Psst... We're working on the next generation of Chowhound! View >
HOME > Chowhound > Not About Food >
Jul 18, 2010 03:36 PM

Could your/ IS your significant other a picky eater?

Can a food lover and picky eater really get along? I so enjoy eating out or entertaining and cooking and I often have trouble sharing that with picky eaters.

So if you're single, do you have a problem with your date's finickiness?

If you're married--did you care or have you survived with a picky eater?

Weigh in

  1. Click to Upload a photo (10 MB limit)
  1. <Can a food lover and picky eater really get along? I so enjoy eating out or entertaining and cooking and I often have trouble sharing that with picky eaters.>

    Yes. My spousal equivalent has a long list of foods that he can't (not won't, can't) eat. As relationship obstacles go, this one is pretty minor. I cook my food; he cooks his food. When we choose a restaurant, I make sure there's something on the menu for him. It's not that big a deal, unless you make it that big a deal.

    He understands that food is very important to me, and he's always interested in my cooking fetishes (razor clams! mung bean jelly noodles! hummus!). He just doesn't eat the results of my various experiments - which is sometimes just as well. And he will tell anyone who asks (and even those who don't) that I make the best macaroni and cheese on earth. Which may be true.

    1 Reply
    1. re: small h

      I think the key, which you just mentioned, is that you both cook for yourselves. Bravi to both of you. I think my main problem with the married-to-a-non-hound threads is that the nonhounds don't seem to want to cook for themselves, which to me is absurd. I understand that my attitude is at least partly my issue, so don't bother pointing that out. My DH came from a classic midcentury midwestern family (his mom graduated from college with a Home Economics degree, even) but he has always had an adventurous palate and a wide range of likes, thank God.

    2. Everyone has a few foods they don't like; that isn't a problem. However, if someone has so many dislikes that they become a picky eater in my estimation, that is a definite deal breaker for me. An example of something I have zero patience or tolerance for... I once knew a guy who proclaimed he disliked - and he refused to touch - all fruits. ALL FRUITS. No exceptions. Pa-leeze.

      5 Replies
      1. re: woodleyparkhound

        Yes, that is certainly ridiculous. My brother-in-law is like that: the only vegetable he considers edible is a potato, if you can even call that a vegetable. He also requires plain steak or chicken and a roll for a majority of his meals. When someone is *that* picky, I view them as spoiled and expect to get their way. And that is what I'm not cool with.

        1. re: bblonde

          I hear you loud and clear, woodley and bblonde, too often it's a control issue rather than a preference, because after all, people like that would have Darwined their line out of existence long ago, or maybe they should have.

          1. re: bblonde

            Maybe I have just been lucky. Most women I have dated would eat anything that no longer moves, and some things that still do.

            1. re: bblonde

              That sounds just like my neighbor. He refuses to eat fruits or vegetables. It's just basic meat + starch. He has two toddlers who want to eat what he eats, and his wife is terrified they'll pick up his awful habits. I don't eat everything, so it's not a big deal to me if others don't eat everything. However a diet that restrictive just seems hard to tolerate. You can't go to any fun restaurants are try interesting new recipes.

              1. re: queencru

                If the wife is so terrified she should make it her business to introduce the toddlers to all kinds of foods.

                My husband is a relatively picky eater. I should say he was a picky eater. When I met him, he ate spaghetti and Kraft parmesan cheese from a can every night. After 10 years together (and 2 kids), he eats about a thousand more things than he did when we first met. However, there are still many things he won't eat. He barely eats any fruits and vegetables. Would I like him to eat more (any) fruits and vegetables? Of course. Do I make an issue out of it? No. He is who he is. Is it annoying at times? Yes. But he is a great father and husband, is very successful in his career and never makes a big deal about his food issues when we go places. He does not act spolied, or entitled nor does he expect to get his way as was mentioned above. And oddly enough, he is generally willing to try most new recipes that I serve to him, as long as they do not involve too many vegetables!

                But, I never, ever let my husband's food issues get in the way of what I feed my kids. They eat fruits, vegetables and a wide variety of foods in general. And my husband never imposes his issues on the kids.

          2. My husband is something of a picky eater. He prefers French, Italian and American. He also doesn't frequent casual dinners when we go out.

            Lunch is my saving grace....I go for Indian, Mexican, Thai, etc. Also on the weekends we tend to do our own thing for breakfast and lunch.

            1. Picky eater? Great! More for me.

              1. Mrs CHM is pretty picky.
                Steaks must be extra well done. If there's a hint of pink, it ain't cooked yet.
                Chicken (boneless skinless breasts only) and pork (loin chops only, remove the bone first) must be super extra well done. The closer to sawdust the better. There's always ketchup.

                No seafood.
                No lamb
                No "parts" (offal or anything that isn't a chicken breast, pork loin chop, or a recognized extra well done steak)

                She will eat most veggies.

                We've been married 25 years, she's a great mom and wife.

                If I want my "weird food" I'll go out by myself or cook my own dinner while burning up a steak for her.

                1 Reply
                1. re: chileheadmike

                  This makes me so sad. Ketchup is likely to go bad at our house we use it so infrequently. When I met my SO, he was eating his meats med well. Now he is going for med rare. I'm not trying to change him.

                  I hope you get as much "weird food" as you want!