Wilted at the Tilted Kilt (HOU)
A desperate search for new watering hole for the Heat Wave (ref: Angel and Ox, Katy, Demise Of) and late-lunch eatery found me on Hwy 6 N of Westheimer at the Tilted Kilt.
The name was not the only annoying thing, but more of that later.
It appears to be an Irish (also home to kilts as well as Bonnie Scotland of course) pub was the first surprise.
The second was that all of the bartenders (and there were a considerable number of them behind the not-so-large bar [maybe changeover time] I don't know the collective noun for bartenders: a "deluge" perhaps) appeared to be extremely nubile and their ages generally NOT exceeded by their waist measurements in inches (certainly I spotted one 18" or I'm a Dutchman). Jaunty tartan, bare belly, long white socks, and strappy girlish shoes.
In short: not a bad start, if you like that sort of cheap sexist gimmick to lure in reprobate middle-aged men to drink/ogle . . . which I whole-heartedly do.
Actually in some sort of rather strange ritual all girls with whom you interact ask your name and give theirs and shake hands. All very "gentlemanly" . . . except . . . . they are girls. Oh well. For some reason the word "deobjectification" (another one not in the dictionary) comes to mind.
Once I had sat down (at the bar) I could not help notice a vast blast of 100F air, similar to that that might come from a Pennsylvania blast furnace, wafting all over me negating the feeble efforts of the A/C. There are two large openings to the outside where people can sit at the bar & smoke. Great idea! Those in the bar have the combined effect of the smoke being blown in all over them ANYWAY, the hot air making life uncomfortable as hell, and for good measure a huge glare effect of the sunlight making one squint and unable to pick out the finer details of the bartenders' uniforms. In WWI and WWII aviator movies you are always warner about the enemy coming out of the sun . . . similar effect.
However irksome smoking may (or may not) be for non-smokers this lunacy underscores why the world has gone ape mad. If I had to choose between a trivial whiff of secondhand smoke and both boiling to death, and being blinded and squinting like Biggles and being unable to identify the particular clan tartans from which the scanty bikini tops were made . . . well I think you know where I stand.
Now the food I witnessed looked quite good and a especially a not-horrible-looking (actually I would consider giving it a try myself, and I am extremely picky about) pizza made to order. Their burger looked good. The patrons eating recommended both when I asked them.
I didn't eat though owing to trying to place an urgent call to my opthamologist for sun-induced eye strain.
Also their Guinness (while reasonably well-kept & tasty) was NOT attractively priced at $6.50 per pour. And the girls who filled their costumes very nicely, did not likewise excel at filling a pint glass worth diddle (!!!) I might add, which at that price is unforgiveable. My "pointed" lifting up the newly served glass and evaluating the 1/2 inch gap at the top were apparently too subtle.
This is apparently an offbeat franchise. The sort of "quasi icehouse" open air effect and punitive pricing for beer is what is going to make me unlikely to return. (The happy hour 3-7 did reduce the beer to an only-slightly-better $5.50)
On the plus side, it seemed reasonably well run, and the food reasonably varied and looked good. The chef I marked as a man who knows how to cook, jsut the way you "can tell."
But the clientele at 99% male made it clear that not everyone was there to worry over the trivialities of competitive beer pricing. But clearly that is the whole business concept and nothing wrong with it (apart possibly from eliminating 50% of the human population as potential clients). That said, they were doing steady-enough trade for a Thursday lunch.
Thanks for reading.
bb
Tilted Kilt Houston
2000 Highway 6 South,
Houston, Texas
281-496-KILT (5458)
By bishopsbitter
on Jun 25, 2009 03:53 PM
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It's true that their target market could care less. Tilted Kilt is a Twin Peaks/Hooters that has completely failed at emulating a Fox and Hound.
My one experience there was terrible and I have vowed to never go back. At a place like this, the beer comes first and their pours are beyond help. It's sad the brainless TnA droids can't pour anything to save their life. On top of all this, like you had said, it's mindboggling how they have the audacity to charge so much for beer just because of a bunch of girls in skimpy skirts.
And from one Chowhound to another, I implore you: don't bother with the food. When I went, I had a full stomach and a drink was the only thing on my mind, but I'm not gonna refuse if a friend offers a taste. I had sampled a slice of pizza off my buddy's and let's just say I would've rather gone to the frozen foods and picked up a box of Totino's. I also tried the chicken fingers which tasted like rubber and had a remarkable semblance to Tyson's "chicken".
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I do wish you could find a good place, and I will try and do better at helping you find a good watering hole on the west side (or within a reasonable drive for you). I can't personally vouch for it, but I know there's also Einstein's Pub in Katy if you'd be interested in trying it.
Nonetheless I'll do what I can and keep an eye out for you, especially if they do a good Guiness pour. If I'm not at B&B, my rotation also includes the G-Man, Saucer, or Firkin & Phoenix.
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AIr,
Yes although the pizza "looked" good, so do many of the photos in freezer cases on boxes of Red Baron. After the pizza-eater had departed I started to notice an afterglow of cardboard odors.
That said, their Guinness was at least in reasonably good drinkable state.
I know Einstein's has a following. Is that the place in the same mini-mall as Mantra Indian Restaurant? I do generally have an apostrophe-s rule about places (McSorley's excepted) but may waive it and try it.
Wish it were possible to get closer in to Houston but really it spoils it if the drive is longer than 45 minutes, at least for any regular hangout.
I have tried the "Stadia Sports Bar and Grill" in the same Willagio Town Center as was the Angel and Ox. They only have canned Guinness though.
I did return to Baker Street in La Centerra (a sign of desperation) earlier this week and it had not improved. There's something terminally depressing about the place. Like no-one cares a jot about any of the customers.
Red Lion still is streets ahead of anywhere else I think except that it's a bit clique-ey in terms of its bar crowd.
Gingerman almost killed me off with their awful "cask conditioned" ale so I can't warm to it at all. Saucer . . . have not been to yet. Is Firkin and Phoenix that place by the River Oaks cinema? Canadian chain yes?
What is the Fox and Hounds like on Westheimer (but again generally a bridge too far for me).
Maybe will stagger to Einstein's today. This heat does give one a thirst.
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Einstein's wasn't horrible, but with 16oz pints throw off my circadian rhythms and likely will not suffice. Quite a few English folks there.
The non-stop loud musical "tribute" to the late Mr Jackson did not appeal.
They made me feel welcome though and I enjoyed the much-needed dose of secondhand smoke quite a bit.
It was a bar that felt like a bar not a kiddie arcade (except for the plethora of kiddie arcade games, mind you I can't talk as in 1982 I became obsessed with a PacMan machine in my lunchtime bar (the Buttery) in St Paul MN).
Still looking for A&O replacement.
Oh, one additional snippet of information was that the Angel and Ox might have been sold "as-is" to a new owner planning to re-open in short order. So hold the presses for breaking news on that.
Incidentally for those who might think "why the **** should we care one way or the other about your quests for Guinness in a 50 mile radius from your home when it's you who chose to live in the backwaters of Colorado County" . . . . I must say you ahve an excellent point!
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Returned here to find attention had been made to the "glare" and "Death Valley" problems. Perhaps related to my post, perhaps not. But it was an excellent move. A dark tarp had been put up to stop the glare from the smokers' hatches. And they also cut the hot wind/ heat coming indoors. It was MUCH cooler inside as a result.
I still find the deobjectification ponderous man. The girls are nice enough and I don't objectify them to start with (and the fact that all others do is not my problem!), and I for one am not assuming they are clueless objects, but neither do I want to shake hands and exchange names with a girl bartender when I am trying to mind my own business & drink Guinness. One size does not fit all!
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The Wilted Tilted Kilt is CLOSED. (Noted today driving by hoping for a 20 oz Guinness.)
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Tilted Kilt
2000 Highway 6 S, Houston, TX 77077
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Try this out next time you're in Katy. They support the local brewery there too!
http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/...
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Thanks Air but this thread started with the demise of the Angel & Ox (the previous pub in those same premises). The Public House I don't find very congenial, especially now that they dispense in 16oz "pints". Their blaring music and sports TV and disinterested and unfriendly style of service & welcome is not my idea of a good drinking habitat. Mind you, it's way better than the dread Baker St . . . but then everywhere else is.
I don't know if you've tried the "Pub Hub" at 20095 Katy Freeway but ditto on that. Maybe I should try it out again but their Guinness was "piped" and nasty.
I am hoping the relaunch of the Ashford pub (lost licence at original location on Dairy Ashford) will provide a renewed chance for good Guinnesses.
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Hate to break it to ya, Pub Hub closed down a few months ago.
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No surprise actually. But surely a short run they had even by todays' standards. how long were they open?
I ran into their manager "casing" The Public House in terms of how much business they were doing on a Saturday lunch. The manager seemed to think it was they who were going to fold. So much for that. theory.
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Public House
22758 Westheimer Pkwy, Katy, TX 77450
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