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need help with a macabre "menu" (not for the squeamish)

  • m

my halloween costume this year will be "cannibal chef" (maybe a celebrity chef turned cannibal, if i can figure out which chef to do - would love to be paula deen, but don't think i can pull that one off).

i need your help in creating a menu for my restaurant. i've tentatively named the place "raoul's". what i'm looking for are enough ideas to fill a one-page specials menu, preferably things that are a "pun"ny take on the real thing. alternatively, dishes that would visually lend themselves to substituting people parts would work, too.

so, help me out with some gruesome suggestions for meals...

ps. if vegetarians eat vegetables, then what do humanitarians eat?

(edit: please note, this is all in jest. i do not own a real restaurant, nor do i serve/consume people.)

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  1. Manburgers (or spiral-sliced man)
    Peo-ple Platter (as opposed to puu puu platter [sp?])
    Dork tenderloin
    Clark au Vin
    Fingerling sandwiches
    Mealoaf (w/ a picture of the singer)
    Vicky-soisse. and/or Bill-abaise.

    3 Replies
    1. re: Discoethan

      Don't forget the blood oranges! (You could even carve a face into them)

      You can get jello molds that look like brains.

      1. re: Discoethan

        Ha! If you do nothing else, please use the meatloaf idea.

        1. re: ellaguru

          Do this meatloaf cake. Get a phototransfer onto edible paper of Meatloaf (any picture of meatloaf would be macabre) to decorate the top.

          http://www.marthastewart.com/portal/s...

      2. I'm thinking Sweeney Todd's might be an apt - etizing name for your restaurant.

        1. Are you cooking some of these things as a visual joke as well? Could be great fun!

          As the the "body parts" dish names, maybe think steak and kidney pie, chitterlings, tongue sandwiches, head cheese, liver-n-onions. Not Punny, but maybe filler for those killer puns. Or maybe source your menu items with the "donor's" name, e.g., head cheese charcuterie plate (many thanks to Bob.)

          Have fun - sounds like you have a great sense of humor. Please - do tell what you finally come up with!

          1. leg of man
            brains
            baby cheeks
            breasts of chicks
            blood pudding
            New York stripper
            Chicken a la Elvis The King
            Sloppy Joes
            Human Wellington

            1 Reply
            1. re: Janet

              Don't forget the basket of sweetbreads. And how about a Pate of Patty?

            2. great ideas everybody, thanks!

              and, yes, i might try to whip up a prop or two.

              1. soylent green

                fried green tomatoes and barbecue

                For a drink, you can stuff lychees w/ dates as a "olives" but they look like eye balls.

                1. "ps. if vegetarians eat vegetables, then what do humanitarians eat?"

                  Did you know that the term "Long Pig" is actually human beings? It's a cannibal term, I believe, from a old book. So, now you know what humanitarians eat!

                  1. I don't know if you have a Party City store in your area, but they had en entire section called the Meat Market where they had all sorts of fake limbs packaged in styrofoam containers with shrinkwrap (to look like supermarket meat) and they even sold a fake grill covered in fake blood so you could "cook" your specialties. I thought it was very clever!

                    http://www.partycity.com/cgi-bin/part...

                    1. Cream of Sum Yun Guy (alfredo?)

                      Long and thinly sliced beets in a salad... Brains

                      Eyeballs... Deviled eggs topped with an olive or caper for the pupil

                      Toasted Nuts... candied walnuts or pecans

                      1. I made a brain cake once that was easy to do. I baked it in a stainless steel bowl. Cut it in half, cut the corners off and put it together (left and right half). Frosted w/ grayish red frosting (used black and red food coloring) from a pastry bag fitted w/ largish round tip to get the ridges. Then drizzled red food coloring on it. Looks like a big large brain.

                        1. I read this in a comic strip, of all things, today that you can use pea soup for vomit! Gross, but isn't that what you are asking for?