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Funny scenes at the market

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Have you seen something at the market that had you cracking up? Here’re a few scenes that get me every time.

People who eat samples from all the tasting stations and then proclaim, “Now I don’t have to buy lunch!”

Those darn carts! There’s an older man at one store who collects the shopping carts from the parking lot. He must be mad at them because when he brings them into the store, he’s tossing them around, and cussin’ and fussin’ like you wouldn’t believe. Better stay out of his way!

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  1. I always enjoy observing what people are buying and then try to envision their meals. I try not to be too judgemental. Last night, I was behind a man who was Mr. Veggie and Whole Grain, lots of produce, brown rice, some chicken breasts. He was behind Ms. Junk Food, chips, soda, hamburger helper, other packaged stuff. Watching HIM watching HER, tsking the entire time, was really fun.

    23 Replies
    1. re: tcamp

      There is almost nothing more stimulating than staring (discreetly) into other people's grocery carts and wondering... wondering. Of course, my cart is always full of WTF-stuff anyway, so I don't escape scrutiny. I don't tsk at anyone... I have a rather embarrassing Cheez-it problem myself.

      1. re: DuchessNukem

        I am most likely to do this if I have to pick up something quickly after work. During the regular weekly trip, I'm too busy unloading and organizing to pay attention. After work is when I see what looks like people buying for that night's dinner.

        Usually if I'm doing one of these after work stops it's for baking something last minute (or the last couple of weeks, stopping for yet more sugar for jam making). Someone looking at my stuff would think I am eating very, very badly. Lots of butter, sugar, chocolate.

        1. re: Sooeygun

          Because my veggies come from either my garden or my CSA, and my meat and eggs come from my CSA, anyone who observes me in the grocery store would think I have a horrible diet, or just subsist on wine. Wine, cat litter, maybe some vinegar or olive oil, occasionally some dried beans or the like... that's about it for my grocery cart. I look at other carts, and I'll admit it, pass judgement. But then I think about what I must look like.

          1. re: MelMM

            Depending on the market, my cart would look pretty bad too. I usually buy my produce and meat at a local, independent grocery store. My seafood I usually buy from the retail store at a major seafood exporter near my home. I go to a big national chain for things that aren't "fresh" - boxes goods, oils, junk,

            1. re: MelMM

              I think of this all the time - we buy our produce from the farmer's market, so our grocery cart usually consists of nothing but dairy, oil, and the occasional prepackaged treat.

              "Ms. Junk Food" above reminds me of an old bad joke: A man is standing behind a woman in line - she has a bag of grapes, a 2-liter of diet coke, a stack of Lean Cuisines, and an US magazine. He amiably comments, "You must be single." She replies, smiling, "What gave it away?" Him: "Because you're really unattractive!"

              1. re: thursday

                hahahah! i like!

              2. re: MelMM

                Yes! I feel SO conspicuous at the grocery store, because I sell produce at the market, so of course I would like to project a healthy image to the people I am selling to in my small town. But every time I go to the grocery, I run into my regular customers while I am buying eight weeks worth of seltzer water and tortilla chips. I feel like I look like a hypocrite... "Hey, spend six bucks on my salad mix so I can go to the store for some crackers!"

                1. re: MelMM

                  wine and cat litter works for me. LOL

                  1. re: MelMM

                    It is recycling day and I just walked through the alley with my dogs. Passed a neighbor's house whose recycle bin contained 8 wine bottles, 2 selzer bottles, and 4 cat litter boxes. And nothing more. I'm not judging, though.

                    1. re: tcamp

                      Well, a few weeks ago, when I put out my recycling bin, I had 5 empties bottles of a Spanish grenache, a brandy bottle, and a Triple Sec bottle, 2 bottles of club soda, as well as one larger bottle of white wine, in addition to the paper/cardboard items and cat food cans.

                      Other than the white wine, EVERYTHING else was for 2 gallons of sangria I had made for a party. So perhaps.....

                      1. re: LindaWhit

                        I hear you. Many's the day when my bin looks like an alcoholic's paradise! The slice of life you see when hanging out in alleys is fun.

                      2. re: tcamp

                        I had friends years ago when recycling was just staring who refused to do it because they didn't want people to see all their wine and beer bottles!

                        1. re: Terrie H.

                          We don't have curbside recycling, we need to haul it to designated municipal sites, which are open wacky hours. Our recycling tends to pile up, sometimes for months at a time.

                          One day my husband took it all to a site that is run by the boy scouts, who will unload it for you. They took one look at the back of the truck and proclaimed "gee Mr., you sure do drink a lot!"

                          1. re: cleobeach

                            Classic! :) So funny!

                        2. re: tcamp

                          I remember my neighbor seeing me recycle a quart beer can (my brother's) and saying, That's not yours, is it? ;)

                          1. re: tcamp

                            "good for them. they must compost and use very little packaged goods." is one way of looking at it.

                            (replied to tcamp)

                    2. re: tcamp

                      Sometimes I do this too. Every now and then I see an item that reminds me of what I need to buy or want to try. Then I have to make a dash to retrieve it.

                      There's one cashier who comments on people's groceries as she rings them up. She also offers recipes. She'll say, "Oh, I love those ice cream bars." Or "You can grill those chicken breasts with a little oil and season salt and they're so good."

                      1. re: Spice_zing

                        Trader Joe's cashiers are notorious for this banter. "oh, aren't these amazing? have you tried so and so? i love X with the Y. No? Oh you HAVE TO try it!"

                        1. re: seamunky

                          So are WF checkers.

                      2. re: tcamp

                        I'm another one obsessed with checking out other people's carts. Last week I was in line and noticed the girl ahead of me was about 10 years younger than I was, buying red plastic cups, a gallon of cheap vodka, cigarettes, family sized bag of chips and an US Weekly. I was buying a bag of grapes, organic baby food and a pint of ice cream. The woman behind me, about 10 years older was buying tostinos pizza rolls, a romance novel and cat food. I thought we looked like the stages of man (or in this case woman) on a conveyor belt.

                        1. re: hyacinthgirl

                          Gorgeous!

                          1. re: hyacinthgirl

                            very funny!

                          2. re: tcamp

                            And this is why I shop the produce aisle last. Nothing like a load of lettuce and apples to cover up those Triscuits and brown-sugar Pop-Tarts.

                          3. I've taken to entertaining myself in grocery stores and other stores that have shopping carts. I get really frustrated with other shoppers who (a) 'escort' their carts (that is, walk beside them instead of behind them) because they take up quite a bit more aisle space; and (b) leave their cart in the middle of heavy traffic areas while they peruse the wares on a nearby shelf. Both these kinds of shoppers act as if they're the only ones in the store, and I reward them by putting additional items in their carts when they're not looking. Yeah, it's juvenile. It's also funny.

                            7 Replies
                            1. re: ricepad

                              I like your idea! Have you ever followed and of those cart pushers to check-out to see if they purchase your "rewards"?

                              I usually move these carts to the next aisle. The reactions of the of the cart-abandoners can be hillarious.

                              1. re: Vidute

                                No, I've never stuck around the scene of the crime. A couple of weeks ago, tho, I'm pretty sure my victim purchased my addition to her cart, but it may have sort of backfired on me, too. My addition to her cart was a case of instant ramen. A little while later, I saw her in the check-out line, and she had THREE cases of instant ramen in there. So she either intended to buy a lot of ramen, or she ticked off two other people!

                                I've moved carts, too...always fun, but easier to get caught. I had a roommate who used to 'take over' carts that were left behind, as if it was his stuff. Other times, he'd take stuff OUT of the cart and return it to the shelves.

                                1. re: ricepad

                                  Ahaaa.........so he's the one responsible for the "please check your carts" message crackling over the store's intercom.

                                  Hmmmmmm..... got me to thinking. I"m going to start exchanging national items for store brands. ;)

                                2. re: Vidute

                                  Is that why I can never find my cart?

                                  1. re: sparrowgrass

                                    Caught!

                                3. re: ricepad

                                  That sounds like a fun way to vent the frustration of getting the aisles blocked by carts parked right in the middle!

                                  On the other hand, in the stores where I shop, the traffic jams are more often caused by poor design of the store itself. There is usually barely enough room for two of those gigantic carts to pass each another, and sometimes there is not enough space to get even one through because of merchandise on the floor waiting to be loaded onto the shelves. I often feel like a rat trapped in a maze, trying to find my way through as quickly as I can, the incentive being the desire to get away from the horrible music!

                                  Speaking of which, what I tend to do is to just park my cart at the end of the aisle, then walk through the aisle to get what I want and bring it back to the cart, move my cart to the next to the aisle and repeat. I enjoy zipping, dancing and slipping through the four or so shoppers, sans cart, who are stuck in the aisle with theirs, looking at each other and wondering what to do. I get a false sense of superiority that I am a faster and more efficient shopper!

                                  1. re: ricepad

                                    REWARDS -- brilliant idea!

                                  2. Once, while shopping kind of late at night, I saw a couple of college age men shuffling through the store with a case of soda and an open bag of Cheetos, heading down the cookie aisle. Both were wearing pajamas, and one had his bunny slippers on. The joys of living in a college town...

                                    2 Replies
                                    1. re: mpjmph

                                      I've seen people wearing pajamas too and other crazy outfits. Check this out. Unbelievable!(Warning: music is LOUD).

                                      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1TWrP...

                                      1. re: mpjmph

                                        My apartment building in college was next door to a Whole Foods - you didn't even have to leave the overhang from the lobby to enter the market. I don't think I ever shopped in anything BUT my pj's and slippers! LOL

                                      2. The other night my husband and I were in the Superstore Walmart or whatever it's called. We observed the following argument (at full outside-voice volume in the middle of the store):

                                        Wife: You don't even want to talk to me!
                                        Husband (while pushing a baby in a stroller): Why would I? You're such a b****!
                                        Wife: Shut up! Help me put this in the cart (mini fridge).

                                        Needless to say some older folks had gathered around and were watching as if it were a TV show.

                                        One of my girlfriends in university who is a dancer often tap danced down the aisles of the grocery store. I'm sure that turned a few heads!

                                        2 Replies
                                        1. re: ladooShoppe

                                          you've GOT to watch the video called "these are the people of walmart."

                                          1. re: alkapal

                                            That was hilarious. My OCD son was totally freaked out about the used stick antiperspirant.

                                        2. Oh and I once saw a woman pick up a sealed tub of margarine, open the package stick her finger inside and lick her finger afterwards. She was tasting the margarine to see if it was "her brand". I only buy butter now.

                                          1. Observing the serious fatties loading their carts with high-calorie crap then topping it off with a head of lettuce.

                                            6 Replies
                                            1. re: beevod

                                              And diet soda, too, I'd bet!

                                              1. re: ricepad

                                                I'm one of those people that orders a Diet Coke with a burger. I just prefer it :)

                                                1. re: CanadaGirl

                                                  I hate that common smug complaint about those who drink diet soda, as if calories are calories. Here's some news: some people may enjoy protein and fat ( meat) whilst disliking sugar...

                                                  1. re: Lizard

                                                    Yeah I always get an odd look from fast food servers about ordering a diet coke with my McDonald's or whatever crap I decided to eat that day. Regular Coke is just too sweet for my liking. Hurts my teeth. Plus the aftertaste of fountain diet coke is sooooooo good.

                                                  2. re: CanadaGirl

                                                    i get this... but a high school friend's older brother worked at mcdonald's. he said so often morbidly obese people would come in, order multiple combo meals, parfaits, cookies, and a supersized diet coke. it always used to crack him up. that said, my mom drank diet soda. i got used to the taste.

                                                2. re: beevod

                                                  the lettuce is a vehicle for ranch dressing, cheese, croutons, and Bacos brand bacon flavored salad topping

                                                3. I regularly see grown adults shopping in their pajamas and slippers. I just don't understand this. I can't imagine that wearing slippers as regular footwear would be comfortable.

                                                  I live in an area with a large Amish population (my local store has horse and buggy parking) and I find their carts interesting, lots of junky, sugar snacks, soda and convenience things like Lunchables.

                                                  I actively avoid the one clerk that comments on my purchases. She can't keep herself from judging my produce choices and items such as domestic shrimp, the prices offend her.

                                                  4 Replies
                                                  1. re: cleobeach

                                                    There was this one gas station in town that had these really good sausages that no one else had. I'd go about once a week to fill up the car, get it washed at their automated car wash thing, and while it was filling up, pick up a couple of their sausages.

                                                    One time, as I was about to pay for the sausages, the clerk looks at me and says, "Doesn't your wife pack you a lunch?"

                                                    I just looked at her, left the sausages on the counter, walked out and have never been back.

                                                    1. re: acgold7

                                                      Maybe that was her sad attempt at hitting on you?

                                                      1. re: hyacinthgirl

                                                        OH, jeez, I never thought of that. Ack.

                                                        1. re: acgold7

                                                          Or put another way, checking on your status.

                                                  2. I once heard a woman ask the produce guy "are you out of bananas?" And my friend and I waited with bated breath for the guy to burst into song, but he resisted somehow. Or maybe he was too young to know the song, but hell, so am I.

                                                    9 Replies
                                                    1. re: sciencediet

                                                      Oh, now THAT would have been the best response from the produce guy! LOL

                                                      1. re: sciencediet

                                                        Ha ha ha! That would have been great to see.

                                                        1. re: mrsfury

                                                          Reminds me of the produce scene in Animal House!

                                                          1. re: Motosport

                                                            "Vegetables are sensual. People are sensuous."

                                                        2. re: sciencediet

                                                          When I was working at a grocery store an elderly man was in the produce department looking for cracked corn. I blanked on where it was, but called to my friend Matt "Hey, Jimmy! where's the cracked corn?" and before he responded I yelled back "I don't care!" I think I offended the elderly gentleman, but I got a HUGE laugh out of it... whoops!

                                                          1. re: kubasd

                                                            LOL! Now I can't get that silly song outta my head.
                                                            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDdnRL...

                                                            1. re: kubasd

                                                              Not sure I believe you, but I don't care (and my name is NOT Jimmy)

                                                              1. re: 2roadsdiverge

                                                                We had a lot of fun at work, and the produce guy was another college student (i.e. not just another drone), so he got the reference

                                                              2. re: kubasd

                                                                kubasd, this made me literally laugh out loud -- so much that mr. alka is staring at me.

                                                            2. My mom has triangular rain hat. It's made of green felt with a red cardinal on it, then coated in plastic and trimmed with wavy black bric-a-brac. Years ago, my sweet adopted grandmother made it for her. It is one crazy-looking chapeau. When I was younger, I'd be mortified to see my mom show up in public wearing it.

                                                              One day, we're in the supermarket. A little boy spies my mom in her mad hat and exclaims to HIS mom excitedly, "Mommy! Mommy! Look at the clown!" She hushes him; we move to the next aisle. Then "Mommy! There she is again!"

                                                              And from recent history, someone started a page over the intercom with "YOOHOO! So-and-so, you have a call on line 1..." I cracked up right then and there.

                                                              4 Replies
                                                              1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                Please tell me the cardinal is perched on the top like a real bird.

                                                                1. re: cleobeach

                                                                  HA HA, no, it's encased in the plastic, but that would be even funnier! I will hafta take a picture. :)

                                                                  1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                    The little boy's comments made me laugh outloud.

                                                                    I am also delighted by the fact your mother wears the hat as part of her regular life.

                                                                    Speaking of amusing grocery store hats, there was a cart girl (early 20s) at my local store who would wear a poorly hand knitted hat made from rainbow yarn and it had a comically large pom-pon on top, so large it defied the laws of physics. I can't believe the weight of it didn't pull it off her head. No doubt her grandmother made it for her and she wore it proudly.

                                                                    1. re: cleobeach

                                                                      Rock on, cart girl! It is good to have hattitude! ;) So funny.

                                                              2. When Ben & Jerry came out with a new, short-time only flavor that I couldn't find in the ice cream section, I walked up to the service desk at Wegmans and asked the HS (or college, who knows) aged boy whether they had any shweaty balls. His reaction 'exCUSE ME?'

                                                                Made my day.

                                                                3 Replies
                                                                1. re: linguafood

                                                                  laughing to tears. Made my day. :-)

                                                                  1. re: linguafood

                                                                    Linguafood,
                                                                    You should have asked him again, but in German.

                                                                    1. re: Tripeler

                                                                      Nächstes Mal.

                                                                  2. To me, the funniest (or saddest) carts are in my local natural grocery store. Lots of "all natural" or organic kid stuff, sweetened cereals (but it's natural), meal bars, juices, packaged fruit cups, cookies, crackers, cheese puffs... pretty pricey junk food.

                                                                    1 Reply
                                                                    1. re: mcf

                                                                      Agree with this. But in the WF I used to go to, the carts did seem better than the carts I noticed in my regular store.

                                                                      I am learning new stores in a new town now.

                                                                    2. An upscale supermarket near my home advertised truffles during the holidays one year.
                                                                      Couldn't find them so I inquired of the department manager. "Oh," he replied "they came in
                                                                      but they're no good. I'm sending them back because they're all shriveled up." I asked to see
                                                                      them and he reluctantly brought them out. They were , well, - truffles - and I selected one
                                                                      only to arrive at the check-out to discover the registers were not programmed to handle that
                                                                      small a quantity at that high a price. What a circus ensued as numerous people tried to
                                                                      figure it out manually. I think I wound up getting a bargain, but I wasn't about to argue with
                                                                      them once they finally agreed. Said commentary on lack of product knowledge and math
                                                                      skills but a rather amusing scenario.

                                                                      1 Reply
                                                                      1. re: ferventfoodie

                                                                        I remember during the most recent truffle season, two guys in the produce dept elbowing each other and pointing at the price per pound ;)

                                                                        I get a lot of discussion when I go to the ethnic market to stock up on things for my dogs. People often want to know what I'm going to do with all that canned fish. I remember one guy shyly remarking, You must really like oatmeal. (Actually not, unless it's steel cut, which is not what I buy for the dogs.)

                                                                        Hey, I've got no problem with any of the comments or questions ... I think people should talk to each other more.

                                                                      2. There is a small grocery chain in my area that grew out of a family run dairy operation. As a result, the dairy section is large in relation to the rest of the store, though not really any bigger than you might find in a Shoprite or Pathmark.

                                                                        I've witnessed--on more than one occasion--people standing in front of the dairy case and saying "Look at all that milk they have", or "Wow, they must sell a lot of milk".

                                                                        It surprises me that this impresses them.... and one day my DH said (kind of loud) "Hey look... it's people who've never seen milk before!" Three other people cracked up, along with the two of us.

                                                                        1. At the Safeway on Edgware Road in London: A lady picked up a piece of wrapped meat out of the meat counter, read the price tag, and said, " 'E want four pound for this, do 'ee? Well, 'e can stick it up 'is 'ole, 'e can". Then she put it back. This happened in 1976 so I guess the L4 would now be about L13---the lady's invective must surely have intensified.

                                                                          1. Oh - one funny supermarket scene involved ME.

                                                                            While a large family involving lots of small kids was passing, I pulled a can off of a shelf, & a bunch of cans fell off all around me. One of the little boys turned around & went "HA HA" in the EXACT intonation of the bully from "The Simpsons". I thought my husband would die laughing.

                                                                            10 Replies
                                                                            1. re: Bacardi1

                                                                              I'm laughing with you... ;)

                                                                              One involving me, too...when I was much younger, I remember holding a gallon of milk by the handle and it was so cold it was getting hard to keep holding, so I kept shifting from hand to hand till I eventually dropped it and it gushed everywhere. It happened in the 80s, but till this day, I go out of my way to MAKE SPACE on the conveyor for people holding items behind me, especially if the items look heavy (or cold!). :)

                                                                              I also remember from college days, a wiseass boyfriend (I don't seem to attract any other kind) throwing items in the air for me to catch as we strolled through the supermarket...till I missed a can of Cheez Whiz and it started spewing all over the place. Whattascene!

                                                                              1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                Oh, I like that you make space! Once I was waiting to go through the express line at the end of a really difficult day, with a couple of heavy, cold items (honestly don't remember what) and the woman a couple of people ahead of me had some kind of issue that really delayed things. I was shifting my items back and forth in my hands. The woman in front me shuffled a couple of things out of the child seat portion of her basket, and said "Now honey, you put your things right here. You don't need to be holding that." I will literally never forget that-sometimes the small kindnesses have such a huge impact. I try to pay attention instead of zoning out or messing with my phone so I can do whatever I can (putting dividers in early, letting people who only have one item go ahead) to make sure everyone in line is a comfortable as possible, almost entirely because of this one woman.

                                                                                1. re: ErnieD

                                                                                  "Sometimes the small kindnesses have such a huge impact"--I couldn't agree with you more. Very nice!

                                                                                  1. re: ErnieD

                                                                                    When my son was about 5 weeks old, I went to the store to pick up a few things. He was not having a good day, and a smarter me would have just realized that and passed on the store. He screamed his way through frozen foods, and I took the time to feed him before I attempted checking out.

                                                                                    No dice. He was screaming in the line. I was just barely holding it together. Everyone in my line was a woman, and they all let me ahead of them to check out. They were all just so nice and sympathetic--I bawled right there in Kroger. That poor 18 year old bag boy.

                                                                                    1. re: sub_english

                                                                                      :)

                                                                                      1. re: sub_english

                                                                                        love that

                                                                                        1. re: sub_english

                                                                                          Touching when we are blessed with the "kindness of strangers."

                                                                                          1. re: sub_english

                                                                                            oh, that gives me an idea: the screaming child accessory -- when you just can't wait in line.

                                                                                          2. re: ErnieD

                                                                                            I had the exact same situation, this woman, piled her things on top of each other on the conveyor belt so I could rest my arms from the heavy load I was carrying. As it turned out, the woman in front of her delaying the line was a young mom who didn't have enough cash to cover all of her groceries and was red-faced-ly trying to figure out what to remove so she could afford the trip. Once I saw that (which I only noticed because I was able to sigh relief at not having to continue my weight lifting in line), as discreetly as I could, I walked up to the cashier and gave her my card to cover the woman's groceries. We all need a little extra help sometimes, pay it forward.

                                                                                            1. re: hyacinthgirl

                                                                                              We need a like button - no love!

                                                                                      2. One of my neighbors is quite discrete about her purchases at the market. She purposely gets up at 2 or 3 in the morning to do her shopping so that other people don't look at what she puts in her cart (or at least no people that she knows).

                                                                                        1. On the intercom at my Publix in Florida, Heaven's waiting room: "wet clean-up isle 9, incontinence section". Turned out to be a broken jar of Fannings bread and butter pickles.

                                                                                          1 Reply
                                                                                          1. re: Veggo

                                                                                            they actually said "incontinence section?" oh no!! LOL

                                                                                          2. Once in a while I run across someone who refuses to put their items on the conveyor belt at the checkout, they clutch them like they are fearful someone will steal their items.

                                                                                            33 Replies
                                                                                            1. re: redfish62

                                                                                              Haha, I've seen that too; what is up with that?! It's not like there's been a zombie apolcalypse or something.

                                                                                              Or what about the people who put the divider in front of your groceries and look at you as though you're going to try and scam them into paying for your stuff?

                                                                                              1. re: ladooShoppe

                                                                                                Yeah, sometimes I can't resist saying, "Oh, you weren't going to pay for mine, too?"

                                                                                                1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                  Right? Especially if they look at you with accusatory eyes. Hags.

                                                                                                  1. re: ladooShoppe

                                                                                                    so tempting to pull the divider out, then stare them down with a a simpsonesque HaHa

                                                                                                    1. re: KaimukiMan

                                                                                                      It's even more tempting to pull the divider out and poke them with it until they are convinced that they must pay for your groceries.

                                                                                                      1. re: ladooShoppe

                                                                                                        Too funny!

                                                                                                        1. re: cleobeach

                                                                                                          Oops. I do that all the time, not realizing it was perceived as being unfriendly or territorial. Or obnoxious. I intend it as a friendly, helpful gesture -- pushing my things up to give the person behind me space for theirs. Then, since often the dividers are way up the line, reaching ahead and putting one down for the person behind me. I usually get a "thank-you". Different strokes, I guess.

                                                                                                          1. re: peppergal

                                                                                                            Same here, peppergal. It's certainly customary where I am and seems to be more common courtesy than anything else. It is helpful and facilitates the overall process. But then, I guess some people like to take offence at anything and assume the worst of everyone. As you said, different strokes.

                                                                                                            I'll confess though that I do get annoyed by people who give me little space in the queue. It's not like pushing up against my back is going to make anything move faster. But I guess that makes me a 'hag'.

                                                                                                            1. re: Lizard

                                                                                                              I get annoyed when the person behind me in the line bumps me with their cart, I turn around and say "Don't hit me with your cart again."

                                                                                                              That's one of the great things about being a guy, you can say things like that.

                                                                                                              1. re: redfish62

                                                                                                                I'm a gal, and I say things like that too. Someone hits me with their cart, they will hear about it!

                                                                                                                1. re: iluvcookies

                                                                                                                  Wow. Not everything requires an immediate and angry retort that implies an "or else".
                                                                                                                  Ever heard of the term "an accident"?

                                                                                                                  1. re: Midknight

                                                                                                                    It's not an angry retort. If someone isn't looking where they are going and hits me, I shouldn't say anything?? Accident or not, it will be acknowledged so that hopefully, no one else gets hit with the same cart.

                                                                                                                    1. re: iluvcookies

                                                                                                                      I find that if I add the word "Please" to that remark, it works better.

                                                                                                                      1. re: iluvcookies

                                                                                                                        I would expect that before you even turned around the 'culprit' would have uttered an apology. surely they didn't do it on purpose - unless they asked for your phone number afterwards.

                                                                                                                        1. re: KaimukiMan

                                                                                                                          If I hit someone with my cart, I apologize immediately. But you would be surprised at the # of people who do not.
                                                                                                                          I turn around and look---if they apologize, then I say OK, it happens. But often enough, the person has no idea of what is going on. Most recently, a lady was so engrossed in Us Weekly that she bumped into me 3 times.

                                                                                                                          1. re: iluvcookies

                                                                                                                            then i agree... off with their heads!

                                                                                                                      2. re: Midknight

                                                                                                                        Yes but generally an accident results in "pardon me" or "excuse me" or "I'm sorry" immediately afterwards, someone hits me with their cart and I don't get at least an "excuse me" then there's no reason I should be polite towards them.

                                                                                                                        And there are people who will hit you with their cart three or four times while you are waiting in line.

                                                                                                                        1. re: redfish62

                                                                                                                          And, when you turn around and tell them that they've hit you with their cart, their answer is "yeah, so?"

                                                                                                                      3. re: iluvcookies

                                                                                                                        Last night the grocery store was packed (check out lines halfway down the aisles). At the same time, the staff was moving crates everywhere. Very chaotic.
                                                                                                                        One staff member was moving a stack of crates taller than she was and bumped my cart. In turn, my cart bumped the woman in front of me. I immediately apologized to the woman (even though it was not my fault) but the woman still looked at me like she wanted to kill me. Why are some people so aggressive?

                                                                                                                        1. re: inexorablyfabulous

                                                                                                                          Sigh... I wish I knew. It's rather unpleasant.

                                                                                                                  2. re: peppergal

                                                                                                                    I've always done this too. I was brought up viewing this as a common courtesy which helps keep the line moving which benefits every one. Many of the automatic conveyers just jam everything together and often the clerk just keeps ringing them up - the divider keeps that from happening. Plus many markets have few dividers and the clerks often don't push them down to the point where the next person can easily reach it.

                                                                                                                    Same as allowing a car to merge into a lane, holding a door, letting a person with one item go ahead of your large order, etc. There are people who get where these gestures are coming from and appreciate them. I guess if you expect insults then you view everything from that pov....

                                                                                                        2. re: ladooShoppe

                                                                                                          I had that the other day - I put the divider down and put my things on the belt, but obviously still too close for the lady in front of me. She turned around and used the divider to push my things further back. I felt like standing as close to her as possible, but just let it go.

                                                                                                          1. re: ultimatepotato

                                                                                                            I put the divider down all the time, so I can get started unloading my cart. I really don't notice any hostility from others over this. I would expect others to do same as my stuff goes down to b rung up. In 42 years of grocery shopping I've never seen any of these behaviors at checkout.

                                                                                                            I have noticed other stuff, like an argumentative coupon lady who stuck her rear end out at us as we waited for her to get her way, but never any of territorial actions or glaring.

                                                                                                            1. re: ultimatepotato

                                                                                                              I have been known to use the bar to push the groceries behind mine further back. I do not trust the herky-jerky motion of the belt to keep those two-liter bottles of soda from falling on top of my eggs and bread.

                                                                                                              1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                Might you not then be either making the two-litre bottles more unstable or crushing the next person's eggs and bread?

                                                                                                                1. re: CanadaGirl

                                                                                                                  So, I am to leave things as is and have the bottles fall on my purchases and have the bread and eggs crushed, thereby creating a mess on the conveyer belt and making me have to go back and pick up another loaf of bread and another dozen of eggs? The next person is the person behind me who inconsiderately placed the bottles of soda directly behind my groceries. If they now fall forward, no mess. If the person behind me doesn't adjust his purchases and the soda falls backward on their bread and eggs, so be it.

                                                                                                                  1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                    I think you are reading malicious intent where there really is none. If I had my groceries crushed because the person in front of me pushed everything back, I would say something, and probably not very pleasantly. If, on the other hand, my groceries damaged those of the person ahead of me, I would be mortified and fix the situation.

                                                                                                                    But, realistically, how often does the fall happen? Might it not be more polite to simply say something along the lines of "The two litre bottles make me nervous. Do you mind if I lay them down so they don't fall on my eggs?". I would think that any reasonable person would be fine with that request. If I was asked that, I would likely just pick them up and put them elsewhere so that nothing can happen.

                                                                                                                    1. re: CanadaGirl

                                                                                                                      I see bottles fall over all the time. That is why I lay the bottles down. I've had bottles falls onto my grocery purchase previously. I am not reading malicious intent, I am being cautious. If the person behind me is not considerate enough to make sure that my purchase is not damaged by his purchase, I will make the correction myself.

                                                                                                                    2. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                      If you're so worried, why don't you put the eggs and bread at the front of your purchases? Our grocery store cashier always puts the "delicate" things to the side to be bagged separately.

                                                                                                                      1. re: gourmanda

                                                                                                                        Because everybody knows that fragile items go last in the order.

                                                                                                                        1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                          "everybody" sounds a bit too inclusive.

                                                                                                                          1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                            Guess we're lucky to have helpful cashiers and baggers. Sorry that you don't.

                                                                                                              2. re: redfish62

                                                                                                                I encountered someone like that very recently at Whole Foods. I accidentally took her cart instead of mine and she came after me screaming and accusing me of stealing her stuff. Since I didn't want to upset a possibly mentally ill person any further, I just apologized, but I really wanted to point out that none of it actually belonged to either one of us yet.

                                                                                                              3. I was at a Save Mart in California in the late evening and came across this scene. I found it amusing, although I still don't know what the purpose was.

                                                                                                                 
                                                                                                                8 Replies
                                                                                                                1. re: juliejulez

                                                                                                                  The Ritz Guards keeping a lookout?

                                                                                                                  1. re: LindaWhit

                                                                                                                    They're very protective of the yogurt.

                                                                                                                    1. re: juliejulez

                                                                                                                      I'm hearing the Palace Guards marching "song" in the Wizard of Oz as an earworm. Which then segued into Morris Day and Time's "Jungle Love."

                                                                                                                      DAMN YOU, juliejulez!!! ;-)

                                                                                                                  2. re: juliejulez

                                                                                                                    bowling??

                                                                                                                    1. re: juliejulez

                                                                                                                      I recently saw this at the local T&T Grocery store in my neighbourhood.

                                                                                                                       
                                                                                                                      1. re: ladooShoppe

                                                                                                                        now THAT is what i have been looking for -- assorted guts. i am so sick of the uniform guts i've been forced to buy.

                                                                                                                        1. re: ladooShoppe

                                                                                                                          Awesome sign!

                                                                                                                          1. re: ladooShoppe

                                                                                                                            I have a long standing fantasy of going to the grocery store in my very southern, very rural home town and arranging the pig parts anatomically. My best friend and I have half-jokingly talked about opening a market selling locally produced meat products, including custom built pig and cow shaped refrigerators to accommodate anatomical arrangements. A girl can dream...

                                                                                                                        2. The first weekend when the college students arrive at (a particularly expensive and exclusive) university near us, the grocery store is always very busy and often hysterical.

                                                                                                                          Girl gazing around soup shelves, to mother: "What kind of soup do I like?"

                                                                                                                          Boy to mother: "Do I use shaving soap?"

                                                                                                                          4 Replies
                                                                                                                          1. re: lemons

                                                                                                                            Oh the grocery store on move in weekend... I swear, I take move in weekend preparation more seriously than hurricanes or ice storms. I will not go to the grocery store on move in weekend or the first weekend after Christmas break. Actually, I get the hell out of town on those weekends if at all possible. I've seen the clueless. I have also seen parent/student arguments about exactly how much cereal is needed between Labor Day and Thanksgiving.

                                                                                                                            1. re: lemons

                                                                                                                              That could be my husband, asking ME. ;-)

                                                                                                                              1. re: lemons

                                                                                                                                Oh, I *hope* I get calls like that someday!

                                                                                                                                "Yes, dear, your favorite soup is cream of rutabaga.." "No, son, but you do use Preparation H so stock up on that."

                                                                                                                                1. re: lemons

                                                                                                                                  Not to mention carts full of brooms and mops, propelled by said students, careening through the aisles.

                                                                                                                                2. I always get a kick out of people who don't realize that once their groceries on the conveyor hit the light sensor, that the conveyor will automatically stop.

                                                                                                                                  I once saw some guy with a load of groceries (gallon of milk, produce, cereal boxes, etc) scambling to move their stuff back because they think it's going all push off into the cashier's lap. At one point he actually threw his chest over the conveyor and wrapped his arms around everything he was purchasing to try and hold them still while the conveyor was still going. What a struggle!

                                                                                                                                  Then the look on his face when the cashier plopped down a divider and it all haulted was priceless! LOL

                                                                                                                                  1 Reply
                                                                                                                                  1. re: Novelli

                                                                                                                                    "man down, register 3!" STAT!

                                                                                                                                  2. The closest thing to funny I can think of that has happened to me recently, was in the artisan bread area of WF. I saw a woman enter the store and walk purposefully down an aisle and saw her again in the bread area, where nice loaves of bread are placed in open bags. There were samples placed on a shelf behind them. The woman stationed herself in front of the samples, and began eating them. She would barely let another woman get one of the samples to give her child. She ate one then another, and she was looking right at the stuff as if she was on a mission. I moved away. I certainly didn't want to get between the bread samples and her!

                                                                                                                                    Later I saw her buy a couple of items and leave. She was making small talk with the checkers. I might be wrong, but it seemed like the looks on their faces was not all that friendly.

                                                                                                                                    I don't know if she was a mooch or if she was in dire need of lunch.

                                                                                                                                    2 Replies
                                                                                                                                    1. re: sueatmo

                                                                                                                                      Sounds like she was abstaining from eating carbs but needed to satisy an overwhelming craving without having to buy a loaf, and have it tempting her later on at home. LOL!

                                                                                                                                      1. re: letsindulge

                                                                                                                                        "I stopped buying bread months ago...why am I not losing more weight??"

                                                                                                                                    2. Every weekend when the following Monday is a holiday, people grocery shop like the apocalypse is upon them. Never understood that. Even the announcement of a snow storm (nothing lasting beyond a day or so) will make people stock up like WW III is coming. Nuts.

                                                                                                                                      8 Replies
                                                                                                                                      1. re: linguafood

                                                                                                                                        Here in New England, ALL the grocery stores are closed on Easter Sunday (I don't remember that being the case anywhere else I've ever lived.) Meaning no disrepect to anyone else's religion, I find it deeply annoying, not least because that Saturday the stores are an absolute nightmare. I'm Jewish, and one of these years I'm going to organize all my Jewish and Muslim friends and offer to staff a store ourselves.

                                                                                                                                        1. re: sciencediet

                                                                                                                                          Major grocers in StL are also closed on Easter Sunday. Also Christmas and New Year's Day. I think it is a union agreement with management.

                                                                                                                                        2. re: linguafood

                                                                                                                                          Most of our snow events only last a day or two, but everyone over the age of 25 remembers the time we went to bed expecting 2 inches, and woke to find 20+. Major snowfalls are so rare here, we only have enough equipment to clear interstates and primary roads, and even that can take a day or two. Secondary streets usually thaw on their own before the plows can get to them. A day or two stuck at home is no big deal, but two feet of snow left us stranded for more than a week. By the end of the week, we were running out of palatable food. We weren't going to starve, but it certainly wasn't fun. Anytime we have snow in the forecast now, I'll go ahead and do a week's worth of grocery shopping. If ice is in the forecast, I buy things I can heat over Sterno.

                                                                                                                                          1. re: mpjmph

                                                                                                                                            Well, I live in a fairly suburban town (if surrounded by cows), so it's really not that much of an issue, mostly.

                                                                                                                                            It snowed exactly twice last winter. But that was a weird one.

                                                                                                                                          2. re: linguafood

                                                                                                                                            I find the worst to be the day before a hurricane is scheduled to hit. People seem to be preparing for two weeks of no power, which is completely unrealistic where I am (Nova Scotia).

                                                                                                                                            1. re: linguafood

                                                                                                                                              Yes, I know! Especially the last day before Thanksgiving or Christmas. Everyone seems to look dead serious, stressed or long-faced (and with a giant turkey in the cart). Come on, it's a holiday that is coming up, people.

                                                                                                                                              1. re: linguafood

                                                                                                                                                Although, I do sometimes find shoppers to be in a pretty good mood when the store is slammed. I guess that since they can see the store is really busy, it's not really anybody's fault that the lines are long and so are willing to be patient.

                                                                                                                                                1. re: linguafood

                                                                                                                                                  During the riot here last year, I went to my local supermarket to get dinner. It was the afternoon before they were doubling or tripling the amount of Police out on the streets, and a lot of places in North and East London had closed early and boarded up. My local Tesco was one of the few places still open. I was surrounded by people throwing canned goods and bottled water into shopping carts. The checkout lines went almost the length of the aisles. Local kids were walking in, grabbing chocolate bars and then walking out. And the whole time I was standing in queue with a pizza and a bottle of discounted sparkling wine, thinking "oh, I didn't realise that the apocolypse was coming".

                                                                                                                                                2. I'm at our neighborhood Wegman's several times a week, but will only go on weekends if we are in dire need. Saturdays and Sundays are filled with what we jokingly refer to as "tourists". They're not regulars and get the big, ankle killer carts, wandering in amazement across the aisles. They're always going the wrong direction (often in circles), in parties of 2 or more, and have a habit of stopping dead in their tracks to ooh and ahh at whatever catches their attention. They make it very difficult for those of us trying to get in and get out.

                                                                                                                                                  One Saturday I was in the market with my then 9-yr old daughter and we found ourselves behind just such a couple. They stopped to look around and decide where to go next, oblivious to the fact that they were completely blocking the way of several people behind them. As we managed to navigate around them, my exasperated 9-yr old, in full playground voice, huffed, "TOURIST!!".

                                                                                                                                                  I was so embarrassed I've not used that term in front of my kids since.

                                                                                                                                                  4 Replies
                                                                                                                                                  1. re: Christina D

                                                                                                                                                    That's OK, your kids are taking careful mental notes on other terms you use, however innocent out of context. I remember my old boss telling me how he was aggravated stuck behind someone in traffic, grumbling, "C'mon, pal!" and his little boy asking, "Dad, is that your pal?" :)

                                                                                                                                                    1. re: Christina D

                                                                                                                                                      Wegman Tourists, too funny!

                                                                                                                                                      The Wegman's by my mom's house is in an affluent area and is clogged with women and retirees of both genders strolling about with a giant coffees in one hand chattering into the cell phone with the other. I don't think they are there to shop, they are just killing time. They drive me nuts because I have a limited amount of time to get in and get out and a set routine. When they stop short in front of me to oggle the sushi, they are in danger of me banging into them.

                                                                                                                                                      My mom will only go very early in the morning.

                                                                                                                                                      1. re: cleobeach

                                                                                                                                                        OMG, ,Cleo...I think we go to the same Wegman's. You've described mine perfectly (especially the sushi oggle-ers).

                                                                                                                                                        When it first opened and was innundated with newbies (myself included), I used to time my visits to go before the buses from the retirement communities got there. Bless their hearts, but those folks could clog an aisle like nobody's business. If I waited until after, I got stuck in the lunch rush. :o\

                                                                                                                                                      2. re: Christina D

                                                                                                                                                        When my specialty grocery store opened, there were literally tourists (no carts, just there to gaze) for at least the first year. After church on Sunday was very popular. They loved to stand in the middle of the meat and seafood area, taking up as much square footage as possible. I was so pleased when they'd all seen enough ...

                                                                                                                                                      3. My mother was unable to shop due to some surgery and I helped out a few times. She asked me to get some salmon for my father's and her dinner. At the fish counter of her supermarket, I asked for 12 oz. of salmon and the mid-20-ish guy behind the counter looked at me blankly and said, "we only sell things by the pound here."

                                                                                                                                                        3 Replies
                                                                                                                                                        1. re: Terrie H.

                                                                                                                                                          I've encountered this at bakeries too. One place I like has very good biscotti, so occasionally I will get a coffee and 2-3 of them for a snack. One of the counterpeople looked at me like I was crazy, why do I only want 3 biscotti? She honestly didn't know how to charge me for them. I calmly told her to put 3 biscotti in a small bag and put them on the scale, and I would pay for them by weight--exactly as I would if I were to buy a pound. She finally did it, but she was very confused by the whole thing.

                                                                                                                                                          1. re: iluvcookies

                                                                                                                                                            When I walk with my daughter to a nearby bakery, I usually give her a roll or cookie from a self serve basket. The youngish woman at the counter counted the rolls in the bag and told me I had 8. I corrected her and said I had nine, that the baby was holding one. The owner came out from the back and had to explain to her that the roll in the baby's hand was the ninth roll. In the end, he only charged me for 8. Nice guys... They usually don't charge me for whatever the kid has stuffed in her mouth!

                                                                                                                                                            1. re: cheesecake17

                                                                                                                                                              No child left behind....

                                                                                                                                                        2. At a store in an upscale area I saw a woman wearing hair rollers. The scarf she wore didn’t cover them completely and the bright pink rollers were clearly seen. It was so comical that I nearly burst out laughing in the store. When I told a friend about it she said, “Sometimes I wear them to the store too.” Oops.

                                                                                                                                                          1. Probably the funniest experience happened last year at a local Kroger store (Michigan). I was pretty broke and decided it was time to amp up the coupon use. I had a handful of them and was finding what I needed, but one brand, for which I had a very generous coupon, was proving to be a problem. It was Chock Full 'o Nuts coffee. Not my favorite brand, but I couldn't really afford to be picky. No Chock Full 'o Nuts in the coffee aisle. Oh well.

                                                                                                                                                            As I was heading toward the cash registers, totally by chance, I used the snack aisle. You guessed it.... there was a stack of Chock Full 'o Nuts cans right there between the Planters peanuts and the dry roasted almonds.

                                                                                                                                                            4 Replies
                                                                                                                                                            1. re: juliasqueezer

                                                                                                                                                              DING DING DING!!!! I think we have a winner!

                                                                                                                                                              1. re: iluvcookies

                                                                                                                                                                Why thank you!!

                                                                                                                                                              2. re: juliasqueezer

                                                                                                                                                                Hilarious!

                                                                                                                                                                1. re: juliasqueezer

                                                                                                                                                                  Too funny!

                                                                                                                                                                2. just yesterday, a woman at harris teeter was eating something she had obviously picked up in the store, handing the foil wrapper to the check-out guy to ring up. she was chewing like a cow, even as she stood paying the guy. she then asked him for a price check on the shredded cheese she had. i guess she couldn't eat that in the store as well, and she left it there.

                                                                                                                                                                  ~~~~~~~
                                                                                                                                                                  i told mr. alka that if i EVER say that i'm going to the harris teeter on sunday at noon, then he is to smack me hard in the head five times. and if i come back up, to do it again. it is like a drone swarm with all manner of wandering, blocking, clueless men, women and children (with those FREAKING mini-carts). "oh look, i'm helping mommy!" that's after the kid has dragged his little slobbery hand over the samples in the fruit section. "mmm, i like these oranges!" "oh, look mommy, here are some strawberries!" i'm fantasizing thinking that a modified snow blade might be attached to the front of my cart. "oops! sorry, madam!"

                                                                                                                                                                  ~~~~~~~
                                                                                                                                                                  another harris teeter story: deli guy was new on the job and apparently nobody had bothered to train him about what could go on the breakfast sandwich. he was like a panicked squirrel, turning this way and that to get another counterman's attention to rescue him. he was so clueless that one finally took pity on him, relieved him of the onerous task of understanding simple directions, and sent him to make the prepared garden salads. i can imagine what was going through his head: "two slices cucumber, three cherry tomatoes, two slices cucumber, three cherry tomatoes…..um, uh oh, wait a minute!"

                                                                                                                                                                  11 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                    Those mini carts. Thank god shoprite doesn't have those or all hell would break loose every time we would enter the store!!

                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: cheesecake17

                                                                                                                                                                      i have a hard enough time dealing with the boorish oblivious behavior of other people's children and their lack of discipline. these mini-carts send me... IMO, they're everything that's wrong with our society... as a kid, you needn't be doing *everything* mommy or daddy does. you sit in the damn big cart, getting wheeled around backwards, and suck on a carrot. the rest of us did it; so can you. ...end of rant.

                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: Emme

                                                                                                                                                                        And don't forget the 'humvee" carts, the carts that have the ride-in cars attached to the fronts of them. Nine times out of ten the parent pushing the cart has is a worse driver than their kid who's sitting in the car. Those carts are too long and cumbersome.

                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                          My daughter loves the cart with the wheelie mobile in the front! My store only has a few, so I rarely put her in. It's a "special treat" kind of thing for when we're with my husband and the store is empty ish. But, yes, very difficult to maneuver!

                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: cheesecake17

                                                                                                                                                                            It isn't quite the plot against sanity that someone up thread rants about. I've never seen a squealing, miserable kid in the store pushing these little carts. I've seen 9,000 kids that are screaming (I've been shopping a long time) in other circumstances. If you have to scoot around 4 year olds and it's the worst part of your day --- really?

                                                                                                                                                                            How many times have you said "we have to involve our children in how our meals are made" in order to interest them? It starts with shopping.

                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: Terrie H.

                                                                                                                                                                              I agree tht eating a good meal starts with the shopping, but there's a time And place for everything.

                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: cheesecake17

                                                                                                                                                                                And it's not Saturday morning in Trader Joe's...

                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: suzyqmit

                                                                                                                                                                                  At least trader joes gives out samples and stickers!

                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: suzyqmit

                                                                                                                                                                                    I do feel for people who can only shop on Saturday mornings at any grocery store. It takes patience, for sure.

                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: Terrie H.

                                                                                                                                                                                      Saturday morning are actually pretty light with the crowds. No lines up, and you're in and out pretty quick.

                                                                                                                                                                                      Now Saturday AFTERNOONS...well, that's an experience just this side of Hell.

                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: Midknight

                                                                                                                                                                                        The Great Wall opened right around the corner about a year ago and they don't have adequate parking (I live in a suburb in DC with a big Asian community). There is actually a line of cars on the main road trying to just get in the parking lot on Saturdays. SO glad I can shop on other days!

                                                                                                                                                                    2. Shopping at a local supermarket: Daughter was two years old at the time, walking through the aisles her hand holding onto the cart. Turned into one aisle where there was a tall good-looking fellow stocking the shelves. Darling well behaved Daughter leaves the cart, runs to the tall good-looking shelf stocker, wraps her arms around his leg at knee high level and yells, "Daddy!".
                                                                                                                                                                      Don't know who was more embarrassed... me or the shelf stocker...

                                                                                                                                                                      4 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: Gio

                                                                                                                                                                        OMG, that is hysterical!!!

                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: Gio

                                                                                                                                                                          Nice pick-up tactic.

                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: Gio

                                                                                                                                                                            That is truly hilarious!!!! My friend tells of her first born's earliest words in the grocery store when she saw a neighbor and stopped to talk -- he kept saying "beer" "beer"

                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: Gio

                                                                                                                                                                              Too funny!!

                                                                                                                                                                            2. Had to be me last week. While heading to the register another customer cut me off and my cart had nowhere to go but into the display rack holding those silvery "icy-hot" bags.

                                                                                                                                                                              Ever try to corral those babies up? Think styrofoam packing peanuts--the more you sweep, the more they fly away!! The phrase 'herding cats' also comes to mind...

                                                                                                                                                                              Luckily a kind hearted cashier came to my rescue before the entire section came to a complete stand-still....

                                                                                                                                                                              1. This has never happened to me before... At the 'digital-check-out' at the grocery store.. the couple in front of me left ~$9-10 jar of organic peanut-butter. I have always wanted to try that particular brand... and maybe this is stupid... BUT I turned it into the checkout-manager person instead of accepting it as a free-gift.

                                                                                                                                                                                The manager definitely put it with the re-stock pile.. but I would have felt criminal if I had taken it. It was the 'right' thing to do.--Anyone else have this happen?

                                                                                                                                                                                7 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: GraceW

                                                                                                                                                                                  Grace, I don't think honesty is stupid.

                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: GraceW

                                                                                                                                                                                    it wasn't a free gift. it was someone else's purchase. i'll bet they came back to the store when they realized they left it. you did the right thing.

                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                      I felt extremely bad for them--because they also didn't take their receipt. :(

                                                                                                                                                                                      A lot of econ classes (of yester-year) ingrained in my mind "there is no such thing as free-lunch."... there is always a cost or resultant effect (although sometimes unseen) to everything.

                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: GraceW

                                                                                                                                                                                        they must've been in some hurry to get outta there! LOL

                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                          It seems there was this really obnoxiously pushy lady behind them....

                                                                                                                                                                                          (JK, GraceW!)

                                                                                                                                                                                    2. re: GraceW

                                                                                                                                                                                      The customers may well have gone back to pick up their peanut butter when they realized they hadn't gotten home with it. You did the right thing. Absolutely.

                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: sueatmo

                                                                                                                                                                                        if i paid 8 bucks for peanut butter, i sure would.

                                                                                                                                                                                    3. Earlier today, I ran out to the little Italian market down the street from me. I'm waiting in line when, all of a sudden, I hear a rustling. Something golden brown, about the size of a football, appears to be moving near my feet, just a few feet away. In a panic, I involuntarily grab the arm of the elderly gentleman in front of me...only to start laughing like a nut when I realize A WRAPPED LOAF OF BREAD has taken a dive from the countertop. Though it made no sense, for a hot second, I thought a small animal was running through the store!

                                                                                                                                                                                      1. At the grocery store today, I bought some frozen octopus. This is a store where I normally avoid the fresh fish (it's never good), so I've really ignored the frozen seafood as well. I only noticed a few days ago that they had octopus at all. At the checkout, the cashier started quizzing me as soon as he saw it. "Do you eat this?". Um. Yes. "Is it chewy?" Well, kind of... . "You have to know how to cook it, don't you?". Yes. "How do you cook it?". Well, you can boil it, grill it, or stew it in wine. "I've been working here three years, and I've only seen someone buy this twice. That includes you!".

                                                                                                                                                                                        Hmmm. Yeah, that's why I don't normally by seafood here.

                                                                                                                                                                                        1. yesterday i saw a grown woman pushing the kiddy cart full of groceries, bending down to reach the handle. i guess her five year old daughter had tired of shopping.

                                                                                                                                                                                          15 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                            no birth control? ya gotta paaay to plaaay.

                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: Veggo

                                                                                                                                                                                              Perhaps she had some physical problem or difficulty that made the smaller cart more appropriate and easier to use!

                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: OCEllen

                                                                                                                                                                                                nah, she was physically fine. i guess she was having some play time with her little girl, who at least was a pleasant little girl and not cranky (thank goodness). after all, it was 8 something in the evening. my mom would have never been out that late at the grocery (back then, our grocery probably wasn't even open past 7 or 8), but that was a different era (70's).

                                                                                                                                                                                            2. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                              To be honest, I've wondered if maybe it might be fun to just use a kiddy-cart for a change. HEY, if prices soar... a kiddy-cart would be an easy way to get my grocery-bill down: "Hmm... it doesn't fit. Looks like no eggs this week."

                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: GraceW

                                                                                                                                                                                                And.........you could actually afford to purchase a cartload of groceries!

                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: GraceW

                                                                                                                                                                                                  and we can all use the kiddy carts to buy those reduced package sizes! LOL!!! it is the same concept as using a small plate to feel like the plate is full with less food (yeah, who buys that?!).

                                                                                                                                                                                                  on a tangent, i heard of a "study" to the effect that people who eat with smaller forks actually eat MORE, thinking they have to compensate in more forkfuls for the smaller size. now that is funny. i don't think any of these psychological games with food really work, do they?

                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                    I have a friend who always eats dessert with a tiny spoon so he can get more bites. Works for him.

                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: sciencediet

                                                                                                                                                                                                      demitasse spoon? coke spoon? LOL

                                                                                                                                                                                                    2. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                      duhhhh... what's a kiddy cart?

                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: KaimukiMan

                                                                                                                                                                                                        A minitiature, child-sized shopping cart. Many stores have carts with pennants atop metal poles so that adults won't run them over.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        http://www.alibaba.com/product-gs/310...

                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                          harris teeter kiddy carts have the pennants that announce "shopper in training."

                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                            thanks Vidute and alkapal.

                                                                                                                                                                                                            good grief, my brother and i weren't even allowed to ask for things in the store let alone walk around with our own carts. imagine how much of what ends up in those carts will have to be re-stocked, if it hasn't melted all over the place. i shudder at the thought.

                                                                                                                                                                                                    3. re: GraceW

                                                                                                                                                                                                      If I tried that my chiropractic bill would more than offset my grocery savings!

                                                                                                                                                                                                    4. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                      I'm trying to imagine the day that my mother would have taken us grocery shopping with her.......

                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: KSlink

                                                                                                                                                                                                        i always went shopping with my mom. there were no kiddy carts back in the day, and i often had a separate regular cart, as i shopped for my grandparents at the same time my mom shopped for us. heh heh, they never carded me -- what was i, like maybe 12? -- when i bought my grandaddy's muscatel wine (and canned peaches, and cream, cereal, apples, coffee, etc)! people had some common sense (plus, i was with my mommy!)!

                                                                                                                                                                                                    5. Several years ago at a local farmer's market the lady who ran the Ostrich meat stand, and someone I purchased from regularly, had a young couple of lookyloos who were baffled by the Ostrich soap. They asked the nice Ostrich lady, "what is Ostrich soap made from?", the reply, "Oil from the Ostrich", "How do you get oil from an Ostrich?", big smile "You squeeze them very hard." The young couple nodded in agreement and carried on.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: vanderb

                                                                                                                                                                                                        Luv it!

                                                                                                                                                                                                      2. This took place @ Ben's Deli in Jerico LI which was my usual stop for a nice pastrami sammich on my way up to visit my sweetie in Albany. I'd do my best to eat it in the car and not make too much of a mess. I've had some of my most memorable meals in my car.
                                                                                                                                                                                                        While waiting for the counterman to create his pastrami masterpiece an upscale woman wearing a fancy mink coat walks in and tells the cashier she called in an order.
                                                                                                                                                                                                        With a total "straight face", like he'd done it a hundred times, the cashier calls out to one of the countermen: "Bernie, Mrs. Melman is here for her hot tongue!" Then Bernie calls out: "Murray, do you have the hot tongue for Mrs. Melman?"
                                                                                                                                                                                                        It went on and on like a choreographed comedy routine from the Catskills!!
                                                                                                                                                                                                        Mrs. Melman was either in on it or totally clueless since she never reacted.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        5 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: Motosport

                                                                                                                                                                                                          LOL!

                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: Spice_zing

                                                                                                                                                                                                            +1, that's priceless!

                                                                                                                                                                                                          2. re: Motosport

                                                                                                                                                                                                            I. Love. This. :-D

                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: LindaWhit

                                                                                                                                                                                                              LW...her is another but true incident in the supermarket....When my daughters were young, (real young still able to fit in the shopping cart) we were concerned about forming their eating habbits...My wife had a brother that was obese, and so were his kids, due to junk food as a substanial part fo their diet. We felt that everything can be consumed , but in moderation, and I must say that today, I continue with that philosphy.
                                                                                                                                                                                                              Well, my daughter is sitting there , we are in the snack aisle....she is just sitting there quietly with her head cocked slightly to the side, watching.....I return to the cart and make our way to the end of the aisle....we pass some other shoppers, then she says " Daddy, that mommy must eat a lot of cookies"!...I pushed on embarassed, or for but the words from the lips of babes!

                                                                                                                                                                                                            2. re: Motosport

                                                                                                                                                                                                              SO Funny! And I would love some of Mrs. Melman's hot tongue for myself - that sounds good:)

                                                                                                                                                                                                            3. When I was about 5 yrs old I was at the grocery store with my Mom, standing in an aisle with the cart between us - she's holding onto the handle browsing the shelves as I'm holding onto the end basket. Next to me a little further down the aisle is another Mother and her daughter who appeared to be about my age. This little girl was trying her Mom's attention and she.was.persistent. Mom...mom....mom....mom....over and over and over again, with the Mother just ignoring her. In the meantime, MY Mom must've thought it was me she was hearing in her ear as she looked at items on the shelf. My Mom begins casually responding.... "What.....what.....whaaat...." and I can tell she's getting frustrated herself as *I* am not answering her. Finally my Mom has had enough and she bellers out while turning to look at me "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!?!?!" The Other Mother, Little Girl and I just stared at her as it dawned on my Mom what'd happened. She then whirled the cart around and stomped me out of that aisle to continue shopping.

                                                                                                                                                                                                              5 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: Mutch2Do

                                                                                                                                                                                                                HA HA HA! You made me think of an irritated-looking mom I saw drive by with her son in the supermarket parking lot today. While I'm not a lip reader, I distinctly SAW her say the words "STOP IT!" and had to chuckle.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  I saw a frazzled mom with three whiny little ones in the grocery store late this afternoon. She was doing her best to make them behave, but they weren't cooperating. When I last saw her, she was in the parking lot, dragging one little boy toward the car as he was crying loudly, "I WASN'T terrible! I WASN'T terrible!"

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: marisold

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    that made me laugh out loud, and immediately think of one of my nieces and her younger son!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  2. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Whew, then it wasn't me because had it been, you'd have lip read explicatives. Driving with one or both of my squabbling, sulky teens tends to bring that on.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: tcamp

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      HA HA HA HA! Though I'm not a parent, I feel your pain! Those are kinda easy to lip read, too. :)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                2. The Food Detective. A lady came into the grocery store with her magnifying glass in hand. It tickled me so I had to say something. I said, “What a great idea! I’m gonna have to start bringing one too! She replied, “It really helps me read the small print on the labels. I have my glasses but this works better.” She may be on to something.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: Spice_zing

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    she is definitely on to something -- esp. as my aging eyes find really annoying these two things (pet peeves on packaging): very small fonts, and odd, non-contrasting print (like white print on a yellow background). GRRR!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  2. I was buying a carton of eggs at the market when the bagger asked me in a really excited voice, "Heeeey! Have you ever had hard boiled eggs?"

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    I replied, "Yes, and I'll probably hard boil some of these."

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Then he said, "They're SOO good, right?"

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Yes. Yes they are. I really like eggs, but I've never met someone with so much zeal for a hard boiled egg.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: PandanExpress

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Was he HIGH?! ;)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: PandanExpress

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        i'm more shocked that he *asked* you if you've ever had hard-boiled eggs... well, i guess it could have been worse. he could have asked you if you knew what they were, and then suggested you try them...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: PandanExpress

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          I don't know if this was the case with your bagger, but several years ago there was a young man at one of the stores where I shop who was challenged. As he would bag groceries, he would always strike up a conversation when he saw that you had purchased something that he liked. As with your bagger, this young man would become excited, too. He seemed to always have a smile and his absolute joy was infectious. No matter if I had entered that store as a grumpy gus, I would always leave the store with a smile.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Aww, you know, that may well be. I like your theory better than mine--and it makes much more sense. :)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Yes, one of the two big chains in St. Louis hires from a local workshop for their bagging folks. Always makes me smile, too.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            2. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                              I've seen that a several stores too. Nice!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                He was a young man and I think the likely scenario was what kattyeyes guessed: he was high off his rocker. I guess if I had a boring job like a bagger, I'd get high too.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: PandanExpress

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Remember the scene in Shawshank Redemption with Morgan Freeman? (bagging in a supermarket, on parole?)..

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Ever since then and yes have encountered on several occasions persons doing the bagging, that , well seemed different , am real glad when I get the assistance because it does make the line move faster, (and I know someone might feel good doing it for us!)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                2. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  There is a non-profit in my town that provides work training and independent living support for adults with disabilities and/or mental illness. Both of my primary grocery stores hire baggers from the group. I've watched several really blossom and come into their own over the years, and I deliberately go to their lines when I can.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: mpjmph

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    It is truly remarkable that nearly EVERY human being will improve and give off good feelings to others when they realize they are useful to others in society. The damaging effects of unemployment are far greater than many of us realize.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                              2. I used to work at a liquor store so I have a few of these. We once chased a junkie out of the place for stealing a bottle of Boone’s Farm Strawberry, but the next day he came right back in and tried to buy something like a normal customer. We cashiers gave each other a WTF look and the conversation went something like this:

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Cashier: Get the hell out, you stole from us yesterday. What makes you think you’re welcome here?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Junkie: It wasn’t me, it was another guy

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Cashier: No, I know it was you because I chased you out of the store. Now get out before I call the cops.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Junkie: Well… I did it dozens of times before and no one said anything…

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Cashier: That’s cause we didn’t catch you jackass! That doesn’t make it any less wrong!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Junkie: (genuinely indignant) Fuck you man! Is this how you treat your customers? I’m telling all my friends. You just lost my business! (storms out)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Yeah buddy, we lost your valuable business of you stealing from us. I think somehow we’ll survive.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: RealMenJulienne

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Hilarious! This is your brain on drugs...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: Spice_zing

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    …or boone's farm.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    they still make that stuff?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  2. re: RealMenJulienne

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    I am drawing the conclusion that Boone's Farm Strawberry is NOT good for you ...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Seriously hilarious story.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: foiegras

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      it has a place in my heart from my underage drinking years! (not a great place, but it's there)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: foiegras

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        What gets me is that it costs $4 and it's like 4% alcohol. If you're gonna brazenly steal liquor why not go for something better or stronger?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: RealMenJulienne

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          'cause it tastes good, duh...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    2. When I was a kid, our neighbors only had one car, so my mom would regularly take the neighbor lady grocery shopping with us…

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      It was a labor of love for my mother who was more mortified at every turn, from the fact that the neighbor lady would go to the store with rollers in her hair (with a scarf over top) to her opening packages and letting her kid eat them in the aisles while shopping.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Someone at the store had the AUDACITY to say something to her once and my mom quietly led me away as she argued with the manager… I had no idea how hilarious the whole scene was at the time, but I look back on it now and crack up!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Present day:
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      At the nearby Assi supermarket, you can get a fair amount of Latino/Hispanic foods.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      One time, I had my cart full of fixins to make tamale and the guy bagging the groceries leaned over to me and said “so what time tomorrow is dinner?”
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      The lady at the register shot both of us a dirty look, I told him tamale should be ready by 3:30 tomorrow, don’t be late! A couple guys who were nearby heart and started cracking up… then they were saying stuff to eachother in Spanish… which I don’t understand… so I just gave the “smile and nod” move waved and left

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. Me, years ago, college freshman. In line at Safeway, awestruck to find myself behind a highly respected professor. I'm sure the funny scene was on my face: He purchased 2 things: prunes and TP.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        11 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: joanneh

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Oh, you've reminded me of one ... some years ago I worked for someone who lived in the same bedroom community as me, about 30 miles or so away from where we worked. This guy was suspicious of everything. If I said that I was running late due to my alarm not going off due to lost power, he said, MY power was just fine last night. When I said I shopped at the same grocery store as he did, he said, I'VE never seen you there.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Some years after I left the company, guess who I finally saw at 'our' grocery store ... with a sheepish look on his face ...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: foiegras

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            While once working at an A&P I once saw a clown walk in the store.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: syrup09

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Ok, two quick scenes from my supermarket days....

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              1- Guy walks up to my register wearing nothing but shoes with no socks and running shorts with no pockets and no wallet. Where does he pull the money from. Hint: it wasn't in his shoes.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              2- Working at customer service desk on a Monday evening. Guy walks up to make a return- condoms that he bought on Friday. Not a pack, not a couple of packs, but an entire box of 100. Guess his weekend didn't turn out as he had planned.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. eeeuuwwww

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                2. priceless!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Makes you think where that dollar in your pocket was before it came to you, doesn't it? :D

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    i was thinking that, yes. poor cashier, too! eeeeuuuuuwwww.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    i really appreciate the stores that have the sanitizing wipes dispenser out so you can wipe the cart handle: trader joe's, harris teeter, safeway…i don't think giant has that, though...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      The Giant in my neighborhood has the wipes. Could be that there is an assisted living campus right next door.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        I don't think so. Our local Giants all have the wipes dispensers. After reading you post, I may use them on the way out of the store now.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: gaffk

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          well, i 'll have to check my giant again. i would think they'd have to do it, like their competitors. THANKFULLY.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          not only should you wipe your hands, the cart handle, but also the cart seat (where i put my purse).

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            I'm the product of a big city . . . my purse never leaves my shoulder.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: gaffk

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Product of a little city and a mom who taught me properly--same here. :)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        2. This one is a bit more obscure... maybe only those of you from the Midwest will get the weirdness. In Indiana we have a local “celebrity” car dealer named Bob Rohrman who is famous for his annoying/incomprehensible/somewhat racist TV commercials. At a 24-hour grocery store I used to frequent, the famous Bob Rohrman used to come in at 2 AM when the store was empty and just load up on carts and carts of discounted nearly-expired canned vegetables. So that's why his commercials are so terrible, he's blowing the advertising budget to support his canned vegetable habit!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          There’s only one, Bob RORRRRRRRRHMAN

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          5 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: RealMenJulienne

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Maybe he was gettting all canned veggies for a food bank or soup kitchen. And maybe he would do this at 2 in the morning because he didn't want to publicize his philanthropy.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              i thought the same thing, vidute.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              by the way, i don't recall seeing canned veggies being pulled for expiration, but i'm sure it has to done if there is not enough turnover.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: alkapal

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                The supermarkets I go to pull products that are about to expire, are dinged or are being discontinued. Harris Teeter, especially, discontinues and replaces a lot of products.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              2. re: Vidute

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Do you have inside information on Mr Rohrman? I would love to know if this was the case.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: RealMenJulienne

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  I'm sorry, but I don't have any inside info on Mr. Rohrman. You might ask him the next time you see him, but I wouldn't expect him verify his generosity. That is not his public persona. Just think of the news stories that pop up every year when some person dies and it's discovered that they've lived frugally and were actually millionaires who are leaving their money to charity.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            2. This spring I was grocery shopping and passed a young woman, dressed like a total slob, with a cart packed full of junk food, yelling at someone on the other end of her cell phone. "I'm sorry BUT IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU HAD A HEART ATTACK."

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Listening to her, and looking into the cart, I wasn't so sure...