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Infamous Kwaanza Cake Creator Revealed

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  1. omg i'm going to pee myself laughing now.

    3 Replies
    1. re: soupkitten

      ROFLMAO!!!! OMG, I think this says it ALL!

      "And I know the Corn Nuts were disgusting, but she didn't. As a matter of fact, the more tasteless the recipes got the more she liked them, the faster she approved them, and I could get home and drink some medium-priced wine after our meetings. She's not a good role model for abstinence. "

      1. re: LindaWhit

        lmao, Great read. I bet she has a bunch of interesting stories about some of the celebrity cook book recipes she's done. Although it looks like she isn't really willing to divulge much past this.

        1. re: LindaWhit

          I passed that link onto the Spouse last night and I could tell when he reached that line. I'm surprised that the didn't hurt himself, he was laughing so hard.
          Crimes against food, indeed.

      2. That was great!

        One of the best lines from Sandra-Lee about the food she wanted to do. "No fresh food. Just canned food. Nothing fresh, do you understand me? All food out of cans or boxes..." I think that about sums it all up.

        Thanks for posting that.

        1. i'm on the floor! I'll have to watch the videos this evening. :)

          1. Not sure which is worse - the Hanukah cake or the Kwanzaa cake.

            And that link to the tablescape? Yeah, an old, musty antique chair, spraypainted gold, then with "ratty old fringe" (a direct quote, no less) salvaged from god knows what rat-infested sewer, and draped with craft store grape vines and silk flowers.

            All there to drip dust and whatever cooties are in the chair and fringe all over my guests' food.


              1. Is this real or is it just a joke? I sort of got a feeling that it was just satire.

                20 Replies
                1. re: yfunk3

                  You mean Sandra Lee isn't satirical? And here I've been missing the point all these years.

                  1. re: yfunk3

                    yfunk3, it is, sadly, quite for real.

                    1. re: sunshine842

                      I dunno. Still not 100% convinced that it's not just a comedic piece dreamed up or exaggerated immensely by the author. I mean, not that I don't believe it could've happened, but the writing style and the technique/language employed...it just doesn't ring true to me.

                      I'm no fan of SL, but I also don't think she's as evil as everyone makes her out to be (gastronomically, that is...personality-and-lifestyle-wise...I'll keep my mouth shut!). It's a good concept IN THEORY for today's society (and I think she's trying to move towards that now with mixing fresh and processed), but she definitely was deluded in a lot of her execution (I always said she should just use a recipe where it's just cool whip and soup mix and get it over with, since that's in every one of her recipes!). Don't get me started on the damn tablescapes...

                      1. re: yfunk3

                        It's a clip from a December episode of her program "Semi Home-made", which airs on Food Network...it really, really was recorded and aired as a serious guide to holiday food prep.

                        It's right there on the FN site: http://www.foodnetwork.com/videos/kwa...

                        and a few clicks will take you to "her" page http://www.foodnetwork.com/sandra-lee...

                        the only thing I find oddly fascinating is that her cocktail recipes look pretty good...and very, VERY potent...which could be an important clue.

                        1. re: sunshine842

                          Oh, I know the actual Kwanzaa cake exists, but I was just questioning the HuffPo article, that's all.

                          Trust me, you're preaching to the choir when you talk of SL's crazy food. Though she might have a thing with the strong cocktails, since things taste better when you're drunk (or high), right? :o)

                        2. re: yfunk3

                          I'm with you, yfunk3. I'm not convinced the "confession" is real. It might just be a satirical jab at Sandra Lee and her dreadful Kwaanza Cake. Presumably "ghost writers" are contractually bound not to claim authorship of the books they've been paid to pen on behalf of others?

                          And, wow, I'd not heard of the Star of David cake until now. That's awful, too.


                          1. re: The Dairy Queen

                            Sorry, I was thinking you were saying the SL video was the gag...my bad.

                            yeah, not sure about the food writer thing...that's SL's whole stock in trade...and somehow I'm not sure that even SL was incapable of coming up with that bad a train wreck.

                            Speaking of train wreck...Cakewrecks linked to the Hanukah cake disaster during Hanukah. Sandra? Just go to the bakery and buy a ready made cake...it doesn't scream "I'm useless in the kitchen and too effing cheap to do anything else" quite as loudly as that pearl-encrusted wreck.

                            1. re: The Dairy Queen

                              I'm not convinced the piece is real either, backup from a friend or not. Seems like the author would be shooting herself in the foot not only with SL but with other cookbook authors she works with. What's to stop her from disparaging others if she did it to SL?

                              And if it is a real piece and I was one of her other clients, I'd be worried what she might want to write about me in the future. Funny piece...but not very professional in my opinion.

                              1. re: ttoommyy

                                I agree, actually. It's possible that she got SL's permission to write the piece (though, I wonder if, even she gave permission for Denise to write the piece, SL is okay with the comment --paraphrasing-"-the more awful the recipes were, the faster SL would approve them") and might even be able to prove that to prospective clients, but, still, she might be turning off a lot of potential "ghost writing" prospects who don't like the idea of being outed.


                            2. re: yfunk3

                              Denise Vivaldo is a friend of mine... it's not satire. Really, truly happened.

                                1. re: The Dairy Queen

                                  June, I'm a journalist, tell Denise I admire her courage to come clean, and that this was one of the funniest pieces of the year!

                                  1. re: TrishUntrapped

                                    Actually, I'm amazed that this didn't violate the terms of her "ghost-writing" contract with S.L., unless she got S.L.'s permission to write the story. Maybe S.L. was happy to pass the blame back to Denise.


                                    1. re: The Dairy Queen

                                      That's exactly why I thought it might be fake. I'm still not 100% convinced, but Ms. Vivaldo might find herself on the other end of some sort of legal unpleasantry from SL if SL didn't authorize the HuffPo piece... especially now that SL is the significant other of the governor-elect of NY state.

                                      1. re: The Dairy Queen

                                        S.L. probably just bought some pre-made contracts, mixed them together and had Denise sign them. They're probably missing a lot of clauses that would be in there if she had created the contract from scratch.

                                          1. re: LindaWhit

                                            HAHAH! That went completely over my head until Linda laughed at it.


                                  2. re: ChefJune

                                    Hey, whatever pays the bills. I'm sure we've all done stuff for work that we didn't want to put on our resume, for fear someone would realize that it was US who did THAT. (yeah, making flyers for a trade show to tape up over the urinals that said "while you're not thinking about anything else for a minute..." Oh holy hell.)

                                    But my estimation of Sandra Lee now drops even lower than before(didn't think that was possible), that she couldn't even dream THAT up by herself.

                                    1. re: ChefJune

                                      ChefJune, please tell your friend I am amazed by her bravery, and thank her for the laugh.

                                      1. re: ChefJune

                                        That was so funny--you should tell her to write her own book and not ghost write. I'd buy her cookbook if it had that type of commentary.

                                2. A Saturday Night Live skit ... yes?

                                  1 Reply
                                  1. re: chicgail

                                    I'm surprised it hasn't yet been done by the SNL crowd! Talk about a field day!

                                  2. ladies and gentlemen, the new first lady of my state.

                                    1 Reply
                                    1. re: julietg

                                      Correction - new first Mistress of my stateaddres. I can't wait until she makes appetizers out of that boxed stuffing mix!

                                    2. I think I just soiled myself. Oh lord help me.

                                      1 Reply
                                      1. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/denise-...

                                        Did they move the original article and leave the related links? Sure did! Ms. Vivaldo tweets she was "D" listed..http://dlisted.com/node/40059

                                        1. The video, the article and this thread made my day. Thanks all!


                                          2 Replies
                                          1. re: wontonfm

                                            Oh. my. God. At first I didn't know what you all were talking about, especially since I couldn't click on the original link.
                                            Then I saw it. On You Tube.
                                            I'm actually speechless.

                                            1. re: aurora50

                                              if you click on the link to D-listed above you can basically read the article. a-mazing.