Psst... We're working on the next generation of Chowhound! View >
HOME > Chowhound > Home Cooking >
Sep 5, 2011 02:28 PM

Dieting recipe help - I need to loose weight without starving him

So I need to lose weight.... My waist is slowly out growing my pants. My problem is that my SO is almost too skinny. Most diets/shows/healthy eating programs assume that the whole household could benefit from low calorie/fat recipes... not mine.
When I was single, I could loose weight no problem... I would make vats of low calorie spicy flavorful soups that would easily fill me up. I would keep my place empty of all other foods to resist temptation. However, now I am cooking for both of us (he doesn't cook), and if I make a soup like I used to then he eats it and feels weak or tired from the lack of calories. He has a super metabolism and needs lots of calories.
I could send him out for his own food, but then he winds up eating things I love in front of me like tacos or ramen, etc.., and it makes dieting really painful (and it also means we're spending more on food). I struggle with will power and temptation.

The only thing I've found that sort of works is if I make a soup like a gumbo or cioppino where he adds a lot of rice and bread (the normal accompaniments) and I can just eat the soup. Then I have only cooked one meal, I am not tempted by other food, and he is full from all the extra carbs. However, I need more ideas recipes for things like these where we can eat the same things, but he can add extra carbs. This is where I need your help! I can't think of very many, and we want variety.

Also, if anyone has any other approaches to my dilemma or has faced a similar dilemma, I'd love to hear about it!


  1. Click to Upload a photo (10 MB limit)
  1. Try this web site
    Great lightened up recipes, and they are so good that your SO will eat an extra portion!

    3 Replies
    1. re: roxlet

      Unfortunately that doesn't work. He never eats a lot in one sitting and stops eating when his is full. Quantity wise I can eat more in one sitting than him. Thanks.

      1. re: lrealml

        Well, the recipes there are fantastic, so take a look and there may be a way to "fatten up" his portion.

        1. re: roxlet

          +1 on Skinnytaste. Her recipes are fabulous! And good for the entire family. One thing that I also do is add salads wherever possible to my meals.....makes portion control of the other stuff not so difficult.

    2. Why not focus on protein? That will keep you satiated for longer and he can add in carbs as he pleases. Remember you don't need to starve yourself to go on a diet (like extreme low cal diets, because the quickly you lose the weight, the easier it is to put back on). If you are interested, go to and learn about the science behind fat loss. It's all about tracking what you eat (however boring that may be) but it's the best (and i guess, healthiest) way to do it. Fat loss isn't healthy, but it should only for a short period of time. I guess more than anything else, also look at your eating habits. Good luck!

      1. I make 1 protein, 1 starch, 1 vegetable and everyone eats as much of what they want. For you, fill the plate, 1/2 with vegetables, 1/4 w/ protein, 1/4 with starch. Eat as many vegetables as possible. fill up on protein more sparingly and not much on starch. He can eat what he wants.

        5 Replies
        1. re: chowser

          Good Idea... I normally make one pot meals like pastas and stews with all the veggies, starches, and proteins in one dish. Dividing it up would be more work, but perhaps I could control my portions and proportions better.


          1. re: lrealml

            When I make a one pot meal, I always have a big side of roast vegetables/salad/etc. so I have something to eat, if I want more. Good luck with it! I was in the same position w/ my husband, but the years have caught up to him.

            1. re: lrealml

              that's what i was going to say. you will just have to really exercise control. when i'm being "good" and losing weight, my BF and i cook/eat the same thing, but my portion sizes are just much smaller. buttery mashed potatoes? 3 tbls for me, a heaping mound for him. bacon on that BLT? 3 or 4 stips for him, 2 for me. you will be surprised at how soon the reduced amount of anything is actually enough for you.

              1. re: mariacarmen

                "you will be surprised at how soon the reduced amount of anything is actually enough for you."

                Exactly--and it's why I make sure what I eat is delicious if it's non-nutritional. There's no point in eating cake that's not delicious. And if it is, you can savor it and eat less and be satisfied.

          2. This isn't a proper chowhound response, but would he eat anything like protein bars or granola bars to keep him going between meals? That would at least keep him from feeling weak/tired without tempting you with too much extra food. I have a friend with a super metabolism like that, and he carries around hard pretzels and chocolate that he snacks on all day.

            1 Reply
            1. re: LabLady

              He already does eat granola/ granola bars as snacks throughout the day (only gourmet ones though :) of course)... I just asked him and he is willing to increase his snacking during the day... this will definitely help some! Thanks!

            2. Make a protein based "pasta" sauce or fish dish, and serve yours over spaghetti squash and his over real pasta.

              Not totally dinner-y, but for once in a while... egg white omelettes with roasted veg and turkey bacon for you. His with real eggs, milk/cream cheese, cheese, etc. and real bacon and toast.

              Make fish - yours spice crusted, his nut crusted, etc.

              Enchiladas with lo carb tortillas for you, homemade enchilada sauce, and fill yours with chicken and veggies, his with chicken cheese whatever.

              Salmon croquettes and a cream soup - leave out cream for yours or use almond milk. serve his finished with cream and crusty bread.

              Stuffed baked potatoes or yams.... top his with more stuff - butter sour cream, etc yours with veggies. Serve with Roast chicken.

              Stacked Eggplant Parmesan - leave the cheese off of yours and supplement with herbs and caramelized onions

              ...don't know if any of those help... i have more if they do...