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Shameful Food Secrets

We all have one, and you know it's the truth, even if you're a die-hard arugula-eating food freak like me. My shameful food secret is: I LOVE macaroni and cheese made with Velveeta. I would choose it over a decadent four-cheese pasta any day, and I can eat the whole pan myself.
So; what's YOUR dirty/shameful food secret? What do you eat when nobody's looking?

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  1. I love that corn bake that's made with canned creamed corn, jiffy corn bread mix, sour cream, butter. Whenever I've made it people scrape the dish for the very last bits. And I don't want to tell them what's in it.

    7 Replies
    1. re: karykat

      Oh, I LOVE this one - adding a can of diced mild green chiles is a great variation. And I have a keyphrase for when I don't want to admit what I've put in food - "Oh, this? I just threw it together with some stuff I had around", but that only works if you've made something with pudding mix or onion soup mix, not if you've "thrown together" a napoleon or poached baby shrimp or something,,,, : )

      1. re: mamachef

        I'm going to remember that line! Think it will come in handy.

      2. re: karykat

        That's corn pudding. I made it for the first time last Thanksgiving, and knew I was in trouble after the first bite. Even worse, I used Paula Deen's recipe. It was like fried corn-flavored butter, and I *loved* it.

        1. re: onceadaylily

          Had it for Thanksgiving this year and everyone loved it (including me)

          1. re: nvcook

            This year I added a healthy shake of cayenne to the batter, and the boyfriend loved it. I think next year I might try finely minced peppers of some kind, or a bit of adobo.

        2. re: karykat

          I also love potato chips in tuna sandwiches (preferably made with toast) and always Lays chips... and I can't get it here in Boston, but I would go way out of my way for one of the pork roll sandwiches I grew up eating in NJ. Usually on squishy white rolls with a little melted cheese.

          1. re: karykat

            ditto on the corn pudding thing with jiffy corn bread mix!

          2. Totino's pizza rolls and bologna (carmelized in a skillet) with white bread and a smear of mayo.

            5 Replies
            1. re: groover808

              I had a fried bologna sandwich once with carmelized red onions and pepper jack cheese, and I will say right now, in front of God and everyone, that it was
              g-o-o-d.

              1. re: groover808

                those Totino's pizza rolls are like food crack. I don't buy them regularly but I always make an excuse when we have poker games. :)

                1. re: Sandwich_Sister

                  Yes, they're my guilty pleasure. I nuke em in the microwave to get them hot and then toast them in the toaster oven so they get crispy. And yes, like crack, so hard to give up....so I've heard.

                  1. re: groover808

                    I make my Mum buy them every time I come to visit as I can't get them in Canada!!!

                  2. re: Sandwich_Sister

                    I have been in love with pizza rolls since I was a kid. I try to avoid buying them because I can't handle the portion control...may have been known to sneak a few off the plate before sharing with my husband.

                2. Mamachef, We keep Velveeta Shells and Cheese in the pantry all the time. It is quick and easy and delicious.

                  I put potato chips inside my sandwiches. That is my shame.

                  9 Replies
                  1. re: Sensuous

                    Wow, now that people are responding I'm realizing that I have many, many food shame secrets that I hadn't even realized, because I love putting potato chips, pref. ruffled, on a great tunafish salad sandwich.

                    1. re: mamachef

                      I've been putting potato chips on my tuna fish sandwiches for over 50 years. To me, it's a perfect pairing.

                      1. re: grampart

                        Potato chips on tuna salad sandwich, me too. And hold the jelly, I like peanut butter and potato chip sandwiches.

                        1. re: Island

                          yep. pb, strawberry jam, and rippled chips LOVE!

                          1. re: C70

                            I do potato chips in peanut butter and (grape) jelly sandwiches. Pringles are my first choice. Cheetos are my second.

                            1. re: Firegoat

                              Cheetos, how exotic! :>) I'll have to give that a try. No jam though. That's for when I'm desperate for something sweet and the only thing around is vanilla ice cream. It's white trash ice cream topping.

                              1. re: Island

                                I prefer the "crunchy" cheetos as opposed to the fluffy ones. They hold up their crunchiness longer amidst the jelly.

                      2. re: mamachef

                        Tim's Wasabi potato chips are awesome on a tuna sandwich.

                      3. re: Sensuous

                        Shhhhh.... me too and I was so thrilled when the grocery outlet had a huge box with several portions inside. yea! But don't have any bloodwork done if you ate earlier in the week.

                      4. Once a year I make the Italian Love Cake from all recipes, even though the boyfriend doesn't like it, and I've made no plans to take the cake to a function. Once a year, I make a sheet cake (with ricotta and egg filling, covered with a pudding and whipped cream topping) and I eat it all over the course of the next week. Sometimes for breakfast.

                        It usually happen in July, when I start craving cold desserts. (After I typed that, I glanced down at my thighs, contemplatively).

                            1. re: toomuchfat

                              And getting a bit on the gushy true confessions side. IMNSHO.

                              1. re: Island

                                Then you have nothing to be shameful of.

                                1. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                  Ha! Not according to the milk lovers I know.

                              2. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                When I saw your thread about this I thought you were confessing to an addiction to Milka chocolates. Then I started wondering where I could get my hands on some. Fast.

                                1. re: buttertart

                                  :)

                                  Nah, I meant milk -- from the eTrade TV ads. I did have some Milka Hot Chocolate drinks, but I am not sure if they are any good as the chocolate bars.

                                  http://www.tassimodirect.com/Tassimo/...

                                  1. re: buttertart

                                    I was eyeing the Milka chocolates at World Market only yesterday....

                                    1. re: janeh

                                      If you like milk choc they're pretty darn good. They come in a bazillion types, some seasonal, in Germany. A collleague used to have a big box of German Christmas treats sent over every year. Mmm...

                                2. I use Velveeta too and Kraft American cheese. I also use condensed cream of mushroom soup in my broccoli casserole along with Velveeta. I use Cool Whip, Jello, Minute Rice, and A-1 steak sauce- all things that have been the source of great condemnation threads on this MB. As I have said before, I am a white trash cook. However, I have feed many, many people including a threshing crew for a week and no one has ever turned up their nose at what I cooked so there must be something to being a white trash cook. LOL

                                  3 Replies
                                  1. re: vafarmwife

                                    Hold your head high and keep cookin. Myself, I'd have a hard time on a steady diet of brie and filet; gotta mix it up a little bit, so nachos one night and grilled swordfish the next...nothing trashy about being proud of what you put on the table!!

                                    1. re: vafarmwife

                                      I try to stick to brown rice, but Minute Rice is FANTASTIC. I sometimes use it when I make a beautiful, ginger-y stir-fry and want to save myself some time. And lol, I just wrote about Cool Whip and Jello!

                                      1. re: vafarmwife

                                        Cream of whatever soup and its many uses is one of the things I'll always be grateful to my MIL for teaching me. Honestly I thought people ate it as a creamed soup. Love that stuff.

                                      2. When I make a pulled pork BBQ sandwich or an open faced hot roast beef sandwich, I prefer them on squishy processed white bread. There.

                                        5 Replies
                                          1. re: runwestierun

                                            I totally, totally get this, 'cause it's all about pillowy softness and gravy-soaking and mmmmmmm. Wheat totally wouldn't be the same, what with all the healthy bidness in there; too much fibrous obstruction to the aforementioned gravy-soaking possible.

                                            1. re: runwestierun

                                              same as for an open-faced turkey sandwich. that white bread gets soggy in just the right way.

                                              1. re: Emme

                                                didn't know there was any other choice.

                                            2. Mmm, Velveeta mac. YUM!

                                              I like to mix two Jell-O pudding cups with a tooooooon of Cool Whip and swirl it around until it's nice and fluffy like a mousse, then add in broken Nilla Wafers. OMG so good, like chocolate cream pie without any effort.

                                              ETA: I came back here 10 minutes after I wrote this, reread it, and felt my eyes widen. I SOUND LIKE SANDRA 'SEMI-INSANE' LEE with this crap! BRB, crying.

                                              1. i love duncan hines brownies.

                                                1. I'm too secure to be "shamed" about anything. And I proudly admit that I eat tomato paste right out of the little can.

                                                  9 Replies
                                                  1. re: beevod

                                                    I had a childhood friend who squirted ketchup directly into her mouth without any shame at all.

                                                    1. re: Sensuous

                                                      supermarket mayo, spooned right out of the jar into the mouth.

                                                        1. re: barryg

                                                          +1 to that. We can officially close this thread now.

                                                    2. re: beevod

                                                      I do tomato paste shooters from the can, too- such a wonderful concentrated flavor!

                                                      1. re: EWSflash

                                                        count me as a tomato paste eater...

                                                      2. re: beevod

                                                        Ha, I'm not really tempted by tomato paste or ketchup, but I have a terrible habit of shaking a little hot sauce into my palm and licking it off whenever I go to add it to a dish. Then I feel like I have to wash my hands if cooking for anyone besides self and husband.

                                                        1. re: ErnieD

                                                          I dot the hot sauce on the tip of my finger. Mustard is also subject to such quality control.

                                                          The palm of my hand is reserved for my better salts, especially the pink Himalayan.

                                                      3. I buy Spaghettios with sliced franks for the kids. i don't have any kids.

                                                        9 Replies
                                                        1. re: LA Buckeye Fan

                                                          I don't have any kids either. And I dig the Spaghettios with the little meatballs, thank you very much.
                                                          Also, Mary Kitchen Corned Beef Hash with poached eggs.

                                                          1. re: aurora50

                                                            That hash with poached eggs is a go-to meal for my husband and I - I've tried making it at home with leftover brisket etc. and it doesn't even come close!!

                                                          2. re: LA Buckeye Fan

                                                            That's hysterical! I used to think Spaghettios was a soup when I was little...it sure as hell tastes nothing like spaghetti and is much closer to tomato soup with copious amounts of Os. :) I haven't had 'em in years, though.

                                                            I'm pretty shameless also--I have a deep and abiding love for what I call white trash potatoes. You know, those sliced potatoes in a can? Mmmm, so good fried up in butter with some smoked paprika. It's a straight trip back to childhood. NOM! Proud to tell ya I just had some in the last week!

                                                            And even though I can make my own hash without issue, I dig Mary Kitchen, too. I guess, if you think about it, 'cause it's actually just a variation on white trash potatoes. HA!

                                                            1. re: kattyeyes

                                                              AKA dog food hash chez nous...it does have a bit of the rendering plant whiff. Love it though.

                                                              1. re: buttertart

                                                                Straight out of the can, it does have a bit of that ALPO vibe goin' on, but not once you fry it up in the pan, no sirree! ;) And pass the Tabasco, too, make mine the chipotle variety...with cheesy eggs, too, if you please. Thank you kindly.

                                                                1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                  Fry it until it reduces to a shadow of itself, ALMOST all crispness. Yum +++.

                                                                  1. re: buttertart

                                                                    +1 for super crispy (fried in bacon fat if I've got any) - served with rye toast and a runny yolk, YUMMMM!

                                                                    1. re: just_M

                                                                      You guys are cracking me up! Yes, it has to be very crispy. : )
                                                                      AND with Tabasco.

                                                                  2. re: kattyeyes

                                                                    Speaking of the Alpo vibe, how about those tiny little dogfood tacos? Not the rolled taquitos, the little frozen halfmoons that you can either fry or oven bake (my preference) and eat them off the cookie sheet with a little salt

                                                            2. I like velveeta shells and cheese. I also, if I just want that PERFECT texture on my home made mac and cheese, I put a little velveeta in it. It just does SOMETHING for the texture that I can't otherwise reproduce.

                                                              I love room temperature, leftover stovetop stuffing (especially the sourdough one which I haven't actually seen in a few years now.... it was the best one!). It's also good if you take it (it has to be day old, otherwise it won't quite hold together) and make really firm patties, fry till the outside is crispy, then sprinkle just a pinch of seasoning salt on them. Gotta love fried bread lol!

                                                              3 Replies
                                                              1. re: Popkin

                                                                I love Stovetop Stuffing!!!! I'm gonna have to try it your way!

                                                                1. re: Popkin

                                                                  That is too funny. I am a liberal salter, but even still (it's been years), can only recall how salty Stovetop stuffing tasted to me...and then you add more seasoning salt. Good for you! ;) I do love stuffing patties, though. Yummy idea.

                                                                  1. re: Popkin

                                                                    if you ever make (i suppose or have) potato knishes, add a layer of stuffing inside with the potatoes :)

                                                                  2. When I'm home alone, I'm a soft touch for the Stouffers frozen mac and cheese which comes in 3 sizes. I nuke it for 4 minutes longer than the recommended time to deliberately overcook it and get those delicious corner crusties and improve that fat to moisture ratio. I pretty much shrink the middle size portion down to the size of the individual portion in the process. Mac and cheese with knife and fork? Oh, yeah.

                                                                    1 Reply
                                                                    1. I don't actually put Velveeta in anything. I eat it straight out of the wrapper.

                                                                      I also love canned green beans.

                                                                      6 Replies
                                                                      1. re: MandalayVA

                                                                        +1 on the beans... and asparagus and carrots... oh lord.

                                                                        1. re: Emme

                                                                          When I was a kid, I would eat an entire can of asparagus from my grandmothers pantry, it was so processed but so good, I need to try that again soon!

                                                                        2. re: MandalayVA

                                                                          I like the frenched green beans from a can. I admit it.

                                                                            1. re: Island

                                                                              Blond beans, as my great grandfather called them. Mmm...good.

                                                                            2. re: MandalayVA

                                                                              I love canned green beans, straight out of the can. Yum. Also delicious with some italian dressing.

                                                                            3. Pork Vienna Sausages right from the can with the jellied stuff still clinging. If it is a real upscale night, I might dip the little guys in French's yellow mustard.

                                                                              Fried salami on soft white bread with yellow mustard will also fit the bill.

                                                                              18 Replies
                                                                              1. re: Sinicle

                                                                                Oh god, fried salami. That used to be one of my late night main-stays. An everything bagel with cream cheese, fried salami, and sharp cheddar, topped with coarse salt. I would pop it into the microwave just until the cheese started to get a little melty. The cream cheese would be *waiting* to run out of the side on the first bite.

                                                                                1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                  Oh mah goodness, oh my goodness....that sounds sooooooo good.

                                                                                  1. re: mamachef

                                                                                    Savory, creamy, salty fat married on a wedge of carb usually are. Concoctions like this are why I can never own a restaurant . . . for public safety.

                                                                                    1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                      Sometimes, when I REALLY need to feel like an unhealthy Manatee, I roll dry salami around a chunk of cream cheese. Ok, the truth is, I roll about 20 slices around 20 chunks.

                                                                                      1. re: mamachef

                                                                                        Oh man, I'm glad I don't have any salami in the house right now...

                                                                                        1. re: EWSflash

                                                                                          when read out of context from the above posts, this is probably the most inadvertently funny comment I could ever imagine on a thread called "shameful food secrets."

                                                                                          1. re: mollyomormon

                                                                                            Braaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha......good one

                                                                                            1. re: mollyomormon

                                                                                              What, Molly? Who doesn't crave a good salami? With cream cheese?

                                                                                              The back of my neck feels funny . . . is there a mod standing behind me?

                                                                                              1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                I mean, yes, exactly. Everyone get your mind out of the gutter ;).

                                                                                                I think most of the responses here are not what I would consider shameful food secrets. I would think that would be more along the lines of: "I like to sneak behind my local mexican restaurant and eat nachos out of the dumpster" or something. That said, here is my shameful food secret. I used to eat absolutely obscene amount of candy, especially Nerds. My former co-workers knew this and gave me two Costco-size flats of boxes of Nerds when I left that job and was moving cross-country. I promised myself that I would make one of the Nerds flats last at least through the cross-country drive from Massachusetts to LA and then save the other for later. Instead, I ate both by the time we reached Illinois. As you might imagine, I no longer have much of a sweet tooth.

                                                                                                1. re: mollyomormon

                                                                                                  I've never heard of nerds - candy - what are they like?

                                                                                                  1. re: walker

                                                                                                    They are basically tiny lumps of sugar, some citric acid and food coloring. I'm sure most people here would find them painfully sweet and I probably would too if I could stand to eat them anymore.

                                                                                                  2. re: mollyomormon

                                                                                                    OK, so if we're getting shameful, I like to eat cold leftovers with my fingers directly out of the tupperware containers while standing in front of my open refrigerator. Doesn't matter what it is.

                                                                                                    1. re: jessicheese

                                                                                                      At my mom's we used to keep a chocolate silk pie in the box it came in with a fork in the pie tin so anyone could go in and eat standing at the fridge and not "have to bother" with another fork or a plate or anything silly like that...

                                                                                                      1. re: mariacarmen

                                                                                                        We did that at my mom's house too and sometimes we still do! Cakes and pies and sometimes casseroles and salads. I think it depends on how good it is. "Yes, but is it so good it gets its own fork?"

                                                                                                      2. re: jessicheese

                                                                                                        Lynne Kasper has a recipe in one of her books for sweet and sour meatballs, and in the headnote recommends them as good leftovers, but adds that "my husband eats them stone cold in front of the refrigerator."

                                                                                          2. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                            You should try applewood smoked bacon on an everything bagel with lots of cream cheese. Definitely not kosher but it tastes so good.

                                                                                            1. re: bigbob

                                                                                              OMG that sounds so good right now.

                                                                                        2. can we talk about frozen chicken nuggets?

                                                                                          No matter what form (popcorn, "nugget" or dinosaur-shaped,) frozen, processed "all-white-meat" chicken formed parts always have a soft spot in my heart. I usually keep a box somewhere in the freezer especially for those impulse-ridden times of the month. Give me processed meat (with honey for dipping) or give me DEATH!

                                                                                          3 Replies
                                                                                          1. re: CarmenR

                                                                                            Love these. Have to be careful, have been know to keep going back to heat more in toaster oven... then, oops, all done. One sitting with ranch dressing, ketchup and honey mustard, a little of each. What else?

                                                                                            Will sip pickle juice from the jar. Peanut butter on (white) bread, with carefully lined up chocolate chips on top, nuke for 15 seconds. Fold in half, eat with head tilted back or get liquid pb all over floor. Or nuke a couple of spoonfuls of pb in a bowl, then spoon chocolate ice cream over and fold together. Ragu pasta sauce over kraft mac and cheese (with cottage cheese and a handful of mozzarella mixed in). Butter crackers with cream cheese and halved kalmata olives, plus some pre-sliced pepperoni. That itself is dinner when hubbie is out of town.

                                                                                            Yes, vienna sausages, and love the cheese ravioli in a can - kroger brand is fine with me. Makes for good drunk-food, too, but that's another post entirely.

                                                                                            Sounds like dinner to me!

                                                                                            1. re: CarmenR

                                                                                              I have a weakness for chicken strips with ranch. Soooo bad but sooo good!

                                                                                              1. re: tracylee

                                                                                                Oh my! don't even get me started about chicken. I love to get a big bag of chicken bits, always battered with crumbs! and microwave them until they are juicy, but not crispy, ad get barbecue sauce and ranch, sometimes mayonaise, and just dip and chew chip chew ect. I love chicken!

                                                                                            2. I must be even more of a freak because I love the blue box powdered mac n cheese--but I won't take it over real!

                                                                                              I get random intense cravings for smores.

                                                                                              I love fried pickles at the bowling alley. And I would take a greasy piece of cheese pizza over a gourmet one any day of the week.

                                                                                              12 Replies
                                                                                              1. re: bblonde

                                                                                                What are fried pickles? Is this a regional treat? What am I missing?

                                                                                                1. re: Sinicle

                                                                                                  If it's anything like what I've had (we call them pickle chips in my region), these are dill pickles sliced into chips (not lengthwise), battered, and deep-fried. For me, the first taste sensation registered as too greasy, followed by a salt bite, and then the tang of the pickle. I think it's the aftertaste that gets converts, when all of those flavors mingle on the tongue. I went from saying, "Uh, no" to, "Huh" and then, "Oh, I want more" in just a short period of time.

                                                                                                  The pickles themselves have to be damn good ones though.

                                                                                                  1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                    I lived in Baltimore for law school, and frequently saw the "pickle chips" in bars- little slices, battered and fried- so good! That said, while in Memphis, I also saw dill spears given the same treatment- still good! Either way, glorious.

                                                                                                    1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                      That sounds utterly delicious. if you haven't already, try pickle chips, dipped in ranch. not the deep fried ones, just pickles slices in ranch. not that hidden valley crap, kroger, or whatever cheap kind of ranch isn't too thick or tangy. get the cheap runny stuff.

                                                                                                  2. re: bblonde

                                                                                                    I get incredibly intense cravings for smores. We cave to them a few years ago, but always have a bottle of champagne to go with them.

                                                                                                    ETA: I can't stand with you on the fried pickles tho. Had them once in Traverse City in 1993. Still get a little queasy from the memory. Mine was a half a spear, sliced length wise. Maybe that was the problem.

                                                                                                    1. re: debbiel

                                                                                                      I do think lengthwise would be a problem. Also, like anything fried, the oil has to be the right temperature. Dipped in ranch, oh yeah. I also think the 25 cent cups of beer (many of them) go a long way in making the pickles tasty. Thank goodness I'm a horrible bowler and am only at an alley maybe once a year. Talk about heart attack in a little package.

                                                                                                      1. re: bblonde

                                                                                                        The beers have nothing to do with it. These spears are delicious. I tried them for the first time last year on a business trip to Nashville. Cornmeal batter...chipotle ranch dipping sauce. Amazing. Sure, I don't know what they taste like sober, but I am absolutely convinced the beer has nothing to do with it. I need to buy myself a salt lick.

                                                                                                        1. re: LA Buckeye Fan

                                                                                                          I'm so bad about salt! I eat WAY too much salt on everything...
                                                                                                          Heres my confession, and I eat it late at night, so nobody sees.
                                                                                                          I get the sweet yummy crunchy 12 grain bread, and put atleast 1/8 cup of butter on each slice. I LOVE BUTTER.
                                                                                                          not hydrogenated soy bean oil, not partially hydrogenated, Cream, and salt. I can't stand fake butter. I put butter on everything. It's so unhealthy but it's so... delicious, and salty and, not too soggy, but still kinda crunchy.
                                                                                                          AND no! you can't get hard butter and wait for it to melt, you have to get thawed butter thats been on the counter for a few hours, and just slather it on there like its the last stick of butter you will ever see again. Its such golden caramelly brown shiny deliciousness. I eat it almost everyday and I don't care how big my thighs get! hahaha.

                                                                                                    2. re: bblonde

                                                                                                      I have an indoor hibachi (as were used for pu pu platters back in the day) EXPRESSLY for making s'mores. ;) I went on a huge quest for it about 10 years ago, but one of my friends beat me to the punch and surprised me with it as a gift. NICE! Then again, now that I have a fireplace, I just sit in front of it on cold nights and roast away when the mood strikes.

                                                                                                        1. re: Veggo

                                                                                                          You know I'm a sugar girl and a big kid in an adult suit. You've come to expect nothing less, no? :)

                                                                                                    3. I love canned tuna (packed in oil), thinned out mushroom soup, and crushed potato chip casserole. I blame it on being exposed to it repeatedly as a kid, but there you are. I love the stuff!

                                                                                                      1. I like overcooked pasta with butter and salt.

                                                                                                        And Campbell's cream of mushroom soup, undiluted.

                                                                                                        1 Reply
                                                                                                        1. re: tastesgoodwhatisit

                                                                                                          I love to cook MY hamburger (From a local cow farm) NOT from a mass cow factory, but from a nice place that only houses about 12 cows at a time, and feeds them Really expensive food, and they taste like love, in a pan, with garlic powder, onion salt, mrs. dash garlic and herb, salt, and fresh ground pepper, and make some Barilla whole grain pasta, and put COPIOUS amounts of butter in it, and mix it with the delicious, greasy hamburger, and eat atleast 2 pound of it.

                                                                                                        2. I love to twirl pasta into peanut butter. It tastes really decadent, sweet, and savory at the same time. YUM

                                                                                                          1. For my inner five year old: canned tomato soup, alphabet pasta (orzo will do) and cubes of "orange" cheese. The hot soup almost melts the cheese, but its not all goo. Must watch sit on the floor and watch bad TV while eating.

                                                                                                            1. When I was a meat eater I would occasionally eat a can of Chef Boy-r-dee beef ravioli, straight out of the can.

                                                                                                              Nowadays?...should I be ashamed of snacking on oyster crackers dipped in a mustard-ketchup mix? Or toast smeared with either mustard or mayo?

                                                                                                              10 Replies
                                                                                                              1. re: debbiel

                                                                                                                Beefaroni with picante sauce in it.

                                                                                                                Salt and vinegar chips crushed on ice cream

                                                                                                                Tabasco on tuna fish sandwich with potato chips

                                                                                                                The baby Gerber meat sticks. Kinda like a healthier vienna sausage. Eat them on crackers with Tabasco.

                                                                                                                Ranch dressing on pizza and nacho's

                                                                                                                I could go on for days...

                                                                                                                1. re: Liveitloud

                                                                                                                  Okay. I want salt and vinegar chips crushed on ice cream. Now.

                                                                                                                  1. re: debbiel

                                                                                                                    Macaroni and cheese in a box...made with as little milk as possible so the cheese powder doesn't mix in completely because I like the lumps.

                                                                                                                    Tuna mixed in (sometimes) to the mac and cheese making it feel ever more healthy

                                                                                                                    Bad pizza/cold pizza

                                                                                                                    That chicken casserole with the Campbell soup and rice. I could probably eat all of it in a day.

                                                                                                                    Tomato paste out of the can when I am cooking (as mentioned by others)

                                                                                                                    And now I'm hungry... ;)

                                                                                                                    1. re: lovessushi

                                                                                                                      Try tuna instead of the chicken in that casserole - delicious! And decadently lazy for its comforting greatness. I usually dump in frozen petite peas and top w/end of the chips/bread crumbs/cracker crumbs - so very good.

                                                                                                                      1. re: debbiel

                                                                                                                        Ha when my sister and I were young and we got a treat from the "treat store" one of us would get an Oreo ice cream sandwich and one would get a bag of Humpy Dumpy salt and vinegar chips.. Together we would share both of then, dipping the chips in the oreo ice cream part of the sandwich.

                                                                                                                        1. re: hungryabbey

                                                                                                                          'The treat store'. Fantastic.

                                                                                                                          I had two brothers, arm-pinching misers, the both of them.

                                                                                                                      2. re: Liveitloud

                                                                                                                        i have to ask....what flavour of ice cream do you eat salt and vinegar chips on?! i may have to try it

                                                                                                                        1. re: wanderer

                                                                                                                          I have a hangover and don't even remotely want to think about this.

                                                                                                                    2. My favorite breakfast is two over-easy eggs with some of those crappy faux-cheese slices melted on top; served on toasted, buttered English muffins. And a third slice to mop up the runny yolks.

                                                                                                                      PLEASE DON'T TELL ANYONE!

                                                                                                                      1. I like to take a frozen mac n cheese and after cooking add a can of tuna and a small can of peas , some mustard , mix all together, it is similar to the old fashioned tuna noodle casserole.

                                                                                                                        Another is a breakfast sandwich: toasted sourdough, mayo, sliced tomatoes, fried spam, fried egg, and a slice of american cheese all melting together.

                                                                                                                        1. Mine also involves Spam - Candied Spam sandwich - sliced, cooked till crisping, deglaze with a bit of water, then mix in some dijon coating all, then sprinkle in some brown sugar and a few shakes of pepper or pepper flakes and reduce till Spam is lovingly glazed. In the mean time I toast 2 pieces of white bread and slather on the mayo, add layers of candied spam and I'm in heaven! My husband thought I was a freaking genius for this, hahaha :-) Yeah thats me, genius of the white trash arts. But boy are they tasty!

                                                                                                                          24 Replies
                                                                                                                          1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                            Ha. I can totally see that recipe on the back of a Ladies Home Journal, circa 1956, with a suggestion to pair it with your favorite Campbell's soup.

                                                                                                                            My boyfriend loves Spam (he always buy the Spam 'Lite"). I can't wait to tell him about *candied* Spam.

                                                                                                                            1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                                              sounds like a forerunner to "glazed spam loaf" from The I Hate To Cook Book. Nom Nom!

                                                                                                                              1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                Instant mashed potatoes with melted cheese.

                                                                                                                                Bush's vegetarian baked beans with melted cheese.

                                                                                                                                Canned French's fried onions. Eaten right out of the can while hiding in my pantry.

                                                                                                                                Capri Sun foil "juice" packs. For the kid in me.

                                                                                                                                Saltines spread with butter. Fat on salty fat. Yummmmmm!

                                                                                                                                Miri (who is now famished! lol)

                                                                                                                                1. re: Miri1

                                                                                                                                  Oh my goodness! I love saltines with butter on them, and sometimes jelly too. butter and jelly, A perfect couple.

                                                                                                                                2. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                  Yay a fellow Peg Brackenite, mamachef!!!

                                                                                                                                  1. re: buttertart

                                                                                                                                    Buttertart, I read her books (inherited from my mother, who really DID hate to cook and it showed) like novels. She cracks me up, and if you look at some of her stuff, even retro as it is now, she was a ways ahead of her time. Love me some Peg Bracken!

                                                                                                                                    1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                      I've been reading her since I was a kid. So fun!

                                                                                                                                3. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                                                  onceadaylily; I can just picture it now candied Spam finger sandwiches :-D maybe with a tart jam and cream cheese on crustless white , hahaha, that would be hilarious to serve at a football party.

                                                                                                                                  I tell you though these sandwiches are addicting, but thankfully so rich, one and I'm done for a good long while.

                                                                                                                                  mamachef; I will have to track down the recipe for the "glazed spam loaf" sounds shamefully delicious!

                                                                                                                                  1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                    Ha ha, jam and cream cheese sandwiches was my 'brown bag' lunch in elementary school, in the eighties. My mother, who ruled the pantry with an iron fist, thought that was so strange and 'cute' that I was the only one of my siblings allowed to custom-order a lunch that needed something 'extra' from the grocery budget.

                                                                                                                                    If I made glazed spam loaf, the boyfriend would likely drop to his knees before me. Hmm.

                                                                                                                                    1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                                                      SO on their knees are more than enough reason to learn any recipe.

                                                                                                                                    2. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                      If you scroll down, you'll find a good approximation!

                                                                                                                                  2. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                    Just M, that sounds great, it brings back a memory of coating a loaf of spam with mustard, sprinkle with brown sugar, and put in a few cloves on top and bake in the oven.

                                                                                                                                    1. re: malibumike

                                                                                                                                      Strangely, I'd only been exposed to cold Spam sandwiches w/ Miracle Whip, lettuce, tomato and sometimes Am cheese. So I'm not sure I ever thought of it a cook-able. But then I also thought people actually ate cream of whatever soup as soup :-) I learned much when I got married ;->

                                                                                                                                    2. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                      OMG candied Spam, anything spam. Just the thought of it kills my appetite. More for you right? :>)

                                                                                                                                        1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                          After my year in Viet Nam, I swore I'd never eat Spam or rice for the rest of my life. After over 40 years, I do eat rice now and then.

                                                                                                                                          1. re: grampart

                                                                                                                                            grampart: when I was growing up, my dad was very easy going and would happily eat anything my mom would put on the table -- with only one exception... spam. This was due to being forced to eat it daily when he was in the Army during WWII. Because I adored my dad, spam never had any appeal for me either, and still doesn't.

                                                                                                                                            1. re: grampart

                                                                                                                                              Yep, Nam (and other places) will do that for you.

                                                                                                                                              I'd say in our family a Spam attack happens about twice a year when I try and reload the emergency pantry. And Spam fried rice w/extra crispy bits of spam is always on the pig out list while we rotate the stock. Although if I offered my husband anything resembling an MRE there is a problem!

                                                                                                                                              1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                                interesting to hear others say this because my dad feels the same way about rice after his military service during the Korean War.

                                                                                                                                          2. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                            I love seeing the words "Spam" and "deglaze" in one recipe!

                                                                                                                                            1. re: Jennlevy

                                                                                                                                              Ha ha, it does give a certain jenesequa ;->

                                                                                                                                              1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                                Ha! Points for wordplay just M!

                                                                                                                                          3. BBQ Lays potato chips. Also, used to love Fritos corn chips dipped in Orange Fanta. have a feeling would still love it. Fried baloney sandwiches with mayo. McD's Filet-o-Fish sandwiches - it's been years (and owing to a certain naming scandal, i'll not be having those again.) Jack-in-the-box regular tacos. Vienna sausages. Salami and cream cheese, as someone else mentioned, too. Green goddess dip from a package with plain Lays.

                                                                                                                                            1. A local restaurant here (Goldie's) has a "pickle bar." Basically 3 or 4 different types of pickles. I actually hate pickles... but for some reason if I eat them in a specific way at this specific restaurant I like them. Slices of pickle, put on a captain's cracker, glued together with bright taxi cab yellow mustard. My bf (who just eats his pickles straight) will sit and watch me construct and eat these and he calls them my white trash hors' d oevers. I also admit to a fondness for Cheez Whiz on Ritz crackers.

                                                                                                                                              16 Replies
                                                                                                                                              1. re: Firegoat

                                                                                                                                                If we were voting.....you'd be in the running with this one! Love it!

                                                                                                                                                1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                  please don't tell my friends......

                                                                                                                                                  1. re: Firegoat

                                                                                                                                                    I was telling my daughter about this thread, and she asked me if I'd copped to loving raw ground meat. It's true; when I buy a pkg. at the supermarket, I always re-wrap it, and I always snatch bites of it during putting it away. We're not talking tartare here, folks, just good old 90% lean ground beef. I can't believe I forgot this one -!

                                                                                                                                                    1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                      My father used to do that! Even with (get ready) sausage meat. And lived to be almost 87.

                                                                                                                                                      1. re: buttertart

                                                                                                                                                        whew....sausage meat....gulp....! Actually it's funny, because in this day and age, with pork being basically free of the trich. stigma, I should have no problem with this...but old prejudices die hard. But like firegoat said, I shouldn't yuck someone else's yum!!

                                                                                                                                                      2. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                        I'm trying to decide how to respond. Awesome? Do you at least salt it? My you're brave.... still trying to decide... but I'm following my new motto... don't yuck someone else's yum... and your daughter is AWESOME

                                                                                                                                                        1. re: Firegoat

                                                                                                                                                          Salt wrecks the whole "coppery-tasting" experience, firegoat!! No, I just take little, teaspoon-sized nibblies while portioning and wrapping. By the time I've finished, I'm sure I've consumed a good 6-8 ozs.
                                                                                                                                                          My daughter read thru this thread and said, "it sounds like people are veering from shameful food to just plain trashy food (which she has no problem with, believe me), but Ma, I know how you can get it back on track, because your worst food secret IS as bad as eating nachos from the dumpster behind taco bell."
                                                                                                                                                          Yeah, she's pretty awesome, kind of a No BS kinda gal.

                                                                                                                                                          1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                            well I wouldn't want to wreck the coppery tasting experience. I am indeed not one to yuck on your yum.

                                                                                                                                                            1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                              I am a little skeeved tho. I'm going to just blame myself and my limited upbringing for that.

                                                                                                                                                          2. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                            My father used to do that, too. And when he was feeling generous, he would slip us a little bit of it to snack on, too.

                                                                                                                                                            1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                              I remember doing that as a child. My friend Angie and I were probably 7 and we would go to my house after school to hang out until our Mom's got off work. Our favorite ways of eating it were with salt or on a saltine w/salt or ketchup and we loved it! After Angie's mom found out though, we were no longer allowed to hang out and I was told by my mother to NEVER do that again or I'd get worms!

                                                                                                                                                              1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                                                Oh, yes--worms! The same ones Nanny said I'd get for ingesting raw cookie dough, batter, etc. I hope they're happy (the worms)--at least they're well-fed! HA HA HA HA!

                                                                                                                                                                1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                  Well feed worms! HA HA HA! Why Yes they are ;-)

                                                                                                                                                        2. re: Firegoat

                                                                                                                                                          Nuh uh! cheez whiz inside a bugle like an ice cream cone.
                                                                                                                                                          If you're feeling exotic you can also put jet puffed in it, or get a chocolate peanut butter bugle and put cheez whiz, or jet puffed in that sucker mmmmm(:

                                                                                                                                                        3. Kraft mac & cheese, baked beans & a sliced hotdog all mixed together. I lived on that concoction in college.

                                                                                                                                                          1. Luckily, (or un as the case may be), my husband and I have the same food secret. We both love raw cookie dough. More so than cooked cookies. In fact, we buy the giant tub of Tollhouse Cookie Dough at Costco, and "sneak" spoonfuls out of it regularly. We both claim that we buy it to make cookies for the kids, but honestly, I can't remember the last time we made them chocolate chip cookies and yet just last week, we had to buy another tub of dough . . .

                                                                                                                                                            1 Reply
                                                                                                                                                            1. re: tzurriz

                                                                                                                                                              That's a secret? I thought eating raw cookie dough was a dorm room staple for most college freshman girls. I had a roommate addicted to the stuff. She'd open a tube and half the floor came running. Hmmm maybe you're my former roommate??? :>)

                                                                                                                                                            2. Potato chips either dipped in ice cream or mixed with M&Ms. To me, there's nothing better than chocolate and salt mixed together.

                                                                                                                                                              For the past few family gatherings, my aunt has made chocolate dipped platters that contain strawberries, biscottis, pretzels and Pringles. The Pringles are always the first to disappear!

                                                                                                                                                              2 Replies
                                                                                                                                                              1. re: robyn76

                                                                                                                                                                I think your aunt is a goddess and should take over the world.

                                                                                                                                                                1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                                  I have always liked to attend children's birthday parties because the combination of potato chips, ice cream, and birthday cake is so delicious. There is nowhere else you can get that mix!

                                                                                                                                                              2. Velveeta mac n cheese with chunks of salami in it (I usually go for Hebrew National). Tuna casserole with tuna, noodles, and Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup. (both of these are also good as cold leftovers.) Corn chips topped with grated cheddar or jack, maybe some salsa, in the microwave: fake-o nachos. Very mayo-y tuna salad eaten with corn chips, like a dip. Haven't had it in years, but frozen fish sticks with Hellman's tartar sauce are awesome.

                                                                                                                                                                1. In the 70's, I was an alarm tech on the night shift. We had keys to various premises, to go in and work when they were closed. One of them was a candy factory. HAHAHAHAHA!
                                                                                                                                                                  Feeling vaguely guilty, I eventually asked about their attitude toward "tasting". Their response, no matter how much I stuffed myself with, it wouldn't be a drop compared to what they spilled on the floor. Eat all I want, just don't remove any from the building. ALL RIGHT!
                                                                                                                                                                  My favorite was always the chocolate-covered peanuts, which they did very well. Imagine a hot tub full of chocolate-covered peanuts.....

                                                                                                                                                                  1 Reply
                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: ShepherdBGoode

                                                                                                                                                                    You just reminded me of an interesting Christmas. My boyfriend's father runs a candy factory, and knowing my love of chocolate, gave me one of the *slabs* that they use in their machines. It was about two feet long and a foot wide, and six inches thick (the boyfriend had to carry it to the car for me). When I opened it, I looked at my boyfriend and we both started laughing. The night before my boss gave me an 'extra' Christmas bonus: a two foot tall chocolate Santa.

                                                                                                                                                                    I guess word gets around, about me and the chocolate.

                                                                                                                                                                    I had a very small apartment kitchen then, and counter-space was at a minimum as it was, without fifteen pounds of chocolate mucking up the works. Whenever I want a hunk off the slab, I had to use an ice pick and a mallet. Santa got stuffed into two extra large freezer bags. We took him down to the alley and made him . . . more manageable. I'm not sure what the neighbors thought of that.

                                                                                                                                                                    I would rather have traveled *to* the chocolate, and then left it there when I clocked out.

                                                                                                                                                                  2. shake and bake pork chops - and i will gnaw the meat off the bones. mrbuffer looks on in amazement but sorry, there's meat left on those bones.

                                                                                                                                                                    i will, at times, squirt the reddi-whip directly into my mouth. mrbuffer doesn't see that.
                                                                                                                                                                    canned frosting right off the spoon

                                                                                                                                                                    1. Man, what a great topic.

                                                                                                                                                                      I have always adored the Original Kraft Mac & Cheese dinner--the one with the cheese sauce in an envelope that you just snip open and squeeze out over the cooked mac. I make that for myself for lunch/dinner when I'm dining solo. I remember my mother serving that with veal parmesan when I was a kid. No wonder I'm a salt addict.

                                                                                                                                                                      My-T-Fine pudding from a box. My mom would serve it hot for breakfast and call it chocolate soup.

                                                                                                                                                                      In my single days I would mix a batch of Lipton's onion dip and have that with potato chips and diet Coke for dinner. Yum.

                                                                                                                                                                      I make hot fudge sauce to serve with ice cream but the truth is that I will heat up the jar in the micro and have spoonfuls of the sauce straight, no ice cream to interfere.

                                                                                                                                                                      18 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: Cakegirl

                                                                                                                                                                        That ain't the original, dollink, the original original had a packet of powder you mixed with milk and butter to make the sauce. Staple of my childhood. And I used to salt IT!

                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: buttertart

                                                                                                                                                                          Cakegirl must be a bit younger than us. To me, that's still the new and fancy version.

                                                                                                                                                                          There was nothing like shaking that envelope to get all the powder away from the top before you tore it, and then discovering you were out of milk. Or butter. Or milk and butter.

                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                                                                                            Must be. Making it was my mom's department, I just got it on a plate with the saltshaker at hand.

                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                                                                                              Yes, that is the fancy version... I remember the technicolor powder. I also made it with water in desperation when I ran out of milk.

                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: Firegoat

                                                                                                                                                                                I remember once when I was little, mom was sick and dad was making kraft mac & cheese with hotdogs for dinner but we were out of milk. So he measured out the water, heated it in the microwave then dissolved two teaspoons of powdered coffee creamer and used that in place of milk.

                                                                                                                                                                              2. re: onceadaylily

                                                                                                                                                                                Hmm...I remember the cheese sauce in a small can, I think. circa early 70s.

                                                                                                                                                                            2. re: Cakegirl

                                                                                                                                                                              Is this Kraft Mac and Cheese good? I have never tried it and people tell me that it is very good. I presume it is easy to make, right?

                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                                                                                                                                                                It may be something you have to have grown up with. I loved it but tried it again a few years ago and was quite disappointed. It's very easy to make (but don't buy the cup-style Easy Mac ones, I found those just nasty).

                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: buttertart

                                                                                                                                                                                  I think I should try it. I may have tried it, but if I did, I completely don't remember anything about it. Ok, I will try to avoid the Cup-style.

                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                                                                                                                                                                    Why not? It's dead cheap. You might even like it. My older brothers must have put themselves around a metric ton of the stuff each by this stage of the game.

                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: buttertart

                                                                                                                                                                                      My husband and son love to eat it by scooping it up with Doritos.

                                                                                                                                                                                    2. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                                                                                                                                                                      As a warning CK...Kraft Mac & Cheese may indeed have to be something you grow up with. My husband is Dutch and tried if for the first time after he met me. He finds it disgusting. Although as a professional chef he may just feel the obligation to find powdered cheese gross:)

                                                                                                                                                                                  2. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                                                                                                                                                                    It's more like noodles in a cheese sauce than it is like a real baked mac & cheese. Actually, bares little to no resemblance to the latter. Is it good... well there is a reason it keeps popping up here as a "shameful food secret."

                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                                                                                                                                                                      Oh, Kraft Mac and Cheese is my favorite food ever. I can eat the whole box by myself. D:

                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: Samanthyc

                                                                                                                                                                                        Ok, I am going to my supermarket and get one box of Kraft Mac and Cheese and one box of Stouffe Mac and Cheese and eat them in a week or so and see how they taste.

                                                                                                                                                                                        :D

                                                                                                                                                                                    2. re: Cakegirl

                                                                                                                                                                                      I grew up on the "Blue Box," too, and make it now for my son (even though now using the powdered cheese stuff kinda makes me cringe). I don't HAVE to feed him this... I am perfectly capable of making a quickie mac 'n cheese without Kraft's help, but it's SO TASTY, I make it so I can eat some... with kosher salt, and several generous shakes of the bottle of Frank's Red Hot Sauce (for mine, not his). Talk about a sodium bomb. My weak excuse to the outside world: I don't want to deprive my son of this source of food joy from my youth. Ha.

                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                                                                                                                                                                          No,But I don't think food has ever made me sick,although I did get sick from home made Kahlua but thats a different subject.

                                                                                                                                                                                        2. re: davecrf

                                                                                                                                                                                          davecrf: i love you. there i said it.

                                                                                                                                                                                        3. Smoked mussels from a can with extra salt and lemon juice added.

                                                                                                                                                                                          Oh, and, the most shameful of all, hamburger helper.

                                                                                                                                                                                          No, I don't live in a trailer park.

                                                                                                                                                                                          2 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: jennc

                                                                                                                                                                                            really, smoked mussels in a can are shameful? those were one of the things that made me feel like a fancy food person, 25 years ago!

                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: jennc

                                                                                                                                                                                              in college my roommate and I would eat the Lasagna Hamburger helper ..... with extra ketchup on top. sometimes extra cheese if we had it. If we're alone for the weekend together (some 20 years later) we just might whip out that and some Jiffy brand blueberry muffin mix ... another college staple

                                                                                                                                                                                            2. I know this really is Retro, but I love Jello with fruit cocktail and a slice of pound cake. We didn't always have money for ice cream for dessertwhen I was growing up, so Jello with fruit cocktail or sliced bananas was a stand-in. I still love it!!!!!

                                                                                                                                                                                              1. I'm with you on the Velveeta mac & cheese. I must also confess to a weakness for Captain Crunch (original and peanut butter). Living in Ireland and can't get them anywhere here. Every once in a while my mother ships some over:)

                                                                                                                                                                                                15 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: dotdarling

                                                                                                                                                                                                  Cap'n Crunch RULES! Try chicken strips coated in it--FABULOUS! Details here:
                                                                                                                                                                                                  http://chowhound.chow.com/topics/6385...

                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                    I remember a DDD episode where one diner coated there french toast in crunched up Cap'n Crunch. It looked like caramelized goodness! Then was served with whipped cream for the milk and mixed berries to complete this well balanced breakfast. You know the old boxes of cereal use to have a picture of the cereal, milk, two slices of toast and OJ as the picture of a balanced breakfast ;-? I've got to find a time to make these. Hmm maybe the first day of school :->

                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                                                                                      Neat idea--I would want at least a forkful or two or three. That could be a great cooking show challenge--using CC as the special ingredient!

                                                                                                                                                                                                      You'll love CC chicken. Try it with (block your ears/avert your eyes, haters!) sriracha Miracle Whip. For this kinda thing, it's even better than sriracha mayo...and I am a mayo lover, but there is a place in this world for Miracle Whip...IN MY REFRIGERATOR! :) And I feel no shame sayin' so.

                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                        I take it you mean regular captain crunch? And MW/siracha sound delish. Somethings just need that tangy zip, like my Gran's pineapple coleslaw. I wonder what peanut butter CC would be like w/ the siracha kick. Oooh maybe marinade the chicken in some satay sauce first. I think your right this would be a fun cooking show challenge :-)

                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Yes, please. Regular Cap'n Crunch.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          ITA re MW and "that tangy zip"--precisely! It was the key ingredient to Nanny's potato salad and I use the same dressing for coleslaw and chicken salad (though at first I used mayo). LOVE the satay, then CC idea.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          We will both have to laugh one day when we see this on Iron Chef: Cap'n Crunch Challenge! :)

                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                            Ha haha, I can hear Alton now "Not very many people know this, but CC was the Chairman's favorite cereal as a child. Well heck who hasn't been friends with the Captain" Hahaha!

                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: just_M

                                                                                                                                                                                                              True enough! :) Good luck with your experimentation and may the Captain be with you!

                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                                not fair....all this talk about the Cap'n and I can't buy it. I actually called my mother and asked her to send some.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: dotdarling

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Haaaaaaaaands across the water, haaaaaaaands across the sky...WOOHOO!

                                                                                                                                                                                                        2. re: kattyeyes

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Katty, I am in complete agreement with you, I too love mayo, usually best foods/hellmans, but miracle whip rules when making tuna salad sandwiches.

                                                                                                                                                                                                    2. re: dotdarling

                                                                                                                                                                                                      Dot,

                                                                                                                                                                                                      Are you in the Republic of Ireland or Northern Ireland? The reason I asked is that I know several American cereals are nearly wiped out in Britain. For example, Lucky Charms cereal is no longer avaliable over there.

                                                                                                                                                                                                      http://www.petitiononline.com/b1e9t8h6/
                                                                                                                                                                                                      http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions...

                                                                                                                                                                                                      I heard one of the best gift you can give to a Brit is a box of Lucky Charms cereal.

                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: Chemicalkinetics

                                                                                                                                                                                                        CK,

                                                                                                                                                                                                        I'm in the Republic. Now there's a petition worth signing. Thanks. Love the Lucky Charms too. Of course the only way to eat them is to eat the marshmallow charms first and then the cereal.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: dotdarling

                                                                                                                                                                                                          I believe that both British and Ireland (Republic) have some regulations about selling these American sugar high cereals, like Lucky Charms.

                                                                                                                                                                                                      2. re: dotdarling

                                                                                                                                                                                                        My favorite memory of Captain Crunch is actually from the box- I can still picture the Captain saying "I stand on my guarantee" while literally standing on the guarantee.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        Echoed later in the 70s on a Utopia album: the caption "outstanding in their field" under a photo of the band out standing in a field. Still makes me grin.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: eclecticsynergy

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Hahaha, my Dad, who has always been a farmer, always says he's "outstanding in his field". Then again, he'll say he's "outstanding on the golf course".

                                                                                                                                                                                                      3. Pancakes and Gravy. (instead of syrup)

                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. Frozen rolls, and frozen roll dough. Specifically Sister Schubert's frozen rolls- so good and Rich's frozen roll dough.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          3 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: vafarmwife

                                                                                                                                                                                                            Mmmm I love the Rhodes frozen bread dough and yeast rolls..... and even more shamefull... I've been known to roll those frozen balls of roll dough in melted butter, cinnamon and sugar and put them in a bundt pan and bake a big ol' pan of completely unhealthy monkey bread.... then eat THAT with even more butter!

                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: Firegoat

                                                                                                                                                                                                              I see your shameful monkey bread and raise you a disgustingly delish "dough boy". Rhodes bread dough thawed and risen, then cut into thirds, stretched thin and deep fried until golden brown. Top with butter and powdered sugar or maple syrup.

                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: JRicher

                                                                                                                                                                                                                oh.... those need some honey.... damn you.....

                                                                                                                                                                                                          2. Pillsbury refrigerated raw chocolate chip cookie dough.

                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. I like those nasty, olive drab mushy peas in a can, called Le Sueur. Sometimes, I eat them with mayo and onion. I'm so ashamed.

                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. Everyone's secrets seem to revolve around cheese. Haha...
                                                                                                                                                                                                                1.) I LOVE kraft singles. That and string cheese were the only cheese I knew for most of my childhood.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                2.) Brie with furikake sprinkled on it. (the kind with bonito and egg) I don't know why, it just works. I've polished off a whole wedge of brie this way (in one sitting). Shhhhh

                                                                                                                                                                                                                1 Reply
                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: chaseshadows

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Ohoo, I have to try this one. Sometimes I just pour some furikake in my hand and eat it straight up!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                2. Wow, I've read through all the posts and nobody here puts jelly on american cheese? (hey you said when nobody's looking)
                                                                                                                                                                                                                  My hubby eats cream cheese on soft pretzels.. amazing and yet shameful food comvo

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  11 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    OMG I had totally, totally forgotten this grade-school memory: a velveeta sandwich w/ grape jelly, and the jelly would kinda sop through the bread. Back to the sweet-salty thing, which to this day I love - but I could not eat this combo today. I don't THINK.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      I stand in front of the fridge and squeeze grape jelly on American cheese slices fold it over and pop into the mouth…

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      My other eat in front of the fridge thing is ketchup on a pickle… take a bite of a Vlassic dill, squeeze some ketchup on it and bite again, repeat until the pickle is gone (hey, you eat burgers with ketchup and pickles right?)

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Is it shameful to share brie and ice cream with my cat?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        <<Is it shameful to share brie and ice cream with my cat?>>
                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Quite the contrary! Your cat finds it shameful when you do NOT share such things. :)
                                                                                                                                                                                                                        >>^..^<<

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Is it shameful to share sunflower seeds in the shell with your corgi?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            I don't know how I missed this post - dill pickles with ketchup is one of my guilty pleasures.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        2. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Okay, this is one of the few on this thread that really made me go "ew" when I read it. Then I remembered liking certain cheeses and jelly. I think it's just the american that I'm reacting to. Now, cream cheese and soft pretzels? Almost anything is good with cream cheese, but soft pretzels? That would be fab.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: debbiel

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Cream cheese with Ritz crackers is also really delicious.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          2. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            My Mom used to get salt cravings... she'd cover an 8 oz slab of Philadelphia cream cheese with anchovy paste, mash it up with a couple tablespoons of milk and eat the whole thing with those tiny pretzel sticks.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                This is so far off-thread, we might as well retire it or re-name it "secret foodlust", because there's nothing shameful or vaguely trashy about the last several entries....

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  I was thinking that Philly and anchovy thing would make a nice dip! "What's in this stuff, hon, it's great?"

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          3. Mayo sandwich. Just a ton of mayo on squishy white bread. Shameful.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            2 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. StoveTop stuffing. I could prep and eat the whole dang box. By myself. Shame.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                8 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: grlwhoeats

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  I admit, I actually prefer StoveTop to the home-made my Mom makes. I buy it in the canister so I can make as many portions as I think I can down at a time. Hmmmmm, maybe this'll be my afternoon snack!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: grlwhoeats

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    I also love stovetop. I could definitely eat a whole box myself.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    1. re: hungryabbey

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Stovetop cornbread stuffing!! Hard to find the last year or so; maybe discontinued.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Like the late lamented Royal Butterscotch Pudding mix. They still make an instant imitation, but I long for the real thing- can't stand no-cook puddings...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      BTW, I agree about the Kraft mac & cheese in a cup (EasyMac?), no good at all.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      But the blue box, made with milk (or half & half!) and hot dogs or bacon mixed in... Mmmmm. Even Bac-O's in a pinch, while we're in confession mode.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      The Kraft DeLuxe (with liquid cheese in foil pouch) or Velveeta (also with pouch) and rounds of well-browned kielbasa...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Ever had cubes of salami on pizza? somehow the baking makes it taste almost like corned beef.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      And I agree with the posts upstream, a fried salami sandwich rocks. Fried bologna too, though IMO at a slightly less decadent level.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      And CoffeeMate creamer in fresh brewed iced tea, no lemon. Tastes like the little cans of Thai iced tea though I discovered the combination long before ever tasting Thai food.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      BTW, Heavy cream in good sweet fresh-brewed Ceylon iced tea (again, no lemon!) is an indulgence well worth trying.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      A friend gave me a couple of löbrau cookbooks a few years back: The White Trash Gourmet, and the Trailer Trash Cookbook, I think. Some shame-inducing recipes in there.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      PS: Löbrau is a beer on the cartoon show Futurama, itself a guilty pleasure, though one of a different sort.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      1. re: eclecticsynergy

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        I was thinking that was a pretty highbrow way to spell it. Viva Matt Groening.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. re: eclecticsynergy

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Eclecticsynergy, stovetop cornbread is still on the shelf... my husband is addicted to the stuff

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          when I make home made corn-bread dressing, I am now reduced to trying to replicate the stove-top flavor... I gave up and I just let him have the 'real stuff'

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. re: cgarner

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            cg, you might be able to replicate it for yourself with the addition of copious amounts of MSG.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. re: mamachef

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              ... and dried parsley! hahahaha

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      2. re: grlwhoeats

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        oh no, you just reminded me that when my boyfriend has bachelor days, he makes rice-a-roni chicken flavor. And then the next day, when I'm back, I seem to notice the cold leftover rice-a-roni disappearing forkful by forkful. I don't know where it's going. It probably has nothing to do with the slight yellow stain on my fingers....

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      3. when I was a kid, I'd pour coffee Mate non-dairy creamer (powdered) onto a spoon and eat it
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        I Loved the taste of that stuff... we have it at work now and I cringe when I look at it

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        it was always around the house in case we ran out of milk for Mom's coffee, and then I'd eat it and there'd be barely any left if she needed it

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        :-( *red faced shame

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        1. There seems to be a lot of replies involving peanut butter and I have two things that involve that wonderful substance. The first is a white bread sandwich with crunchy peanut butter and then add a heaping amount of Kraft sandwich spread to it! When we were kids we would have this all the time and I guess what I love about it is that salt & sweet combination that everyone seems to like but gets it in different ways. Now my wife wont let me bring the sandwich spread into the house, it grosses her out thinking about it.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          My second is actually one of my favorite all time restaurant must haves when visiting Cleveland and that is a peanut burger from Bearden's restaurant. A double burger with melted creamy peanut butter on a toasted bun and nothing else, its to die for, many think its gross but so so good!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. Fried egg sandwich. Fried in bacon fat. On yucky white soft white bread. Loaded with salt. Tastes like childhood at Grandma's house.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            1. Drinking pickle juice with Tobasco sauce mixed in it. Quaker oats from the packets (unflavored original) because their texture and flavor is just so much better than the kind that comes in a tall cardboard tub. I like to put French Vanilla flavored Splenda that's meant for coffee into my yogurt.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Libby's canned pumpkin straight from the can with a little bit of cinnamon. I haven't been able to find it anywhere! I've been told there was a giant pumpkin shortage D:
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              When I pop microwave popcorn, I like it burned slightly. Not quite charred beyond recognition, but just so that it's a brownish-grey with smoke coming from the bag. Then smothered in Tobasco sauce.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              1. I just thought of this one as I was eating it last night.... The Jennnie-O Turkey "loaf" that comes in the foil pan with the cardboard top. I could eat it once a week easily to take care of my turkey cravings without dealing with a big bird or breast.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                2 Replies
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. re: Firegoat

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  My husband LOVES this. I despise it, but will buy it for him every so often. You would think I prepared a gourmet meal the way he reacts to this turkey loaf!!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  1. re: BeachNBoardwalk

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    My bf ADORES the stuff and got me hooked on it. I agree, I bet he enjoys that the most of anything I cook.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                2. Wow, so many secret food cravings :-)
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Whoever said pizza rolls, I am right there with you! Ramen soup, slices of cold american cheese loaded with mustard, (no bread needed!) and my Thanksgiving stuffing, COLD. I don't know if it's because I'm getting older but for some reason, I find no need to heat things up anymore :-)