Help! Militant Organic Roomy!!!!
I moved in with a wonderful roomy earlier this year. We are both single ladies in our "middle" years. I'm a single parent, she has no children....which I'm not sure is really apropos.....BUT
When my son and I moved in, we were in some dire economic straits due to health problems that I had been having. She is a hard-core organic eater.....to the extent that she is even opposed to cooking foods except when absolutely essential. She suggessted that my health problems could be solved by eating organic, and stated that while I am at her house my son and I should eat organic...."because if you get sick, then it affects me too".
We then embarked on several weeks where discussions were held regularly about why certain foods that I had purchased were "bad". This included many organic foods that I had purchased in an attempt to comply with her request. Organic bread was only acceptable if it had no "enriched" flour. Organic cereal was still not good because it had too much sugar. Organic eggs were only good if they were fertilized. I could go on and on!
This woman has been very kind in many ways! I would really love to keep peace with her as well as respect her household. But I am not really interested in becoming an "organic" right now.....if that's even what it's called. Problem is, she's now insisting that we eat organic. She says that since we've discussed this, I now know better and I shouldn't use the excuse that it's difficult to change a lifetime of habits........just DO IT! The implication is, of course, OR ELSE!
Help! How does one deal with this kind of eating "religion"? How do you tell someone you really care for that she's crossed the line? Or am I crazy? --This is a trick question! ;)--
I'd be interested in hearing stories, suggestions, or even lectures (short please) on the subject.
My former roommates were militant vegans. They just sort of turned vegatarian and then vegan over a period of about 6 months. They used to soapbox to me all the time about their diets being so much better than mine, me being a bloodthirsty cruel person for eating animal products, etc. etc. etc. I often laughed at them as they claimed to use no animal products but were always drinking cheap wines, which are often clarified with animal products. We went round and round about this for quite a while. The issue was only solved by them moving out and getting their own place. We are still the best of friends, but there is no way we could live together again.
Ha ha. I respect people's fanaticisms as long as they don't impose it on me. I'm an adult and can make my own decisions and don't like to be told what to do. I'm sure a lot of people on this board could be viewed as crazy by outsiders searching for the perfect taco, driving 80 miles out of your way for the best pizza, etc.
Sounds like she's dabbling in raw food territory, which is an extreme way of eating. I noticed a lot of extreme people generally don't have tolerance for people who don't view things their way. Not everybody is like that, of course. I really respect people who can stick by their guns (no matter how outlandish they may be) and not shove their views down people's throats. It takes a lot of tolerance and self-control to do that. I'm still working on that every time I see DH drink way too much wine.
I lived for a few years with roommates who kept Kosher. We were all really respectful of each other and got along well. Luckily there were two sinks (one was mine, and the other was kept Kosher that changed from meat to dairy). The oven was kept Kosher. I always covered it when I cooked my non-Kosher items. We had two sets of dishes. So with some compromises, it was a non-issue. I learned some fascinating things about Judaism and food during those years. While I don't keep Kosher, it was really interesting to learn a different culture than what I was brought up with -- taking part in Shabbat dinners, celebrating Passover, learning how much I dislike derma, etc.
Seriously, I would have a talk with your roommate -- because she sounds like there a very nice woman aside from her militant eating habits. Good roommates are hard to find. And if she can't ease up I would suggest to start looking for a new place -- because you'll probably blow up soon and taint her organic kitchen with your enriched flour bits and pieces.
btw, I eat organic most of the time -- so I have nothing against those organic people : )
I am a huge organic nut myself at home, HOWEVER, I do not expect others to see things my way.
Personally she is stepping over the line. I would buy a box of twinkees and eat the whole damn thing in front of her just to make a statement.
There is NO excuse for this food nazi attitude of hers, Tell her thank you for your advice but you will choose what to put into YOUR body, and not her. If she cannot accept it, Tell her to tolerate it or lose a friend.
I had to go back up to the top of the post to get the crucial element -- You moved into her space some time ago and she is great in most respects but this is getting on your nerves bigtime.
It sounds like she has the final say and power -- you don't have a signed lease with conditions explicitly outlined, do you? If you have a lease or are renting in a rent-controlled jurisdiction you may have some rights against arbitrary eviction. If you don't, then you need to adjust, negotiate, or simply leave.
I'm not saying what is right or wrong, correct or false -- that is barely relevant. A guy in a bulk food outlet line chastised me for asking for plastic bags, and then he drove off alone in a huge SUV. Our surge towards ethanol has disrupted food supplies as corn prices have shot through historical ceilings causing unintended consequences.
As with all decisions, there are benefits and costs to weigh. Great friend who was a lifesaver but now demands to be your guide and prophet as well... Yes, you have the right to your food and dietary choices. Yes, she seems to have the power to reclaim her habitat.
You say this woman has been kind in many ways, which I can only assume in some financial way. She's now collecting on what she feels is due.
It starts with conceding to her demands and then what? I really don't think you can assume this is the end of her wacky demands.
How old is your son? I don;t think he should see his mom being pushed around by some roommate that feels she knows best. You know what's best for you and your son - I doubt you are eating frosted flakes for dinner with a coca cola chaser. And, if you are, it's your decision - and YOUR MONEY - which you've already said, is not so plentiful.