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If you were to compete in an eating contest, what would your "weapon of choice" be?

I know most of us consider speed eating, or "who can eat the most," contests to be gauche and beneath that of a Chowhound.

But let's say you were to compete in one those eating contests, what would you want your competitive raison d'etre to be?

Hot dogs?

Ice cream?

Pizza?

Something else? What?

I think my weapon of choice would be granola, as long as I could have as much water as I needed.

You?

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  1. I'd probably be a worthy competitor for ice cream (high quality, simple flavors like vanilla or chocolate -- ice cream without stuff in it...). Maybe McDonald's fries or chicken nuggets. Maybe s'mores -- I am a s'mores fiend when out camping and friends are appalled at how much sugar I can handle if they haven't seen me eat s'mores before.

    I don't think I could do the hot dog or pizza thing. Probably not ramen either, although I do enjoy me a deliciously salty bag of ramen on occasion, with tabasco and an egg stirred in. I rarely eat any of those items quickly or to excess.

    3 Replies
    1. re: calmossimo

      I can eat a ton of cold pizza and meatballs and pasta dishes. Just not hot.

      1. re: calmossimo

        Salty bag of ramen? So it sounds like you've never tried the real stuff that doesn't come out of a bag. I think if you did, you might change your mind about adding ramen to the list of things you would want to stuff yourself with.

        1. re: Bkeats

          Nah... I've had ramen shop ramen before, and although it's delicious, I don't think I could handle enough of it as part of an eating contest.

      2. guilt? a powerful emetic?

        1. Iranian Caspian Sea beluga caviar. I may not win, but I would have a lot of fun in losing.

          5 Replies
          1. re: Veggo

            Outstanding Veggo...my fave too and I still have the tin...
            916 club

            Watermelon
            King Crab legs
            Ahi rare
            Banana cream pie
            Filet O' Fish with extra tartar sauce with fries scrunched inside..
            ;- )

            1. re: Beach Chick

              Filet O' Fish with extra tartar sauce with fries scrunched inside..
              _______________

              Now we're talking!

              1. re: ipsedixit

                yeah, i'll second the FOF and fries!

              2. re: Beach Chick

                Do I have to shell the crab cuz king crab can be a nasty wound if you're not careful. And shelling in a race, well, it smells of danger. If it is shelled and i have a smidge of butter its perfect for a throw down and I'll challenge you Beach Chick. I may lose, but so happy trying.

              3. re: Veggo

                veggo….he shoots; he scores.

              4. I'm pretty solid with pizza; I'd like to think I'd acquit myself well with such a foodstuff. That said, as long as there isn't a serious time burden ('cause I'm a slow picker), give me buckets of blue crabs and pitchers of beer. Preferably both, but I am more than willing to go toe-to-toe with anyone over either of them individually.

                1. I would eat something that I totally dislike. See, I was a professional competitive eater for two years and retired in 2007. I ate in several contests across the country and I can say that I've never once enjoyed the food that I've eaten at a contest. It was almost always the worst form of the food that I'd ever eaten. Grilled cheese sandwiches, chicken wings, tamales, hotdogs, pizza rolls, sliders - you name it, it was horrible. Everything is cold and has been sitting around since the morning or even the day before when it was prepared. Pizza? It's not only cold and low quality, but the cheese is waxy and it's been sitting since the morning so the crust is stale, hard, and dry. Tamales? Cold and sawdust-like. Chicken wings? Overcooked, tough, stringy, and straight from the fridge. I could go on, but you get the message.
                  If I were to ever eat again professionally, I'd choose something absolutely repulsing so it wouldn't seem as bad (I wouldn't have a point of reference for that food) and it wouldn't ruin the foods that I already know and love.

                  1 Reply
                  1. re: fledflew

                    how about butter? since that's normally good cold or warm, it'd be a snap. Also, eating a pound of it takes "barf tolerance" more than a big belly...