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Dec 16, 2011 05:46 AM

Absurd Farm to Table Menus

These items are from a restaurant we were considering going to:

"Home grown salad cut to order"

"Humanely raised local animals"

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  1. Sure - but if that's the clientele they're looking for, they're using the correct verbage . . .

    1. What's absurd? Both make sense.

      13 Replies
      1. re: Peg

        "salad cut to order"...that doesn't strike you as absurb?

        1. re: Notaslavetofashion

          Presumably it means it's cut from the ground to order. I know of few items (can't think of any, actually) that grow from the ground that benefit from being out of the ground for any time at all.

          1. re: tommy

            Diner: "I'd like the garden salad"

            Waiter: "Wonderful. And how would you like that cut? Julienned, chopped, diced, or slivered?"

            Diner: "The romaine I would like chopped, 3x3, and the arugula torn by hand, and the butter lettuce simply rough diced."

            1. re: ipsedixit

              There is a highend steakhouse here that presents you with a selection of 6 steak knives to choose from. The waiter was giving a description of each one and its country of origin. I just thought, this is crazy, could I just have one that will cut the steak?

              1. re: DaisyM

                Yes, the waiter comes out with a tray of 6 knives to choose from.

                BTW, the steak is excellent there.

                1. re: DaisyM

                  Christ on a bicycle- do you get to choose how pointy your fork is, too?

                  1. re: EWSflash

                    You also get to try a bunch that you be considering buying. Value added.

                    1. re: tommy

                      I can't remember which restaurant presented you with a tray of fine pens so you could choose which one you wanted to sign the bill with.

                      1. re: DaisyM

                        It was Alain Ducasse's first US restaurant in the Essex House in NYC. They also had little upholstered poufs so a lady would not have to put her purse on the floor.

                1. re: tommy

                  No idea. Just a poor (probably very poor) attempt at humor.

                  1. re: ipsedixit

                    I think we'd all agree that this would be absurd! :)

                    1. re: tommy

                      No more absurd than asking to see "The Papers" of the chicken one is contemplating consuming. ;-)

        2. Struggling to find the absurdity. Local/sustainable/homegrown are things many people are loking for these days.

          1. Put me in the stumped category also. What do you find absurd?

            1. I guess the cut to order thing is a little silly (I am both a cut salad producer and work the salad line in a restaurant -- to my mind cutting each salad as you go makes no sense) but some people will pay for it I guess. I do have a general complaint about business using the terms "home grown" or "home made." "Our house-grown salad" makes more sense to me. This is all just me being picky however -- I don't actually find the above menu "absurd."

              The animal thing seems spot on to me.