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"Melty" Cheese

I guess "melted" isn't good enough for fast food purveyors any more. Their cheese has to be "melty." I've lost track of how many chains are advertising items featuring "melty" cheese.
When fast food chains are dumbing things down, you know you're getting into heretofore unexplored levels of dumbness.

Many years ago, Burger King came out with a ham and cheese. sandwich called a Yumbo. There was a hiliarious column in the Providence Journal by a guy who refused to order a Yumbo. He kept asking for a ham and cheese sandwich. They kept asking if he wanted a Yumbo. He never got his sandwich.

And I will never order anything with "melty" in the name.

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  1. I think it's a mellifluous word with pleasant associations, at least with preparations I make myself. It implies a condition somewhere between softened and runny. My cheesey cheddar eggs, and migas, are melty. My pile of corned beef is nuked 45 seconds, then topped with swiss for 25 more seconds to get it melty and then I spatula the delectable whole mess on seeded rye. My grilled havarti on rye is decadently melty. Melty brie is delicious, as is cheddar on apple pie. If you choose to abandon the word, I'll adopt it!

    1. "Melty" cheese makes me think of some unholy semi-liquid combination of Velveeta and Cheez Whiz, with maybe some salt thrown in for flavour. I would pass on any such corporate menu item as well.

      You can call your homemade recipes anything you want, of course. They use real cheese. :)

      7 Replies
      1. re: Pincus

        Funny, I have the word 'meltedy' in my head. Not having used it in public, of course, I just recall having seen it on TV or read the word 'meltedy' over the last hundred years. Okay, fifty.

        But I know whereof you speak, BobW. I hate the word 'sammie'. I won't use the word 'sammie', I won't say the word 'sammie', and if I had my druthers, I wouldn't even have typed the word 'sammie'.

        And oh boy, is there ANYthing better than a 'meltedy' cheese sandwich?

        1. re: dolores

          As bad as "sammie," is, I'm sure you agree with me that "brekkie" is even worse.

          "Yes, I'd like an Egg McMuffin. You know, the brekkie sammie on an english muffie with melty cheese."

          I don't talk to my kids like that, and they aren't even four.

          1. re: Bob W

            That's funny, I hate the word Sammie with a passion but I think brekkie is kinda funny. It's funny to say at least, but on a menu it would look stupid.

            1. re: virtualguthrie

              I don't like these words either but I think it's the nature of all people to play with language to add different feelings to the mundane common meaning. "Brolly" for umbrella is a typical and much older example.

              I think "melty" is supposed to evoke a feeling of oozing, melting cheese that does not congeal like standard cheese that is heated to a point where it melts but starts to resolidify as it cools. "Melty" is meant to imply the cheese is more of a sauce. If you search the web, you'll find there are recipes for "melty" cheese.

            2. re: Bob W

              Have you spent any time in Australia? That is where I first heard the term 'brekkie', and indeed saw it on menus in casual places, long before I ever heard it in the States (Indeed, I always assumed it originated as Ozzie slang)...and I don't think of it in a 'baby talk' context at all, just endearing slang.....(and rather well-established slang at that, at least in some parts of the world)

              http://www.urbandictionary.com/define...

              1. re: susancinsf

                My Australian friends use the word "brekkie" commonly. I always assumed it is Oz slang...

                1. re: janetofreno

                  We lived in Oz 20 years ago, and people routinely referred to breakfast as "brekkie."

        2. I used to hate ordering a "whopper'. Seriously, how moronic does that actually sound? I'd like a whopper please. Actually I WOULD like Whopper, I think they taste the best for fast food burgers, I just hate saying it.

          1 Reply
          1. re: scuzzo

            If you're ever in Brunswick, Maine, you should try a classic drive-in -- with carhops! -- called Fat Boy's. Their flagship burger is "the Whoper Burger." (Take one guess what happened to the missing p.) Of course when I saw that I ordered a "woaper" and not a "wopper."

          2. There really is no word that conveys the idea of "melty." To me, this means a cheese that melts very well. Therefore, I would have no hesitation in describing Italian Fontina as a "melty" cheese.

            1. I rather like the term "melty"--it reminds of my best friend (and fellow cooking/margarita-drinking buddy) from graduate school. She'd always use the term"melty" when referring to cheese that melts well.

              She also used to call those bendable straws "bendy straws". I actually picked that up and still use it!

              1. Check this out! They are actually going to add melty to the dictionary.

                http://www.theonion.com/content/news_...

                I have never heard brekkie before, but when my daughter was little she called it "greckfast" and we still call it that. She also thought TV dinners were "square meals". LOL!

                2 Replies
                1. re: danhole

                  Ummm..... you do realize that The Onion is a parody news source, not a real one, right?

                2. I can't order things that have ridiculous name. No Rootie Tootie Fresh n Fruity (or however that's spelled) for me. Sammie would be on that list.

                  Maybe this is how marketing geniuses figure out how successful they are. If they bring words like sammie or melty or whatever else to the public, they listen to see if we use it in common language even when we're not referring to the item. Then they know they're successful and pat each other on the backs and hand out awards for being brilliant.

                  1. Last time I ate Arby's was with my younger nephew, who is 18. We were in the drive thru and he was driving. I ordered a roast beef and told my nephew to be sure and ask for Horsey Sauce. He looked at me like I had grown another head! I said, that is what it is called, I am not kidding you. He said, Aunt Dori, if I ask for Horsey Sauce, they are really going to know what I am asking for? I promised him they would, and they did and he tasted the sauce later and like it too.