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Most Disgusting Cereal, Ever.

I just bought the most disgusting cereal ever: Trader Joe's "Cherry Almond Clusters." Now it seemed like a good idea, crunchy granola mixed with dried cherries and almonds, and the photo on the pachage looked appetizing... but no! What's inside the box looks like what birds sometimes leave on my car: deep cherry colored granola (!) mixed with large corn flakes (to lighten up the appearance I suspect) plus genuinely good cherries and probably also almonds (I haven't noticed them thanks to the distracting red granola clusters). It's also actually too sweet for my taste.

I can't remember ever having a disgusting cereal before, are there others out there?

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  1. Wheatabix. Not bad dry but turns to wet newspaper mush once the milk hits it.

    8 Replies
    1. re: Daniel

      So true. That stuff is awful.

      1. re: Kagey

        the trick to weetabix is to eat it with yogurt or kefir instead of milk - enough moisture to soften it a bit without making it disintegrate.

        1. re: goodhealthgourmet

          My brother -in-law, an Aussie, eats his wheatabix religiously every morning. even when my sister went into labor at 3 in the morning, he first had to have a "bowl o' me wheatabix" first!

      2. re: Daniel

        Are you talking about Muffets? I freakin' love those things. I break them up, put the milk on and walk away for about 5 minutes.

        Well, I wouldn't say it's the best tasting stuff but, I find it refreshing and filling. It just gives me that kick start for the day.

        1. re: Daniel

          My roommates in Vancouver BC brown the Weetabix topped with butter and brown sugar for about ten minutes in a 350 oven. Pour milk over the top and eat before it turns mushy. Lovely on a cold wet morning.

          1. re: Daniel

            I adore weetabix cakes. but they do rake some dedication to fully appreciate. my mom calls them cowpies.

            1. re: Daniel

              I love Wheatabix. And Muffets. And Shredded Wheat...But I intentionally make them soggy and add brown sugar. Yum.

              1. re: Blush

                I loooooove weetabix. However if my day job doesn't work out, I'm going to patent a glue made of dried up Weetabix. If you don't rinse your bowl out straight away once you're done, that stuff sets like CONCRETE!

            2. Check out the Cheap-Ass Cereals Hall of Fame on The Sneeze, which sadly appears to be suspending operations. (We miss you, Steve, come back.)

              http://www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/...

              1 Reply
              1. re: tatamagouche

                Those are some terrible looking cereals!

              2. Puffed rice. My mom used to feed me that junk. Blech.

                1 Reply
                1. re: spellweaver16

                  ditto...oh how I hated that montrous bag of what looked like mini-packing peanuts to me...and pretty much tasted the same to boot.

                2. Any of those sugar bombs that had little, dehydrated, multicoloured marshmallow bits.

                  1 Reply
                  1. i was a cereal freak for most of my life, until i had to give it up following a gluten-intolerance diagnosis. over the years i think i tried pretty much every cereal in existence, and few were truly gag-worthy. the only ones that still make me shudder at the mere thought of eating them are the ones with artificial berry flavoring of any kind, e.g. franken berry, boo berry, cap'n crunch crunch berries, kix berry [you get the idea]. for some reason the cloyingly sweet artificial berry flavoring is particularly vile to me...which actually makes me think i'd probably hate the TJ's cereal as much as the OP did.

                    26 Replies
                    1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                      yeah, i dislike all the ones you mention here as well. artificial berry and yogurt flavors are not to my liking.

                      conversely, i don't think i've ever met a chocolatey cereal i didn't like (coco puffs, coco krispies, coco pebbles, and reese cup cereal are all fantastic). peanut butter crunch is lovely.

                      1. re: beelzebozo

                        i'm *so* with you on the chocolate & PB...don't forget count chocula ;)

                        i had to give up cereal before i ever tried the chocolate varieties of chex & special k, but i've heard both are pretty nasty. however, if i could still eat the stuff, i'd be all over a box of chocolate lucky charms...

                        1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                          I really like most varieties of the Special K brand, and I reasonably assumed that I'd like the chocolate one as well- I tried it once, and never again. You'd think it would be at least halfway decent, considering I already like plain Special K... I think my personal issue is the waxy texture of the "chocolate" bits - something just doesn't seem right, haha.

                          1. re: gyozagirl

                            Interesting...I was reading through this thread to see if anyone besides me thought that Coco-Wheats was the most disgusting cereal of all time. Dad kept getting it for us because he thought that of COURSE we'd like it. We suffered a long time over that, since it was a given in our house that one ate what was set before one without any adverse comments.

                            I always liked puffed rice, probably the least nutritious cereal ever invented...

                            1. re: gyozagirl

                              You beat me to the punch. Special K chocolate was awful. I threw it away. It's not chocolate- it's brown wax. Little scrapings of chocolate flavored candles.

                        2. re: goodhealthgourmet

                          I'm pretty sure those cherry colored granola chunks had artificial cherry flavor, ugh. The dried cherries were actually sort of good though, I might try separately adding dried cherries to some more appealing granola.

                          1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                            There are gf (gluten-free) cereals. I eat Mesa Sunrise and corn flakes from Nature's Path, available at WFM and TJ's.

                            1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                              There's also Nature's Path Envirokidz Peanut Butter Panda Puffs. We haven't tried the Koala Crisp (chocolate). http://www.naturespath.com/products/e...

                              1. re: lgss

                                thanks, i know. the problem is that i'm also soy-intolerant, and a lot of the GF cereals contain soy. the few that i can eat these days have too much sugar in them anyway...so i just make my own granola with GF oats. tastes a heck of a lot better than anything i've ever bought, and it's much healthier to boot.

                                i'll have to try the mesa sunrise one of these days, but i'm skipping the panda puffs because they may be made with soybean oil. it's a bummer too, because i love PB-flavored cereal!

                                btw, while we're on the subject, have you tried the Bakery On Main GF Granola [or the one from TJ's, which is the same product]?

                                1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                  hey ghg, hope nyc is treating you well!

                                  i've had the apple cinnamon granola - i had to pick out the walnuts where possible.

                                  if you like banana and coconut flavors, you should try the rainforest flavor.

                                  1. re: Emme

                                    emme! i miss seeing your name in the boards...hope all is well in LA.

                                    the reason i asked is that i personally hated the stuff. i tried a sampling of each flavor at WFM. they were all to sweet, the corn flavor was overpowering, and i thought the fruit flavors [e.g. "apple"] tasted artificial, even though there's real fruit in there - i think they try to "boost" it with addeds...or maybe it was the cinnamon? anyway, i also have a major issue with the fact that it's NOT granola! it's corn cereal with some dried fruits, seeds & nuts tossed in. no oats to be found anywhere in the stuff. very misleading, and semantically incorrect...which, as everyone knows, bothers the heck out of me :)

                                    1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                      interesting, i don't buy any of them regularly - to me they're not worth the caloric investment, but then again cereal or granola isn't a daily *indulgence* for me, more of a desserty type thing. i like cinnamon so i remember thinking that one wasn't bad. i haven't tried any of the others, but my friend liked the rainforest one, if only for the tropical dried flavors in it. i know that misleading info is a pet peeve of yours, so i totally respect that. i'm so over gluten free products to replace inherently gluten based products-i'd rather avoid than struggle with the synthetic process. except for my favorite cereal (which i know you can't have due to the soy :( )

                                  2. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                    We're also vegan and I think the TJs GF Granola contains honey.

                                    We had a coupon for Envirokidz so we picked up a bag of the Koala Crisp (chocolate) this weekend but haven't tried it yet. It appears not to contain soy. Organic brown rice flour, organic evaporated cane juice, organic cocoa, natural chocolate flavor, sea salt, organic molasses and organic rice bran extract, but is made in a facility that processes soy, so depends how sensitive you are...
                                    You've right about the Envirokidz, I commented to my husband that they're GF but they're also nutrient-free.

                                    1. re: lgss

                                      "they're GF but they're also nutrient-free."
                                      ~~~~~~~~
                                      that's been my biggest issue with most GF products from day one. it's the reason i decided to get into the business myself - to give people options that taste as good as traditional products *and* are actually nutritious.

                                      1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                        Millet, quinoa, brown rice, and buckwheat for hot cereal.

                                        1. re: lgss

                                          yeah, i've done all sorts of combos. but i'm still a huge fan of oats & oat bran, so the certified GF oat products have made me a verrry happy woman. if only i could find a suitable GF substitute for wheat germ. flax meal comes close, but i miss that toasted wheat flavor.

                                          1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                            ghg,

                                            try taking your certified GF oat products, grind them into a finer powder, then toast/broil til browned and nuttier in the oven... it replicates some of that wheat germ toasty flavor.

                                            1. re: Emme

                                              thanks emme. i actually did try that with the oat bran a few times! it's close, but not quiiite there...

                                  3. re: lgss

                                    Personally I find the Envirokidz line waaay too sweet....too much like count chocula and friends to me. Thankfully the kids are good with Barbara's Bakery cereals, particularly Puffins plain/cinnamon.

                                    1. re: maplesugar

                                      i wish puffins didn't contain oat flour...

                                      1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                        I love that their cereals are kid-friendly and only lightly sweetened...the kids would prefer there was friendly cartoon animals on the boxes like Envirokidz but they still ask for Shredded Spoonfuls just about every morning(I checked the label, ufortunately it's not GF either).

                                        1. re: maplesugar

                                          thanks, i know - i've looked at all the labels countless times.

                                          it may not be a cartoon character, but don't the kids like that cute little puffin on the box? i saw real ones at sea world when i lived in san diego. very cool creatures.

                                        2. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                          honey rice puffins are actually GF, i think.

                                          totally agreed on envirokidz. they are just too sweet!

                                          1. re: allieinbklyn

                                            i just looked at the web site, and they are GF! thanks allie...i could hug you right now :)

                                            1. re: goodhealthgourmet

                                              unfort they are not nearly as good as the other flavors... :( (to me at least - you should obviously try!) :)

                                            2. re: allieinbklyn

                                              Unfortunately Puffins Honey Rice tastes awful. Just awful... Like stale coconut slivers. yuck.