        If that is happening, l will split the cost of the jar with you.

                                        1. re: iluvcookies
                                          Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 01:51 PM

                                          Gary Oldman is a kickass actor.

                                          1. re: iluvcookies
                                            b
                                            breadchick Nov 18, 2012 02:48 PM

                                            Hmm, Gary Oldman with cranberry sauce on the side. Merry Christmas to me.

                                            1. re: breadchick
                                              iluvcookies Nov 18, 2012 07:12 PM

                                              He he he... That would be one time I wouldn't care if the cranberries were from a can :)

                                              1. re: iluvcookies
                                                EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:26 PM

                                                Gary Oldman scares me. But good for you guys to see past that.

                                          2. Bacardi1 Nov 15, 2012 09:24 AM

                                            Anyone here a gardener? Check out W-S's prices for plants. Think along the lines of $12 for ONE BEET PLANT. (And other plant prices run along the same lines.) Anyone stupid enough to pay $12 for one annual vegetable plant deserves to get rooked.

                                            6 Replies
                                            1. re: Bacardi1
                                              arashall Nov 15, 2012 09:58 AM

                                              Probably a golden beet ;-)

                                              1. re: arashall
                                                Bacardi1 Nov 15, 2012 11:12 AM

                                                Lol!!! Nah - just common "Bull's Blood".

                                                1. re: Bacardi1
                                                  DuchessNukem Nov 15, 2012 11:50 AM

                                                  Lol bacardi. Got a 3-4 year old bag of beet seeds in the freezer. I sprout them; also use them in beds and growboxes. They grow like kudzu in parched 105*, frost, or in pouring rain. I had an extensive couple of weeks of beets this summer and the husband started flinching every time he saw a dish with them.

                                                  (Thought the parody was hilarious. The redneck monk fruitcake saga was the best.)

                                                  1. re: Bacardi1
                                                    Justpaula Nov 18, 2012 02:26 PM

                                                    When you say "golden beet", I sure hope you mean that it is literally made out of solid gold! I can't imagine that those genuinely interested in gardening would pay for that. I would love to see a W-S catalog's description of its gourmet "fertilizer", if you know what I mean.

                                                    1. re: Justpaula
                                                      EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:25 PM

                                                      Ha!

                                                2. re: Bacardi1
                                                  EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:24 PM

                                                  Hey- if you can get them to buy... good for you.

                                                3. Eiron Nov 15, 2012 08:47 AM

                                                  My favorite was the fruitcake.

                                                  But I'm confused by the "Waffle Batter Dispenser"....

                                                  "Williams-Sonoma says: 'Measures out uniform circles in three sizes.'"

                                                  They're waffles.

                                                  THEY'RE FREAKIN' SQUARE !!!

                                                  Now, if W-S had said, "Measures out uniform squares in three sizes," everyone on my gift list would be getting one!

                                                  2 Replies
                                                  1. re: Eiron
                                                    Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 09:13 AM

                                                    <THEY'RE FREAKIN' SQUARE !!! >

                                                    I bet the person who was put in charge of writing this section of the catalog hates his/her job, and did not even look at if the product matches the photos.

                                                    <everyone on my gift list would be getting one!>

                                                    Not me. I find those dispenser-like tool is more hassle to fill, to use, and most of all, to clean. I have a whip cream dispenser....

                                                    1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                      Eiron Nov 15, 2012 09:22 AM

                                                      You wouldn't buy something that dispenses uniform SQUARE batter??

                                                      "Great for parties!"

                                                      I'd think the only thing better than that would be a batter dispenser that measures out uniform CUBES of batter...

                                                  2. n
                                                    NE_Elaine Nov 15, 2012 06:50 AM

                                                    This was amusing - kind of a predictible rant against people that have more money than sense.

                                                    That being said, I do have a set of the potato scrubber gloves. They do a great job of scrubbing my produce so that it doesn't have to be peeled.

                                                    3 Replies
                                                    1. re: NE_Elaine
                                                      Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 07:40 AM

                                                      Williams Sonoma does offer many good, interesting and beautiful tools, but some of the items are just "What the hell?"

                                                      1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                        n
                                                        NE_Elaine Nov 15, 2012 09:19 AM

                                                        You are absolutely right! It is an interesting mix of useful and useless.

                                                        I find their food very pricey, but have to say that their Jordan Almonds are, quite possibly, the best I have ever tasted. I go to the store and pick up a couple bags when they go 50% off Easter week.

                                                      2. re: NE_Elaine
                                                        EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:22 PM

                                                        Brava, Elaine, I knew somebody had them, they look like a good idea to me too.

                                                      3. c
                                                        cleobeach Nov 15, 2012 06:18 AM

                                                        Thank you so much for the morning laugh! Some of the comments are hysterical too.

                                                        I admit to wanting one of those Ebelskiver pans but in the back of my mind, I am sure it would disappoint me.

                                                        No joke, my husband is not allowed to go to W-S unsupervised as he is a total sucker for their marketing. He would buy that pumpkin sauce AND the pumpkin bowels.

                                                        12 Replies
                                                        1. re: cleobeach
                                                          sunshine842 Nov 15, 2012 09:46 AM

                                                          *snerk* pumpkin bowels.

                                                          (I know, it's a typo - -but one of the better ones.)

                                                          yes, I'm dying to spend $40 on a bunch of bowls I'll use once a year and have to find a place to store the rest of the year -- said nobody ever.

                                                          1. re: sunshine842
                                                            Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 10:45 AM

                                                            To be honest, I agree with Drew (the writer, that the price isn't that bad really. $40 for 4 interesting bowls. The fact is that they don't have to only be used in Thanksgiving. They can be used all year around. Ok, I may not want to use them in front of my guest because that make me look stupid. But if I wake up 2AM in the morning and want a bowl of cereal. It is just between me, my cereal and my pumpkin bowl. No one needs to know.

                                                            1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                              sunshine842 Nov 15, 2012 12:24 PM

                                                              I quite like them, actually, from a strictly "pretty things" perspective -- but the lids aren't going to survive daily usage...and cleaning anything out of all of those contours would drive me batty.

                                                              From a practicality perspective? As useful as pockets in your underwear.

                                                              1. re: sunshine842
                                                                Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 12:29 PM

                                                                <cleaning anything out of all of those contours would drive me batty>

                                                                Good point.

                                                                1. re: sunshine842
                                                                  Delucacheesemonger Nov 15, 2012 01:48 PM

                                                                  You don't have pockets in your underwear ?

                                                                  1. re: Delucacheesemonger
                                                                    Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 01:52 PM

                                                                    I do, and I always keep at least a quarter there. This way, when a robber hijacks me and takes away my cloth (hopefully not my underwear), I have at least a quarter to call someone.....

                                                                    Sometime I keep a bit more because you never know if I am hungry for the vending machine...

                                                                    1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                                      sunshine842 Nov 15, 2012 02:02 PM

                                                                      :D

                                                                      1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                                        kattyeyes Nov 15, 2012 07:45 PM

                                                                        LOLOL! You'd be lucky to find a damn phone booth in this day and age. ;) Too funny. Like where does Superman go to change anymore? Cell phones totally ****ed up the program.

                                                                        1. re: kattyeyes
                                                                          Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 10:15 PM

                                                                          <You'd be lucky to find a damn phone booth in this day and age>

                                                                          I know. I was thinking just about that after writing it. I don't remember seeing phone booths anymore, and if there are any still exist, I wonder if a quarter is still enough.

                                                                          This is probably why we don't see Superman around anymore, and they stop selling those underwear with pockets.

                                                                          1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                                            Justpaula Nov 18, 2012 02:20 PM

                                                                            My two year old seems to find every pay phone in this city and insists that he has to "make a call", which always a) confuses me because we don't even have a landline at home, so how does he know those things are phones? and; b) makes me pull him away and say, "Icky, icky, don't touch!!"

                                                                            1. re: Justpaula
                                                                              Chemicalkinetics Nov 18, 2012 03:12 PM

                                                                              <every pay phone in this city >

                                                                              Which city do you live in? I live close to Philly, and I don't see pay phones anymore.

                                                                              <a) confuses me because we don't even have a landline at home, so how does he know those things are phones?>

                                                                              Well, maybe he watch a lot of TV or maybe he saw people walking in there making calls.

                                                                              <b) makes me pull him away and say, "Icky, icky, don't touch!!">

                                                                              :) Phone booths are that dirty. These days they are probably what the CIA and FBI still use to make anonymity call.

                                                              2. re: cleobeach
                                                                EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:22 PM

                                                                BTW, if you look for electric takoyaki pans on Amazon, you'll probably see the same one for a lot less. And you meant pumpkin bowls, didnt you??

                                                              3. s
                                                                StringerBell Nov 14, 2012 10:28 PM

                                                                Here's a sweet $800 bread knife, it's actually quite a bargain since the SRP is $1300.

                                                                http://www.williams-sonoma.com/produc...

                                                                How can anyone cut bread without a knife made of a single piece of Damascus, using 160 layers of hand-folded steel, ice-hardening techniques, precision lasers to ensure each blade's edge is at the optimal cutting angel, a curved bolster to provide a seamless transition from handle to blade, and elegant styling with a richly grained, silky black appearance? I'm not even sure my lousy $5 bread knife even has a "bolster."

                                                                I want a job at Williams Sonoma coming up with creative descriptions to justify the prices they charge, that sounds like fun.

                                                                5 Replies
                                                                1. re: StringerBell
                                                                  Delucacheesemonger Nov 15, 2012 02:04 AM

                                                                  While at this point l wish my handle was BrotherMazone, your job wish is sort of J Peterman for food and utensils.
                                                                  The blog was indeed hilarious.

                                                                  1. re: StringerBell
                                                                    sunshine842 Nov 15, 2012 04:00 AM

                                                                    cutting bread with a Damascus blade is somehow similar to killing mosquitoes with a 20-pound sledge hammer.

                                                                    It'll do the job, but *why*?

                                                                    1. re: StringerBell
                                                                      Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 06:07 AM

                                                                      I bet you that a $700 Damascus paring knife is even better. It is $100 less, and it is much smaller, and... no one will ever see you using it to peel an apple:

                                                                      http://www.williams-sonoma.com/produc...

                                                                      There was an older thread, where a few of us knife enthusiasts were talking about these knives. One thing really funny about is the marketing/pricing. The "Suggested Price" for the bread knife is $1349, but "Our Price" is only "$799.95". Now here is the fun part. It is a Williams Sonoma exclusive product. Zwilling Henckels made these knives specifically for Williams Sonoma. So who exactly suggested a price of $1349?

                                                                      1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                                        al b. darned Nov 15, 2012 06:50 PM

                                                                        Kind of like the "List Price" on Amazon. They frequently inflate the "List Price" to make it seem like a bargain. I have seen many times where you could buy the same item from manufacturer's web site for the same or less than Amazon's selling price, but Amazon's "List Price" was a lot higher.

                                                                      2. re: StringerBell
                                                                        EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:18 PM

                                                                        Makes me realize that the local 4th Avenue Street Fair overprices for the custom high-end wood bread knife is quite the bargain. Comparatively speaking. 8^)

                                                                      3. s
                                                                        StringerBell Nov 14, 2012 09:35 PM

                                                                        I like these: http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/seed-saving-packets/?pkey=cfood-agrarian-garden-seeds&cm_src=food-agrarian-garden-seeds||NoFacet-_-NoFacet-_--_-

                                                                        Seed saving packets with a picture of either...a mushroom or a bird on it. It comes in handy during spring time to make sure you don't end up planting mushroom "seeds" when you really wanted to grow birds.

                                                                        Set of 12 envelopes (6 mushroom and 6 bird).
                                                                        Envelopes constructed of matte paper with black ink.
                                                                        Custom scallop edges trim envelope flaps.
                                                                        Custom printed by Austin Press, a San Francisco design and printing studio specializing in fine letterpress.

                                                                        I'm sold. That $.50 50 pack of tiny baggies from the arts and crafts section just isn't getting it done any more. The ridiculous descriptions remind me of the business card scene in American Psycho. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoIvd3...

                                                                        4 Replies
                                                                        1. re: StringerBell
                                                                          kattyeyes Nov 15, 2012 04:51 AM

                                                                          <It comes in handy during spring time to make sure you don't end up planting mushroom "seeds" when you really wanted to grow birds.>
                                                                          I almost spit out my tea on that one! HA HA HA! You nailed it with the American Psycho scene, too.

                                                                          1. re: StringerBell
                                                                            Chemicalkinetics Nov 15, 2012 06:19 AM

                                                                            That is a funny and scary youtube video. Ha ha.

                                                                            1. re: StringerBell
                                                                              EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:18 PM

                                                                              Yeah, they've gone overboard with that shit for sure, I agree.

                                                                              1. re: StringerBell
                                                                                TheCarrieWatson Jan 9, 2013 04:47 PM

                                                                                Oh man, best post ever.

                                                                              2. jmcarthur8 Nov 14, 2012 08:32 PM

                                                                                It takes a lot to make me laugh out loud when I'm reading stuff online. But this blog had me somewhere between giggling and snorting until I got to the chicken coop. At that one, I had tears in my eyes and couldn't tell DH what was so funny, I was laughing so hard.
                                                                                Which by the way, the Ace Hardware down the street has them for $99 (without a painted chicken. I'll bet the chickens will figure out what it's for without international symbols)

                                                                                1. kattyeyes Nov 14, 2012 07:51 PM

                                                                                  "Butter your biscuits monthly with Callie’s Biscuit of the Month Club." AH HA HA HA HA!
                                                                                  $199.95 USD for 3 months; $399.95 for 6 months
                                                                                  I am NOT making this up!
                                                                                  http://www.calliesbiscuits.com/collec...

                                                                                  1 Reply
                                                                                  1. re: kattyeyes
                                                                                    EWSflash Nov 21, 2012 05:13 PM

                                                                                    Yeah, you thought Williams Sonoma was insanely priced...
                                                                                    WS has always been a high end store, and twenty-five years ago they had so much wonderful, unique stuff, I spent a lot of many of my paychecks there. But the market has changed so drastically with the internet and the general increase in knowledge and interest in food since the early days of WS, I'm not surprised (usually) at any apparently crazy departure that any catalog company has. In fact, the old companies that are still able to be in business get a hats-off from me, no matter how silly some of their stuff is.
                                                                                    For instance- I love Michael Chiarelli's Napa Style catalog, and have gotten some furniture (on sale it's merely expensive, and the quality has always been good) and other things from them. They had a set of glasses that were so damn cute I had to buy them, even though they were $50.00 for six, a lot for me for a whimsical thing. The glasses were so adorable, and I love them, but somewhat delicate, and since I'm the only one in the house that loved those glasses, half of them met their end in the dishwasher (I'm also the only female). When I was down to two from the original six, I looked them up in the Napa Style catalog, and whoo- they were up to $70 for six of them. So I remembered when I opened the box they came in the Chinese font label on the inside box said "dainty glasses", so I did an intensive search for dainty glasses, found many places that had the same ones, and finally found one that had them for half the price, plus a couple of bucks for postage. So I bought them.
                                                                                    WS is an icon to me, even though I dont buy much from them these days I like to keep my options open for an old company that fueled my desire to buy kitchen stuff. I still love Napa Style, too, even though they've clearly gone supernova price-wise. Check out what you can do with a bottle cutter and some experience there.

                                                                                  2. kattyeyes Nov 14, 2012 07:31 PM

                                                                                    I'm now reading all the way through. This WHOLE PIECE is just laugh out loud hysterical. PLEASE READ IT! It's funny as the Weight Watchers cards (Candyboots)...no, even funnier, I think!

                                                                                    1. k
                                                                                      KrumTx Nov 14, 2012 05:20 PM

                                                                                      Ha! Love it! The Hungarian sack, where else would I put my dirty cheese, and looking late at night for the potato scrubber and only finding the carrot one. Great stuff! I agree that the chocolates look amazing, though. Thanks for sharing this.

                                                                                      1. c
                                                                                        Cachetes Nov 14, 2012 05:15 PM

                                                                                        The Hungarian sack takes the cake. I have no examples of seasonal humor except for the fact that I order from W-S once/year, at Christmastime, for a relative who only wants things from here. And if I don't laugh at that, I'll cry....

                                                                                        1. kattyeyes Nov 14, 2012 05:13 PM

                                                                                          Now this is funny--re the cheese hamper:
                                                                                          "Notes from Drew: Where else am I supposed to put my dirty cheese?"

                                                                                          My friend and I went to the W-S outlet store yesterday. They were selling sexy, red espresso machines--ALL REFURBISHED. Ummm, you have boxes upon boxes piled high of REFURBISHED espresso machines...what was wrong with them in the first place? HA HA HA! "Would you like to buy our secondhand f***ed up goods we couldn't get right the first time? Hmm? Would you?"

                                                                                          I left still wanting the Nordic Ware Honeycomb Cake Pan (for real, I did)...and it was actually on sale. I may go back and get it before Christmas because I like bees and am a whimsical kinda gal, myself. :)
                                                                                          http://www.williams-sonoma.com/produc...

                                                                                          2 Replies
                                                                                          1. re: kattyeyes
                                                                                            e
                                                                                            EllieS Nov 27, 2012 03:49 PM

                                                                                            I actually have that Honeycomb cake pan, and it is fun to use, the recipe on the packaging is really good as well. On caveat though - it is a pain to clean, because of all the little ridges and it needs to be handwashed.

                                                                                            1. re: EllieS
                                                                                              kattyeyes Nov 27, 2012 06:29 PM

                                                                                              Ah, that's good feedback. Thank you! If the pan is still there when I go back to the outlet store, it's coming home with me. :)

                                                                                          2. Chemicalkinetics Nov 14, 2012 05:02 PM

                                                                                            10 pieces of Smores for $29 (What the hell? You mean my parents and my club scout had fed me crappy cheap smores all these years? They freaking lied to me and made me to make my own smores with a stupid camp fire, while I could have ordered these smores from Williams Sonoma. From now on, I am going to feed my children with these, and tell them that "Jimmy. Daddy loves you. You have no idea how tough life was. When I was your age, I had to start my own fire in order to make my own smores".):

                                                                                            http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/smores/?pkey=cfood-new

                                                                                            a $25 caramel apple (Talk about feeling rich. "Hey, Mr. Homeless. See this f--king giant caramel apple? Yeah, one bite of it is more than your entire day worth of meal. You bet Snow White wants to bite this badass!"):

                                                                                            http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/giant-holiday-caramel-apple/?pkey=cfood-top-10-gifts

                                                                                            A $220 honing steel (Yeah, everyone know you have to use a bull horn honing steel. Who care if the steel itself works. I don't want people see me holding anything but a bull horn. What would my neighbor think if they see me holding a plastic handle honing steel. Oh the thought of a plastic handle boning steel makes me want to puke):

                                                                                            http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/saladini-ox-horn-honing-steel/?pkey=ccutlery-new

                                                                                            $60 iPhone case (I have $60 which I don't know what to do with. Oh yes, instead of donating to Red Cross and Salvation Army. I will donate to Williams Sonoma and get this stupid sh*t):

                                                                                            http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/leather-iphone-case/?pkey=chome-new

                                                                                            A $60 WS version of the Chinese spider skimmer (I have no idea why the Chinese chefs use the cheap ass brass color dull looking $7 spider skimmer. Anyone knows anything will want a shiny 18/10 stainless steel Williams Sonoma engraved spider skimmer. It will automatically makes my Chinese food better. For $60, I can instantly improve my Chinese noodle or Ramen, or whatever sh*t they do in the kitchen):

                                                                                            http://www.williams-sonoma.com/produc...

                                                                                            2 Replies
                                                                                            1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                                                              jw615 Nov 14, 2012 09:59 PM

                                                                                              $25 for a caramel apple is definitely ridiculous. I buy my mother caramel apples from an online seller for most holidays (I got her flowers for mother's day once, and she told me the apples were better). They are expensive, but not $25, and I can choose from multiple varieties and they look better.

                                                                                              Tastewise, I don't know - allergic to apples, don't need to go to the ER.

                                                                                              1. re: Chemicalkinetics
                                                                                                jmcarthur8 Nov 15, 2012 03:05 AM

                                                                                                Now, about that caramel apple. It says it serves 17. It's a 1 1/2 to 2 pound apple. Besides the difficulty of trying to evenly divide the apple into 17 slices (all having an equal amount of caramel, 'cause nobody wants to be shorted their caramel), where do you find 17 people who want only one slice of this apple? Last time DH and I had a honkin' big caramel apple like this, it took the two of us to eat it, but I sure wouldn't have wanted 15 more people lined up in my kitchen waiting for their share.

                                                                                              2. alkapal Nov 14, 2012 04:43 PM

                                                                                                i need that hungarian sack stocking.

                                                                                                and he's right, sacks ARE big in hungary!

                                                                                                i mjight also need the potato washing gloves. right now, i use my stainless steel scrubbie, thereby marring the nutritious skin!

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