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Jun 24, 2007 09:11 AM

McLoone's - Pier Village (Long Branch)

If you’re looking for a nice, quiet evening of fine dining at an affordable price, you’ll want to stay away from McLoone’s Pier House in Long Branch.

As its name implies, McLoone’s overlooks the Atlantic and sits on the boardwalk adjacent to the mind numbingly trendy Pier Village shops. Yes, the ocean’s pretty. But once you get past the view, there’s not much to recommend.

McLoone’s was jammed packed on a Friday, though it’s hard to see why. The configuration of the dining room and the acoustics combine to make it very noisy; it is difficult to have a normal conversation without shouting. As for ambiance…well, you could always make your way to the bar and listen to investment bankers sing Don Henley karaoke.

McLoone’s lack of charm is well-matched with its mediocre food. Our spicy tuna roll appetizer was positively yummy, if lacking a bit in the tuna department. But my Cajun blackened tilapia was average at best; no taste buds could discern the fish’s delicate flavor underneath this avalanche of spice. His peppercorn calamari salad was tasty, but the calamari was served lukewarm and a bit rubbery, not hot and crisp as I prefer.

Service was mostly fine, but we had to ask for a candle for our table as every other table had one. I also noticed while walking out every other table had a bread basket, but we were not provided one nor asked if we wanted one.

Due to location, the entrees are somewhat pricey, and would-be diners checking McLoone’s online menu will find it out of date.

Originally posted on my blog

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  1. My wife and I ate their once after we walked out of Avenue when they refused to turn the music down (4 tables in the entire restaurant). Her burger was horrible. My broiled salmon filet was unremarkable, except that it came with Uncle Bens wild rice pilaf, right out of an institutional bag. Stay away, except for a beer, maybe.

    3 Replies
    1. re: soigne

      I agree. I have been there on 2 occassions and I should have stayed away after my first expereince. The food is sub-par and outrageously over priced. I wonder if they have actually ever tasted their own food? They should be embarrased to be charging those prices for the quality of food they serve. Everything is a piece of fish sloppped over a heaping pile of mashed pot. and veggie medley. Unfortunately Pier Village has become a dissapointment. I have yet to try Sirena yet though. Any different than McCloone's and Avenue or is the same old story going on over there too? (overpriced and poor quality?)

      1. re: stack_c

        Never mind! Just read other post about Sirena! Answered my own question. Eeeks!

      2. re: soigne

        I went ther ewith my wife, the view was gorgeous, the decor was nice, but it was without question the worst lobster I have ever had. How do you mess up lobster? They did. With the decline in the Seabright location these two sad excuses for restaurants should be banned from charging people for food.

      3. Pier Village is a waste which is a shame. Friends of ours went to the Avenue and after dinner wanted to go upstairs and have a drink. They were told they "weren't the kind of people" that they wanted in the bar! Our friend's are early 50's, good looking couple and just spent way too much on mediocre food. Needless to say we will never eat there! Went to McLoone's once and left after waiting almost an hour to get our food at the bar. It was a cheese plate, an hour to get a cheese plate! Never would go back. Oh well!

        1 Reply
        1. re: Densell

          I agree, what a waste. I ate once at McCloones- horrible and $$$$$$. I also ate at Sirena and luckily the tab was picked up by my brother-in-law. The food was absolutely unremarkable. I find that for the most part all these water front restaurants are not good- Matisse is another example of one that I thought was horrific and so overpriced.

        2. The original comment has been removed
          1. Pier Village...just look at the place. It would be a MIRACLE if there was actually any decent food there.

            4 Replies
            1. I think people are solely attracted to the view. It can't be because of the food. Its horrid!!!!

              1. re: bgut1

                Agreed with all the above. I thought the food was bearly edible when I had dinner there. However, I did go to brunch one Sunday and it was an okay buffet. Of course, the mimosa (free!) was the smallest stingiest drink I have ever been served. And we had to get up and pour our own 2nd cups of coffee....

                1. re: scoutnj

                  As I have said in the past ...

                  The only thing worth eating at Pier Village is the deluxe Caramel Apples from Rocky Mountain Chocolates :o)

                  McLoones = overpriced crud
                  Avenue = rude, overpriced, misrepresented

                  I guess some fast food from Stewarts or Greek to Me may be OK.

                  1. re: seal

                    I agree. The sweets from Rocky Mountain are the best thing esp the champagne truffles.

                    Turning Point is a close second.

            2. It has a nice view of the ocean...................................Hmmmmm? can't think of anything else. :(