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How about Waveny House in Waveny Park in New Canaan? It's an events space so you'd have to hire separate caterers or provide your own food/bev. My only experiences there was as a kid for a couple of birthday parties but I remember them being really whimsical. Since your group is large it could be an interesting option.
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All the others are worthy suggestions, and here is one that is a little outside the box: Nino's in Vista (about a 1 mile beyond NC on 123). The rustic room can accommodate large groups, and they could separate your group with a curtain. They may be able to arrange a family style Italian dinner at a reasonable price (avoid the "specials", which can be pricy). I have been there with large groups (6-10), but never 40-50.
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Barcelona in South Norwalk could be worth looking into, not just for the solid food (Spanish/tapas) but they have a large room that I have seen rented out for private functions, which is somewhat of a rarity in the area (to my knowledge at least).
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