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Two people ordering the same dish; ok?

My husband is not ok with us both ordering the same thing at a restaurant even if that's what we both want... I think this might be a cultural thing. Does anyone feel the same and if so, can you help me explain why.

Many Thanks!

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  1. I think this is perfectly fine.

    In fact, when you do a tasting menu, this is taken to the nth degree.

    1. I would hope he's the one who changes his order if he feels this way!

      1. Very silly. The only reason I could think not too is if you want to try more things from the menu. Maybe your husband is hoping you'll get something different so he can have his AND yours!

        1. "I think this might be a cultural thing"

          What culture?`

          6 Replies
          1. re: FrankJBN

            Family culture. He seems to have picked up somewhere that that it's just "not done" or embarrassing somehow. I don't quite understand it but he gets very uncomfortable. I want to be supportive and understanding but sometimes don't want to share.

            1. re: musugu

              ohhhh he wants you to share so he wants you to get something different. We do this sometimes but only when we both are in agreement. Either of us has been known to say, I really want it all so if you want some order your own dish. And that is fine too.

              1. re: musugu

                Interesting. In my family, a bit of familial sharing was OK, but plates were usually not passed. Soup was an obvious exception.

                Hunt

                1. re: Bill Hunt

                  Does one pass the soup to the left or the right?

                  1. re: Peg

                    Neither. Away from one's self.

                    1. re: Peg

                      Well, I would suppose that this would depend on which side of the one, who ordered the soup, was sitting.

                      Hunt

              2. While I don't have strong feelings about it, my wife and I usually make a conscious effort to order different things from each other at restaurants. Mainly for the sake of variety since we share plates. I think it's especially wise not to get the same thing when you're ordering something you both haven't tried before.

                4 Replies
                1. re: Chi_Guy

                  I dont really have any stromg feeling about it either, but now thinking about it I can only recall one time we ordered the same thing and even then we ordered it prepared a different way. We are sharers though.

                  1. re: LaLa

                    Mr S and I tend to order different things and share bites (or not share if he orders lamb or I order liver). There are rare occasions we both want the same thing, so that's what we order. No rules or customs or etiquette involved.

                    When I go out with my work team for lunch (about 12 of us), I can usually tell what one item on the menu most people will order...usually a pasta/chicken combo. Usually at least half the team will order the same thing.

                    1. re: Sooeygun

                      I'm very cool with that. You get the liver, and I get the lamb - nothing ba-a-ad about that, as long as one wine can work with both courses, or we can have other wines somewhere along the line.

                      Hunt

                  2. re: Chi_Guy

                    Sounds like my family. We also will chose dishes, based on the wines, that we wish to drink, but nothing is set in stone. As we have slightly different tastes, it has proven fairly easy for us, and there are few meals, regardless of the number of courses, where we DO order the same things. When we do, that is fine too. No big deal. I just try to pick a wine for THAT course.

                    Hunt

                  3. Do you both use the same brand of toothpaste?

                    1 Reply
                    1. re: beevod

                      In our case - NO, but that is almost as personal as the choice of dishes in a restaurant.

                      Wife does some eggplant dish, and I order the scallops. She cannot do bi-valves, and I have had but a few eggplant dishes, that I would want to revisit. Life is good, but I WILL share my toothpaste in the Red Carpet Club, if she runs out...

                      Hunt

                          1. re: Veggo

                            Now we normally huddle first, and make those difficult choices. Sometimes, we ARE the last couple to order, as the huddles can take some time.

                            Hunt

                          2. If I'm at a new place and want to try stuff, it's fun if everyone orders something different. But I think a person should order what he or she wants, even if everyone at the table gets the same thing.

                            1. I feel the way your husband does, which is not to say I think he & I are right. It's because I'd like to sample, or at least look at, a different plate of food than the one in front of me. It doesn't embarrass me if someone orders what I order; it annoys me. (Again, not saying this is right. Just true.)

                              1. I generally try to order something different from those I'm with so that I can get a taste of different dishes. On the other hand, my friends and I regularly go out Friday evenings, and we each order exactly the same thing, but that's more of an exception.

                                It really doesn't bother me if the person/s I'm dining with order the same thing as me, but I try to avoid it.

                                1. For me, it completely depends on the person I'm dining with and whether that person is a "sharer" or not. I am, and when eating out with certain people, we routinely strategize on ordering so that we can swap plates entirely, mid-course. But if my dining companion just isn't that kind of person, and many aren't, then I have no problem getting the same thing.

                                  1 Reply
                                  1. re: travelmad478

                                    Same with me. Usually my SO or my twin like to share, but we have ordered the same thing before without fan fare.

                                  2. Hi Everyone. Thanks for the insight. To clarify: just because he doesn't like it doesn't mean it never happens, I just wanted to do a reality check. He's uncomfortable ordering the same thing I think because he thinks it's weird or embarrassing to order two of the same from the server. I don't get it but I also understand that what a person finds to be odd or embarrassing is usually based on what you were taught is the norm and clearly we weren't raised by the same family.

                                    Again, thank you for the group reality check and I am genuinely interested if anyone else feels the same way that he does just to get more insight. He's unfortunately unable to articulate past "it's weird".

                                    15 Replies
                                    1. re: musugu

                                      I am seriously curious. Do you guys ever do tasting menus? What are his thoughts then?

                                      1. re: ipsedixit

                                        We do tasting menus.... most recently we did Vetri in Philadelphia for a special occasion. With tasting menus it's set up that way so he's comfortable that we're not breaking the unwritten social rule. And actually, I do remember that at Vetri they never gave us exactly the same item because the assumption is that we would share.

                                        1. re: musugu

                                          Even with Tasting Menus, we often end up with a few different dishes. I contact the restaurant beforehand, and point out that my wife cannot do bi-valves, so I might get the scallops, or oysters, and she might get something else. Even when we do the sommelier's wine pairings, they accommodate the two of us. Now, she can do a taste of a scallop, or an oyster, but not much. I get a bigger taste, than she does, in those instances. We do share the wines.

                                          Hunt

                                      2. re: musugu

                                        It would be nice to hear from some servers about this.

                                        I was one in another lifetime. I really would not care what you order. Actually if both plates are the same, it's more convenient.

                                        1. re: ChillyDog

                                          " Actually if both plates are the same, it's more convenient."

                                          Indeed it is much more convenient for a table to have as much in common as possible. It's way easier on the kitchen, and therefore easier on the servers.

                                          1. re: ChillyDog

                                            I used to be a server and it never even crossed my mind, I just took the orders and served them.

                                            1. re: ChillyDog

                                              As a server, I always find it hilarious when people are reluctant to order the same meal. I have heard so many people say something like " I want the lamb meatball spaghetti, but that's what John's having". Some people literally ask my permission! I always say that you should order what you really want to eat!

                                            2. re: musugu

                                              My husband is the same way, unless its at a place that specializes in something specific. I'll usually ask him if its ok before I order just to be nice. Similarly, he will usually order in the same style as me so if I am getting an entree he won't get a sandwich or vice versa. I figure that I have my fair share of quirks- he can have this one.

                                              1. re: musugu

                                                I think this is more about your husband's peculiar issues than any convention in the restaurant industry.

                                                1. re: musugu

                                                  My husband and I often order different things so we can taste the others dishes, but every now and then we do order the same thing. He got embarrassed a bit about it once (I don't know why) and when the waitress came for our order and we both ordered the same thing I simply said "It's just so good!" She smiled, agreed deeply and that was that. He never felt self conscious after that!

                                                  Heck, many restaurants make their reputations on a single dish, so I think it happens way more often than not that folks order the same thing - it's what they've come for. I guess we all just don't talk about it much : )

                                                  1. re: musugu

                                                    My boyfriend and I often share bites, but we don't like to order the same thing because we're quite immature and don't want to be seen as 'copying' each other. I should probably edit that to say 'extremely immature'. But we do laugh about it. If your husband doesn't want to be specific about what about it makes him feel weird, he could possibly just be embarrassed about being immature.

                                                    I usually 'win' though, because I'm the lady and I always get to order first. :o)

                                                      1. re: huiray

                                                        All's fair in love and culinary warfare..

                                                      2. re: soypower

                                                        I have never thought about "copying," but do like to have different "tastes," where applicable.

                                                        Guess that I had not thought it through enough.

                                                        Hunt

                                                        1. re: Bill Hunt

                                                          I hardly think you have an issue with not thinking it through enough. It's probably the mere fact that you have actually entered adulthood. We're still waiting to get there. :o)

                                                    1. While it doesn't bother me, I understand the psychology of it. Assuming he comes from an "adventurous" family when it comes to eating, there is probably a presumption that everyone will share each others' dishes, so that the family gets to taste everything. He probably views ordering the same dish as passive-aggressive anti-social; you're saying "I want this all to myself, and since you're having the same thing, you can't share mine."

                                                      10 Replies
                                                      1. re: sbp

                                                        " you're saying "I want this all to myself, and since you're having the same thing, you can't share mine.""

                                                        Deftly directing the reversed tines of a fork into the trespassing hand is far more effective, of course.

                                                        1. re: Karl S

                                                          I wasn't going to comment on this thread, as wife and I often order the same dish in a restaurant, BUT>>>>
                                                          "Deftly directing the reversed tines of a fork into the trespassing hand is far more effective, of course"
                                                          My 66 year old brother has 4 feint marks on his right wrist from when he attempted to take a piece of crisp turkey skin from my plate, Thanksgiving dinner 1963. He has never reached for sonething on someone else's plate since.

                                                          1. re: bagelman01

                                                            Well, another way for him to remember the assassination and funeral of JFK to his grandchildren. Wonderful. He would not gotten away with that at our table at the time, either (though I was only just shy of 3 years old, I had 4 older sibs, and one yet to come; he came the day after the eldest graduated high school in '68).

                                                            1. re: bagelman01

                                                              Really??? I can't believe you would do something like that. I guess food brings out the beast in you.

                                                              1. re: mucho gordo

                                                                Mucho,
                                                                He was warned twice by me and my father told him that if he ever put his fork.hand into some one else's plate again it would be the last time. As far as I know it was........

                                                                1. re: bagelman01

                                                                  I admire your willingness to protect your food at all costs. Lesson learned.

                                                                  1. re: mucho gordo

                                                                    I am very territorial. Tomorrow night we're having the family for the holiday dinner.
                                                                    One roast turkey breast, 6 extra necks, 12 extra wings....no one likes dark meat.
                                                                    Doing it this way avoids disputes and grabbing.

                                                                    1. re: bagelman01

                                                                      Is that a traditional Mexican Independence Day dinner?? "Let's eat the Mutant Turkey!"?

                                                                2. re: mucho gordo

                                                                  I was preparing a family meal and a guest jumped in to "help". But she was so sloppy and all over my cutting board with her sloppy ways, that I instinctively stabbed her in the hand...oops

                                                            2. re: sbp

                                                              And that is what I say sometimes LOL. No passive aggressive about it. I'll call it out boldly.

                                                            3. Please assure him there is no unwritten social rule. HIS believing there is the only thing that is weird here.

                                                              I'm gonna order whatever I want and keep your paws off, please, unless invited.

                                                              3 Replies
                                                              1. re: ChillyDog

                                                                My mom expects us all to negotiate dessert so we all order something different in order to share. I refuse to take part and don't reveal until I actually order. My mom can't stand that. She says "What if we all end up getting the same thing?" My reply: "Then I guess we'll all have gotten what we really wanted!"

                                                                1. re: Leonardo

                                                                  For dessert, my wife normally does a sweet, and I a cheese course. She normally gets more cheese, as I usually only take on fork/spoon for her sweet.

                                                                  Hunt

                                                                2. we rarely even think of ordering the same thing. our tastes are very different. he'll see a pork roast with brandy apples on the side on the menu at (for instance a Railway City Restaurant in the heart of our local mountains) whereas I feel inclined to order a flat iron steak burrito with rice and beans.

                                                                  there have been maybe 2 times in our lifetime that we've both decided on the same thing. reason for that is nothing else on menu really appealed to us. that's fine too.

                                                                  we have no steadfast rules when ordering. anything goes.
                                                                  when we go to a diner he'll order classic cheeseburger with a side salad , come and coffee.
                                                                  I always order a patty melt with fries and iced tea.
                                                                  he always feeds me his salad and he always takes fries from my plate.
                                                                  and I wouldn't have it any other way.

                                                                  1 Reply
                                                                  1. re: iL Divo

                                                                    Kind of sounds like us. Wife will nearly always do fish, where I will go more to red meat. However, and in the recent past, we have both gone for the same red meat. No biggie, as she goes more toward medium, and I am more medium rare, to rare, depending on the chef. Stuff happens.

                                                                    We do like to taste each others dishes, and sometimes that works out great, but when the menu does not accommodate, it is not a problem, and we just smile at each other.

                                                                    Hunt

                                                                  2. I order exactly what I want and if someone else gets the same thing, I just assume that that is what they wanted as well. Of course, I am disinclined to share at all. Order what you want and leave mine alone. I am always privately horrified when people switch plates part way through the meal. I understand wanting to try a bit of everything but for some reason, I just find the plate switching gross.

                                                                    I also don't like to be told what to do, so that might make me revert to an obstinate child with unpleasant results.

                                                                    1. I think your husband is at the far end of the spectrum on this if he thinks its wrong to order the same thing. If there are 6 people dining together, would he expect everyone to order something different?What happens with dinners at home? Do you prepare different meals for everyone? Order what you like. I don't mind sharing but if I want to have the same thing as someone else, I will have it.

                                                                      1. This is all very interesting... I think I've decided/realized based on the focus on sharing that he probably just doesn't like when I (through my actions) say that I don't want to share with him and that he maybe feels it doesn't reflect well on us as a couple that we wouldn't. Now that I think of it, the issue doesn't really come up when other people order the same thing as he does, he just really objects when we both order the same thing. Although he might care and just bite his tongue when it's someone else; ha! the wonders of marriage. It really does bring out the crazy in a person. (myself included)

                                                                        2 Replies
                                                                        1. re: musugu

                                                                          Putting on my Dear Abby hat, I think a bigger issue might be why he's so concerned about what a stranger thinks that he's willing to put your feelings second.

                                                                          1. re: chowser

                                                                            Interesting observation.

                                                                            We try to split things up a bit, but never consider what anyone else is thinking. They are never in our considerations - it is very focused - it is about us, and no one else.

                                                                            Hunt

                                                                        2. I'm going to order what I want to eat regardless of what everyone else at the table orders.

                                                                          1. Of course it's ok, since when is what I order dependent on the other diners? Weird.

                                                                            1. First let me say that I don't think there's anything wrong with 2 people or a whole table ordering the same thing.
                                                                              DH has this same hang up. It's just a thing with him and I know it's because he wants to try not only his meal, but a bit of mine too! Many times, it's hard for him to widdle his decision down to just one thing, because just reading all the possibilities on that menu makes him so excited. He's like a kid in a candy store.
                                                                              Since I know he does this, I sometimes concede a dish to him if I know he really, really wants it and I know I'll be happy with another choice. It makes him happy and he shares. We both do.
                                                                              Since it is his hang up, and I really don't care if we order the same dish, he usually is just fine with me taking "our" first choice.
                                                                              Sometimes I screw with DH a bit and hold off on telling him what I'm going to order and watch him squirm when I ask "so, what looks good to you, what are you going to order?".
                                                                              He just can't help himself!

                                                                              2 Replies
                                                                              1. re: monavano

                                                                                <snicker>

                                                                                Ah the sport of marriage! It's a fun one.

                                                                                1. re: monavano

                                                                                  We hosted a table of ten recently, and everyone went with the salmon. We should have gone with the "rubber chicken," but who knew?

                                                                                  Hunt

                                                                                2. When DH and I go out to eat with our two adult sons, the older one will plan with me on two shared dishes, as we each get kind of tastebud-bored pretty easily. Son #2, however, will wait till hubby has chosen his meal, so he doesn't order the same thing. There's some kind of tradition between the two of them not to order the same, and young-son will order last to make sure that doesn't happen. The two of them will negotiate for first choice if it's something one really wants. I think they both are nuts.

                                                                                  4 Replies
                                                                                  1. re: jmcarthur8

                                                                                    Some times you feel like a nut, other times you birth them...

                                                                                      1. re: Veggo

                                                                                        Once in a while you get a fruit, also. Still, he's my son and I love him.

                                                                                        1. re: Veggo

                                                                                          Once, I thought that I was passing a walnut, but that is fodder for another thread, and maybe not here...

                                                                                          Hunt

                                                                                      2. As others have commented, he does seem a little odd. I agree with chowsers' comment.

                                                                                        Of course all this is predicated on the meals you are talking about being Western/European-format meals. Why not try dining more in Chinese/E Asian/SE Asian places where the norm would be to order several dishes and share them family-style? :-) Do you eat these cuisines at all? (I wonder since you have said nothing about these)

                                                                                        1. Interesting thread. I know quite a few people that are under the impression that it's not okay to order the same thing. I never got that memo and I am never the one to change my order. I am also not really a sharer, so people aren't changing their order to try different things. There must have been some etiquette advice somewhere, sometime, that advised against ordering the same thing.

                                                                                          1 Reply
                                                                                          1. re: christy319

                                                                                            Went to dinner last night and we both got the same dish. NOT on purpose. Server had 3 specials, husband asked to have the "shrimp one" described again, then ordered it. I said, "I'll have the salmon." Meal was delivered, both the shrimp pasta dish, server said, "Oh, I thought you said "I'll have the SAME". I kept it, it was getting late, and it just seemed the thing to do. Be careful when ordering around a SALMON choice, this also happened to my son, but in reverse.

                                                                                          2. Eh. My husband and I have done this on occasion. I personally couldn't care less if someone thinks it's weird. If I was worried about what others thought, it's because I'd lump it in with those annoying couples who sit on the same side of a booth (with no one on the other side) and call each other cloyingly sweet pet names in public.

                                                                                            1. I hated it when I would go to a new restaurant with my Ex, we'd look at the menus (usually I'd have researched it ahead of time and discussed what they had to offer with him), he'd allow me to place my order first.....and then tell the Waiter that he'd have the exact same thing based on the fact that for him it was "just food". No variety, no adventure, no desire to learn something new....just open his pie hole and shove it in. Did I mention he's an Ex?

                                                                                              1. If I want a dish I order it and I expect my husband to do the same. Now if there are two dishes we are both considering then we might agree to order one of each and split them. But to say ordering the same is weird or embarrassing, well the person who says that has the problem--maybe a need to control?--not you. Stand up and place your order, after he does.

                                                                                                1. Although my girlfriend and I both eat a wide variety of foods, it's very common that we will both study a menu, and without discussion between us, will order the same thing. At that point, I usually roll my eyes, and change my order...

                                                                                                  http://burghfeeding.blogspot.com/

                                                                                                  1. Maybe he grew up eating at Shopsin's?
                                                                                                    ;-D

                                                                                                    I was once out with a friend and their family for dinner (we were teens). Everyone ordered the same dish. The Father grumbled all night that we might as well have eaten at home. In his mind the point to dining out was that everyone could order something different.

                                                                                                    4 Replies
                                                                                                    1. re: meatn3

                                                                                                      What if a restaurant is famous for a special dish? Should one of a couple order a greaseburger at Lobsters-R-Us, to comport with some silly imaginary restriction? I would feel moronic eating squab at Durgin-Park while most others feast on roast beef.

                                                                                                      1. re: Veggo

                                                                                                        Their roast pork, with stuffing, is far superior to the roast beef. Topped of with Indian Pudding .......magnifique.

                                                                                                        1. re: mucho gordo

                                                                                                          So much for our girlish figures, mucho...!

                                                                                                    2. I dont understand the uneasyness over ordering the same meal, kinda strange to me.

                                                                                                      I have a different problem. My fiancee "shares" my meal and orders something that I dont like. Now THAT pisses me off! Now I just threaten to order veal (I love, she won't touch) and she gets the hint.

                                                                                                      10 Replies
                                                                                                        1. re: mucho gordo

                                                                                                          as my mother told my bride to be years ago:

                                                                                                          What's his is yours, what's yours is yours

                                                                                                          1. re: bagelman01

                                                                                                            Really? WOW.

                                                                                                            I *hope* joe777cool orders whatever his fiancée hates every time they eat out from now on.

                                                                                                            1. re: huiray

                                                                                                              My wife doesn't eat, veal or lamb; my two favorite things to order <VBG>

                                                                                                              1. re: bagelman01

                                                                                                                Good fer ya. But then there's still the veggies/starch or sides...

                                                                                                                1. re: huiray

                                                                                                                  I always choose rice if offered, then pasta, then potato. Wife the opposite.
                                                                                                                  We tend to order the same veg.

                                                                                                              1. re: mucho gordo

                                                                                                                The first wife hated meat not cooked to death, I order mooing, so she never touched the meat on my plate.
                                                                                                                2nd wife doesn't eat veal or lamb, and could easily be a vegetarian.

                                                                                                          2. re: joe777cool

                                                                                                            I remember going out to breakfast with my cousin and her husband one morning and thinking how gallant he was when my cousin couldn't decide what she wanted most. She ordered one dish, but then changed her mind to the other dish. He told the server not to change her order, but his (he had ordered a completely different dish). Very sweet.

                                                                                                          3. My wife and I order what we wish, even if it is the same thing. Sometimes if we are in a new restaurant, we will decide to order two different dishes just so we can try more than one menu item, but it's not mandatory.

                                                                                                            1. "Does anyone feel the same" - Sorta. Maybe not dogmatically, but my SO and I rarely order the same thing.

                                                                                                              We like to share across plates quite a bit, so we often reach some sort of agreement on what we're going to order together. Usually works like this: I choose two dishes that I might order. I let her go first, then if she picks one of my choices, I'll order the other one.

                                                                                                              Why do we do this? Why try just one dish when you can taste two! Life is short, only so many meals, and a lot of times we like to 'steal' dishes from restaurant menus to recreate at home. 'Research'. Ordering two different items in a course doubles the haul. ;)

                                                                                                              HTH -

                                                                                                              3 Replies
                                                                                                              1. re: jonoropeza

                                                                                                                OP here. We usually do the same; where we order together kind of a a mutual top 2 tasty sounding dishes. It's just sometimes, in a particular mood, I just want to house the whole dish of nachos by myself and not feel possessive of that chip with a lot of cheese off in the corner of the dish. It's not the best version of me but it does happen.

                                                                                                                1. re: musugu

                                                                                                                  Ha! Maybe time to renegotiate the sharing rules? We try only to give, not to take from each others plates. Ok, *she* only gives. I try to keep to the rules, but sometimes I'm a pig and reach across and steal something from her plate. Lucky for both of us, she's forgiving... and very good about just ordering two orders of nachos if she senses I'm going to eat 3/4 of the order if we only do one.

                                                                                                                  Good luck!

                                                                                                                2. re: jonoropeza

                                                                                                                  That makes sense if you eat out at many different places. We go to just a few and one makes a great duck confit appetizer--we both want it so we always both order it.

                                                                                                                3. Board posts don;t usually explore all the possible angles of an issue, so it's difficult to be too judgmental, but "breaking the unwritten social rule" is a tough position to understand. I've certainly never heard of any such rule.

                                                                                                                  Is ordering the same thing supposed to say something negative about you? Maybe that you're dull and boring; that you don't have the imagination to be different? Huh? Why is it any more complex than that you each order what you would like to eat?

                                                                                                                  Sorry. I don't know that this is necessarily anything to be really upset about, but it is most certainly odd. I'd really love to know where he got this notion. "It's weird" isn't really giving you much respect I'm afraid.

                                                                                                                  1. We normally will find alternates on the menu, and will not order the same thing. However, there have been several times, where we have, other than Chef's Tasting Menus.

                                                                                                                    Normally, we alternate, and then share, so that each gets to taste the other's choices.

                                                                                                                    Hunt

                                                                                                                    1. In general, I am the same with your husband.....down to feeling like there's a "norm" being broken. That being said, I also feel that it's ridiculous.

                                                                                                                      However, that being said - I will be more proactive to change my order to something different if it's a restaurant I've never been to or a restaurant that's more pricey and the chance of me being able to go again and try other dishes is less likely. In those cases, I feel it'd be a shame for the whole table to only have "one" experience of the food there. I feel this most strongly when I'm with a boyfriend or my family where I'm more open about sharing dishes. Where I go completely against the "order differently" idea, is if it's a restaurant where I go regularly. And especially a place where one or two dishes are clearly just the "best" orders on the menu.

                                                                                                                      6 Replies
                                                                                                                      1. re: cresyd

                                                                                                                        I have reflected a bit on this thread, and do feel that my wife might be more inclined to NOT order what she wants, if I have expressed an interest in the same. We do discuss things, but I am usually the one to make other options (to share tastes), and always want to go with her 1st choice, but sometimes I have detected a hesitancy, on her part, to do so. Hm-m-m. Maybe I need to pay closer attention?

                                                                                                                        Hunt

                                                                                                                        1. re: Bill Hunt

                                                                                                                          Please tell Mrs. Hunt that she has a keeper. :-)

                                                                                                                          1. re: Bill Hunt

                                                                                                                            In my personal case, I would also say that there's a bit my own individual weirdness going on. There's a very pricey restaurant near where my parents live that they go to 2-3 times a year for celebrations. As I live far away, my ability to join such meals has dropped to around once every 2-3 years. I have eaten there a number of times, and my favorite appetizer there is a salad they do. However, I always feel compeled to try another starter because it's such a pricey place with such good food that I feel like I'm missing out if I just order that salad. And then I always lust after the plate of the person who ordered the salad.

                                                                                                                            So I do admit that in the search for variety/new experiences I am prone to shoot myself in the foot.

                                                                                                                            1. re: cresyd

                                                                                                                              Like you, I generally order something different each visit to any one restaurant. Except for a local cafe that we go to maybe two or three times a year. Their 'Jellyfish' sandwich is so good I order it every time I go, even though so many other items on the menu are equally as delicious.
                                                                                                                              I don't know which is worse- missing out on a new taste, or missing out on one you really love!

                                                                                                                            2. re: Bill Hunt

                                                                                                                              Or just let her decide first without input about what you want. Very simple.

                                                                                                                          2. DH and I have a different problem. He always wants to taste mine even if he orders the same thing (guess he thinks mine is made different????). He will also want to sample mine even though he KNOWS I don't like what he ordered so I wouldn't want a taste anyway. Over the years, I just got used to it. However, the one thing I can order that he WON'T taste is cream brule - I love that stuff (oh, and flan too).

                                                                                                                            2 Replies
                                                                                                                            1. re: boyzoma

                                                                                                                              Sounds like my two Bulldogs. Each is totally convinced that the other's food is the better. OK, maybe don't mention that... [Grin]

                                                                                                                              Hunt

                                                                                                                              1. re: Bill Hunt

                                                                                                                                You always give the best replies! Love it. And, you are so totally right.!!!!!!!

                                                                                                                            2. People should be able to order what they want, of course, but I like some variety on the table in a restaurant and I must plead guilty to your husband's crime. I think we go about it this way because sometimes one person's dish is much better than the other person's, and if you both get something that is not great, well, you get the idea... I rarely want a whole steak or an entire order of something like pasta, so this mandatory sharing takes care of that problem as well.

                                                                                                                              1. I guess what's obvious to me at this point is that this is your husband's issue and honestly, you should order what you want.