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Most complicated and impossible recipe you know

I am just the most horrible person in the world. I just got one of those stupid chain email things where you have to send a recipe to the first person on the list and put your name on the bottom and send it out to a million people you know. The recipe is supposed to be so easy that you can just write it down without looking it up.

They don't know me.

What is your most impossible recipe? I want something so complicated, containing so many obscure and unattainable ingredients that no one could possibly understand it, never mind make it. If they're going to send me dumb email chain letters, they are going to get what they deserve.

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    1. Look for Bocuse's recipe for Poularde de Bresse truffee en vessie Joannes Nandron (Chicken with truffles in a bladder Joannes Nandron). A famous dish, fairly complex, plus fun with the pork bladder.

      7 Replies
      1. re: Sam Fujisaka

        Wish you were still around to explain this, Sam. Does anyone else know what a bladder might be? And how one could procure such a thing? I suspect this is an item only available in the more remote spots that Sam traveled.

        1. re: pikawicca

          A bladder is a bladder, from a pig. Seriously.

          1. re: pikawicca

            a good butcher shop might be able to get you one, those guys usually have so many connections where they could get you pretty much anything...Of course that's if you can find a good butcher shop, there don't seem to be too many around anymore...

            1. re: pikawicca

              Does Sam no longer post here? I really enjoy reading his insights.

                1. re: sommrluv

                  I'm sorry to inform you that Sam passed away last year. We all miss his insights.

                  1. re: pikawicca

                    Thank you both for answering me. I'm not always a full time chow user and sadly, missed the thread. He had many fans and it sounds as if he is very missed, and was a wonderful man besides.

            2. LOL! How about that Julia Child thing, Pate de canard en croute, that was featured in "Julie & Julia"? You know, the one that starts off with deboning a five-pound duck? Or there's always Beef Wellington.... Have fun!

              2 Replies
              1. re: visciole

                Actually, beef wellington is a cinch.

              2. I make this about once a year. The ingredients aren't difficult to come by but the process will have you hitting on the wine bottle in the cupboard -

                http://allrecipes.com/recipe/baumkuch...

                I saw a recipe for making yogurt in a goat stomach someplace but I can't find it at the moment.

                1. Whatever it is should involve a pastry crust, a live lobster, truffles, foie gras, and a classical sauce that looks simple until you realize that it requires three kinds of stock. Extra points for stuffing at least one whole animal into another whole animal, procedures requiring a larding needle, and aspic or chaud-froid.

                  4 Replies
                  1. re: David A. Goldfarb

                    I'm a huge fan of this response.

                    Of course, there's also something to be said for recipes that just flat-out don't work-- you know, cookies with no leavening, dip with five times too much liquid, homemade pasta made of course-ground cornmeal. . .

                    1. re: jvanderh

                      I am a huge fan of your little bit of evil. Tis the season!

                      1. re: Sal Vanilla

                        I just got another one of those freaking email chain letters the other day. DO THESE PEOPLE NOT KNOW WHO THEY ARE DEALING WITH?

                        I sent her the bear paw recipe (see below) - the two recipients don't likely know each other. But you know, in referring back to this thread - which I had forgotten - I would have loved to send the Ferran Adria one. Oh well, next time. And you KNOW there will be a next time.

                    2. re: David A. Goldfarb

                      I love the "Extra points for stuffing at least one whole animal into another whole animal, procedures requiring a larding needle" part. Reminds me of Turducken! Something I would never make, as no one in my house would eat it.